There used to be a couple who blogged here often. Each of them was quite talented with the written word. So talented in fact, many were envious of them. Personally, I would love to be able to weave a story half as well as either of them did.
Lots of people referred to the couple as “squirrels.” As it goes, the lady of the couple was a huge animal lover & squirrel rehabilitator. She often posted stories of her “Tiny Tales.” As for the man, well, I’m not sure what his forte was, but he had quite the ability to stir up angst amongst a certain group of people around here. Those folks kept quite a bit stirred up about the couple as well. It seems now all of them have disappeared.
People were always accusing this couple of writing blogs “targeting” or “baiting” them. I’m not sure how innocent the couple was…or how guilty, but I am beginning to understand how it feels.
Seems of late, I am being accused of the same sort of stuff. I have posted blogs on here before about incidences that have occurred on the site, but this particular posting has nothing to do with any of that. I’ve been questioned over & over again about certain rules on the site. I’m not even quite sure why I have been the one questioned. The only thing I’ve been able to come up with is for the sake of argument.
I don’t like arguments. I don’t mind a healthy discussion on any topic I am well versed in….if I’m not well versed, I’m not even going to engage in discussion. But when things get pushed to arguing on here…in emails or whatever, I’d just as soon call it quits. There’s too much fun to be had & too many good & nice people to hang out with to bat a topic back & forth with someone who gets too heated…and calls me a liar.
It can indeed be a struggle to exist around here some times. Personally, when I have any sort of big disagreement with someone, I stay away from them. By staying away, I mean I don’t email them, I don’t comment on their blogs, I don’t post with them in the forums. It’s not difficult to do…UNTIL that person starts trying to hound me….addressing me in the forums with comments & questions. Well, actually, it is still easy to do…but I find myself asking WHY do people do that? Did they forget we had a conversation & agreed it would be best if we kept our distance? Why are they wasting their energy trying to engage me in conversation AGAIN? To me, the adult & responsible thing to do at that point is to keep your word & follow through with actions. Still yet, I stand accused of following someone around in the forums & baiting them. 
I try to get along with most everyone I encounter on here. And I do get along until something happens to cause otherwise. At those times, we just simply move on. I’ve done so with others & no problems. It’s nice….I still have a good time…they still have a good time.
I think some people simply read everything they see posted & have such delusions of grandeur that they honestly believe everything they see is about them. And herein lies the reason I thought of Sci & PMF today. They were endlessly ridiculed & targeted on this site. And now we are down two great bloggers that I and I know many others greatly enjoyed.
And life goes on.
I’ve posted several thoughts of mine here in question form. I find it necessary, due to site guidelines to always say these questions are simply hypothetical. I am not asking for you to answer them. I am accepting of your thoughts & comments on the matter if you care to share them in a friendly manner.
I’d also like to say this blog is not targeting anyone person in particular. However, if you’ve read it & think it’s about you, well, by all means, maybe it could be.
Copy & paste to friend: (Click inside box; Ctrl + C to copy; Ctrl + V to paste)
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read more blogs!
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loanwolfe
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Apr 9 @ 12:05AM
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Indeed missliss... it makes me think of a quote.. "the easiest thing in the world is to just leave someone alone." It's an aspect of human nature though... we learn early that we musn't covet our neighbor's hubby or stuff... most people can get that. It seems that in modern society... we also crave our neighbor's attention. We want an interactive audience... who will pay us attention.. clap when we do something great... cry when we look sad and squeal with delight when we do something magical.. even shriek when we startle them. We see how the world reacts to the concept of the youtube camera.. the reality tv show...instant fame and a role in the electronic media. But I guess what we're seeing among these latter day tv 'n movie stars is the craving for the live stage. The equivalent of performing before 500 people watching with rapt attention or hanging on our every word. Perhaps this is why the blog area is hard to define. One person stands up upon a soapbox and says.. "Hear Ye... Hear Ye... let us contemplate the birds!" and from this... others should say.. "yes.. I saw a bird like that one when I was a child on my grandpa's knee".. etc. But the attention seeker wants to get IN on that original blog post and restart it from the beginning with all eyes on me and the original blogger sitting beside the soapbox with rapt attention.
It's an interesting world... where we become fascinated with others who stand before us to make a presentation or to offer an opinion.. we become fascinated with their opinions... their unique persona... their physical beauty(perhaps their peaches 'n cream complexion) and from there its off to the races with individuals forming into groups and blog and forum wars turning into major conflicts. I think the way you handle conflict is the best way. If a person doesn't strike your fancy or gives you bad vibes.. they should be avoided and moved away from with one's own direction in life carrying one far away without the conflict being carried with it.
