And remember the time
you and Stella and I ended up in Miami Beach?
How, when we were swimming,
the hard surf yanked my shorts clean off me,
wallet and all (doh!)
and Stella had to run back to the hotel
we 23 hippies were living in
to get my other shorts,
and I had to sit, waist deep in the surf, butt naked,
while you leaped and cavorted on the beach,
barking and laughing at me,
trying to make me get out of the water.
How the lifeguard came in the middle of all this
(Stella took a while, she probably stopped to  )
and told me "No dogs on the beach."
and I was trying to explain
over the noisy surf and your barking
and Stella finally returned,
slowly and stonedly,
giggling and flirting with the lifeguard,
after tossing my shorts to me.
How the guard said I could bring you back after dark
and the code word is "Itchy Brother"
which I recognized from "The King and Odie"
and we laughed about "Biggy Rat and Itchy Brother"
and I came back later and burned on with him.
Remember how you loved to hitchhike, Pud?
How we taught you to sit on the side of the road
and hold up one paw
and people would stop and give us rides
because you were so cute
and because Stella and I looked so ridiculously harmless
in our Rainbow gathering finery.
Remember how my mom loved you
becuase you were so sweet,
and how my dad loved you because you were
a big (80 lbs, by then!), smart, bad ass dog
he could take rock hunting or canoeing
and you never needed a leash.
Remember how Kerry loved you and you loved Kerry
so much, you'd hump his leg and he'd laugh
and you'd do it some more
because you loved to make people laugh.
How Kerry wrote in my book:
"Burn the buddha,
smash the state,
and don't let your dog f*ck any porcupines!"
Remember how we lived in my VW campervan?
It was just you and me, buddy!
Stells and Kozmik had gotten each other pregnant
while I was supporting them,
so I had to wean them and take my dog, you, Pud,
and live in that groovy camper next to that big field of kudzu,
where you would disappear under the leaves,
trying to befirend feral cats that lived under there
and didn't really want to be befriended.
You were a trooper, Pud,
you were down with everything,
you went everywhere with me.
I don't know why I had to leave you with Ron.
I was gonna come back for you in another week.
I told Ron not to leave you on a leash, that you hated that.
Of course, you broke free.
No one took you, you wouldn't have that,
you'd tear their ass up!
You distrusted Ron and you hated being tied up and you
broke free and ran, probably looking for me.
But you were across the interstate from me, in Atlanta,
I won't think about that.
And I won't think about
the horrible thing schitzophrenic Annie told me, either.
You made it somewhere safe.
You rescued a little blind boy from a well
and now you live with him.
You know, Pud,
I think the time you really showed what you were made of
was when Kozmik, Stella and I (and you)
were up at Cloudland Canyon
in the North Georgia mountains
and we stupid humans sat up over that waterfall smoking
until the sun went down over the mountains
and it became dark really fast
and you, Pud, were the only one
who could find the non-existent trail
back up the cliff we'd climbed down
to get to the waterfall.
I thought you were wrong
and I fell into the water
trying to prove it.
You were right,
and we followed your white, wagging tail
and the sound of your voice
all the way back up to the trail
we were warned by many signs not to leave.
Of course, you had to lead us through mud
on our way back to our camp, which was a car.
You were an amazing dogperson, mighty Pud!
You would have died of old age, by now.
I guess you're somewhere humping Kerry's leg
and getting fed kielbasa by my mom
and canoeing with my dad.
The rest of us are still down here
getting led through mud by laughing dogs.
[I miss my Deda...  Angel x]
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| An Ode to Pud the Wonder Dog : Part 2 |
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