my stepdad is into this game on the computer. it's all about this online sh*t!! Since the beginning of last month all he plays is this online game called "second life." But, he's married to my mom and was supposed to pick up me and my mom from the casino at 2:30 a.m. he didn't come to pick us up after we called him 6 more times 14 hours later at 3:p.m. the next day but tells his kids that she has to go to the casino weekly because she "likes to" now she likes to go, but only for like 2 or 3 hours not 5,8,10,25 Fuc*ing hours!!!!! her & I cant drive. in this online game he spends all day on it. If he ever goes out anywhere it's with his kids to the football games. when he's here at the house, he's either eating, or spending time on the computer. HE DOESN'T EVEN GIVE MY MOM 5 MINUTES OF TIME FOR HER!!!!! IT'S LIKE SHE'S NON-EXISTENT. and he likes to talk to women on that game and has porn sites written down in his office, he has time for 12-14 hours a day on that freekin game, but not even 15 Fuc*ing minutes for my mom!!!! when he's off work, he's on the game till' 3:am!! and he works at 6:am!!!!! when we wake up in the morning, he's on the game till' he goes to work!!!!!! if I or my mom walk down the hallway, he closes the door to his office!!!!! he talks to this woman inparticular and he changed his e-mail because she knew his password? does he got somethin' to hide? He never will go out to do anything he always says, "go with your mom." when he gets off work, straight back to the game!!! he made my mom & I stay 13 extra hours at the casino than we wanted to when each time we called him he said,"I'll be there in an hour." Somebody, please  ! oh, 1 more thing, my mom is the 1 that works and brings home the $$$,does his laundry,dishes,cleans up after him, he doesn't do a single Fuc*ing thing for himself, or her!!!! Now he doesn't treat her bad, actually, he doesn't really treat her like anything. but thats her transportation to work, and to her appointments to the chiropractor. oh, and he does work, but brings 1/2 less pay home than she does. then he sits at home all day, which he does at work. she's a maintnence director so she busts her ass at her work, he only sits there at his job. I need a smoke. thanks for all the opinions so far
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| I need your opinions..............for my mom....um help?!?! |
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maggiemae684
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Dec 28 @ 5:11PM
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it's your mom's marraige and it is up to her to decide how to deal with it. 
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legacy1
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Dec 28 @ 5:12PM
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Dude, give me his e-mail address and I will send him a virus that will shut him down...for good!
Seriously, your mom needs to wake up and tell this loser to hit the bricks and take his f***in computer with him...it seems he has a side thing going on...
Best wishes and keep us up to date!
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DaisyMae420
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Dec 28 @ 5:37PM
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I'm have to side with Maggie...mom has to be the one looking for answers or it's pretty much pointless. But I smell a skunk!
(next time have a cab take you home...just sayin)
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1982danaz
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Dec 28 @ 5:41PM
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she won't take cabs or buses because she's never taken public transit and has anxiety which I should have mentioned in the blog. thats also why she doesn't drive since her mom passed it made her anxiety worse.
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Peabianjay
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Dec 28 @ 5:42PM
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He's a dirtbag...but it's really up to your mom to do something about it. If she's the bread-winner...fine, so be it, but at least he can take care of housekeeping, which he's not. Dump him. Don't let him keep taking advantage.
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jamie63
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Dec 28 @ 5:43PM
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I agree with all of the above, but want to add that it sounds like there is a significant addiction going on and a great deal of online cheating.
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travelwoman
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Dec 28 @ 5:58PM
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Have your mom read your blog here and all the comments..... 
.... sounds like it's time to dump that guy, real quick, too.....
But only SHE can decide.... it's HER life...
.
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1982danaz
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Dec 28 @ 6:05PM
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Now he doesn't treat her bad, actually, he doesn't really treat her like anything. but thats her transportation to work, and to her appointments to the chiropractor. oh, and he does work, but brings 1/2 less pay home than she does. then he sits at home all day, which he does at work. she's a maintnence director so she busts her ass at her work, he only sits there at his job. I need a smoke. thanks for all the opinions so far 
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albertafire
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Dec 28 @ 6:06PM
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heck, cut the plug off the P C,, then get
rid of him...
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malexand
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Dec 28 @ 6:13PM
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Soundse like he has an addiction just like crack, alcohol or meth. Just like my brother and a good friend's son. Both happen to be named Matt.
Destroy the computer. The drug.
Cut him off unless he earns his keep. Housework, job, etc.
Addicts will not stop and recover until they have hit rock bottom. And the bottom is way lower than you think. In most cases they have to loose everything they have and them some before they hit that rock bottom.
It's very hard. My mother can't do it and keeps taking the idiot back. Now she would have to get an eviction notice to kick a 50yo kid out of her house.
I hope you and your mother have the couage. I don't envy you.
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dixiepixie
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Dec 28 @ 6:14PM
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"does he got somethin' to hide?"
No doubt he does have something to hide. Well, he's trying to hide it but apparently not too successfully.
I agree with the others. Your mom is the one who will have to make the decision as to what to do. However, from your description of his activities and how he's treating your mother  , it sounds like he needs to go.
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chevymn
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Dec 28 @ 6:37PM
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Lost my wife to that game. After a while she lost all concept of reality. The characters in the game can have sex you know? It truly is an alternate reality were you can be whoever you want to be. Fake.
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butterfly943
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Dec 28 @ 6:38PM
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Thats sad...Your Mom deserves better 
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IamTrinity
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Dec 28 @ 6:47PM
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Have you thought about seeking professional help instead of the advice of a bunch of "Dear Abby" wannabe's?
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sybnann
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Dec 28 @ 6:57PM
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In my opinion, YES, he certainly does have an addiction! I will add however that your mom needs to get counseling so that she can at some point see that she is ill as well, STAYING with a man like that that gives nothing to her or even cares. Once she values herself more, THEN it is more likely she will have the strength to make the much needed change!
Good Luck to you both! God Bless!
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kywonder
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Dec 28 @ 7:15PM
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Have you thought about seeking professional help instead of the advice of a bunch of "Dear Abby" wannabe's? Trinity, are you calling the comments here, "wanna be Dear Abbys?"
I would say that both need counseling, but you can not make someone go to counseling. There is a reason that she is staying with him.
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MetryTechie
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Dec 28 @ 7:25PM
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If willing, professional counseling for both sounds like the way to go. First, he has to realize that he has an addiction and that is affecting his marriage and actually want to change.
Otherwise, it's pointless. I will pray for your family.
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meanjolene
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Dec 28 @ 7:34PM
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It sounds like addiction to me...someone very close to me is living a virtual, rather than a real, life. It's easier, I think, to look a pictures, fantasize, and type.
I don't have any answers for you, though.
Prayers to you and yours, asking prayers for me and mine also.
Bill Gates and cohorts have a lot to answer for, no?
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gypsy29
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Dec 28 @ 7:36PM
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OOOOops! Sorry about that soda that got spilled on the pc! Both of them....
just an idea.
Seriously, your mom has a problem. Her hubby is cheating on her with the pc.
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summerbreeze916
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Dec 28 @ 9:18PM
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The two of them may want to sit down together and have a talk. Your mom needs to let him know that she more than likely knows what he's up to. They, together, will have to determine if they actually want to try and make their relationship work....or decide, together, if they even want it at all. If they do want to try to make the relationship work, perhaps they should seek counseling........together. Good luck to them. 
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UnicornLover1962
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Dec 29 @ 5:54AM
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no offense, but it seems like it bothers you more than your mother. if she wants it to stop, she'll have to make the move. you might suggest counseling for her anxieties and her fear of public transportation. that way she could get to her appts w/o your father.
also if she is paying the brunt of the bills, she could have the internet interrupted, or have a professional put a block on all r sites..like a parental block. that would stop him going there.
whatever happens, it's good you love your mom. but in the end, it's her decision. you can only support her and help her find help for herself if your dad doesn't want to go.
good luck
mel
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imlost2
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Dec 29 @ 9:45AM
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I would say this might be a blessing in disguise perhaps encourage your mom to learn to drive and become independent. Many men like the idea of having a woman trapped and dependent on them, they can't leave them that way, maybe once he realizes she doesn't need him, he might just change his ways. Even having driving books from the DNR around in plain sight and talk about it might scare him into some action thinking she has a way out. I don't know how old you are, but if she doesn't get a license you work on yours. If it's his car, work on getting a car, some places will let you make payments right at the place, talk about that. Where there is a will there is a way, it might not be a new car, but one that will get you both around. Even if it's just a plan ahead, it might shake him out of this rut he seems to be in if she's in love with him. Take care and good luck Lost
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1982danaz
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Dec 29 @ 6:08PM
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Well, 3 hours ago I asked him for a ride home. I don't want to ask him again because I know he'll get upset and throw a hissyfit, so my brother is going to pick me up to give me a ride home in an hour. Pretty pathetic that a game can consume someone that much. There is no reality in his world. Yea so, he gets upset so I'm forced to ask someone else for a ride home. If I could drive, I would, but I have a medical condition so I can't. and he was supposed to drive me home this morning!!!!!!!
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PeacefulGuy
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Dec 30 @ 12:23PM
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I suggest if the man isn't to well educated with the world of computers that you remove access site so he can't get on itanymore.. Wipe it out..
Here is a link to a site that will do the job for you..
http://www.pcworld.com/downloads/file/fid,7228-order,1-page,1-c,alldownloads/description.html
follow it's instructions..
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SpiritOrnery
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Dec 30 @ 2:49PM
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sounds like your mother needs to be treated for anxiety because SHE is allowing him to control her because SHE will not take responsibility for herself. Also sounds like everyone in the family is addicted to something. Hey, quit going to the casino if you keep being left there and you do not like that.
Sounds like the two of you have a bigger problem than he does because you are dependant on someone undependable. Learn to take public rides if you hate waiting on him. Stop making someone else accountable for you and her.
What if he suddenly died? Then what? You two would HAVE to get over it. How would she work then? How do YOU work? Pull y'alls big boy and big girl panties on and get responsible and maybe he will get more responsible.
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