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TroutFishing
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Apr 9 @ 12:10AM
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most people have to "win" a discussion instead of
merely using another's comments as 'food for thought'.
all opinions are equal - some happen to match reality.
  
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signme
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Apr 9 @ 12:11AM
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Awwwwwwwww Miss, I miss the Tiny Tales, too. They were quite wonderful. I think there are some people who have such low self-esteem that it makes them feel better to attack others. They don't know any other way to get attention except for negativity. It's sad but it's life. Just do like you always do and ignore and move on. You know who your real friends are and they are the ones who are important. Not the ones who want to tear everyone down. We need to feel sorry for them because they have no friends and very possibly no life either.
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TallBlonde1
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Apr 9 @ 12:46AM
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Signme said exactly my thoughts, I second her comment.
I miss their blogs, too. Aside from being a talented shit-stirrer he was a published writer, btw. I'm sure the window lickers where happy but it was a loss for the rest of us.
You can look this way my friend, you've truly arrived on MD when someone thinks everything you say is about them. Congrats.
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Borty
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Apr 9 @ 1:55AM
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I remember a time in my life when I needed to be right at all costs. Even when it was obvious I was flogging a dead horse and I was absolutely wrong ..I would continue my obsessive ranting and eventually alienate those around me.
I have seem people on these sites rave on and on about the same topic day in and day out for months at a time. Anyone who disagrees is called a moron or lair . They are usually supported by a small group of cheerleaders but even they fade away and the blogger is left flogging their dead horse alone
You might say ...but Bort ...don't you write about panties all the time?
Yes I do ...but I don't call people morons or liars becarse the don't like my panty blogs....I rest my case..  ..
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daisy315
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Apr 9 @ 5:45AM
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And that my dear Miss, is why I don't spend alot of time here anymore. I am tired of the whining by the same ones about the same percieved affront.
I miss Sci and PMF also.. 
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ColdinWisconsin
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Apr 9 @ 7:19AM
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Signme said exactly my thoughts, I second her comment.
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observed50
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Apr 9 @ 8:09AM
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It seems to me that the web allows the 'hidden' in us to be more public, and unfortunately, so often, the hidden that gets most pushed forward is the hidden of our anger, our fear, our profound sense of inadequacies in front of our history and future...and as a consequence, public space becomes, without certain moderation/facilitation, a space that one wants to avoid. Yes, some people discover their 'voice' on the web that has been hidden and lost for years, when they were able to come on this uncaring stage, a voice that expresses the gift of their life and the delicate nature of their perception. But far too often, we experience the 'little' in us.
The web provides a stage where people are without history, without voice, without the need to be physically present even in face, i.e., all sorts of anonymity. We all have had conversations in our life about what we would do differently if we thought no one knew us, or we could get away with stuff. The web is that place...from sexual exploration, to sexual orientation, to religious and political investigation, to this massive social identity buffet...the web allows by its very nature, people to express this 'hidden' self that is normally contained by the animal's social cues and learned constraints, as well as the shortage of social attention because their native 'skills' don't attract attention where they actually are physically interactive.
The cues of discomfort, of disbelief, of disdain and disgust...are all without social power and presence on the web. I can call you liar, whore, monkey-butt, bitch, skank, liberal, tree-hugger...all sorts of 'useful and insightful' things and from this distance, simply adorn myself with the applause of my resplendent herd in my head. In my head, at this distance, is the only social reality that is shaping my response because real people aren't standing around, shaking their head, running me out of town, kicking me in the balls, totally ignoring and isolating me, or shooting my dog for my being such a socially dislocated, dysfunctional person. In my head, they're thumping me on the back, cheering me on, telling me what a brilliant insightful person I am because I really showed you when I called ya a skank.
And if ya notice, for every whacko in the world, there is a herd that mingles with it. We so want to believe that no one else would think like this too, right? We'd love to believe that 'if only people could....' then add something like 'be made to see, feel, hear, understand,...blah blah blah"...but the critical element to that is 'be made to see.'
No one has that capacity to control another animal so that it 'sees and hears, comprehends' what its real impact is on the world. No one can make another hear its fear, see its dysfunction, understand its social toxicity. None of it. We can't be made to perceive and comprehend anything. Dumber than a brick, we insist on being a brick.
And consequently...we can get to the moon and produce a desktop computer that can process almost as well as the human mind. But in 10,000 years of human society, we've probably simply only figured out how to better record our ineffectiveness in living with one another. We're as ineffective, blind, deaf and dumb today, as we were 10,000 years ago. In that, is for me, one of the strongest arguments for evolution being a fluke, considering the endpoint of our stupidity is always violence, for it isn't always the 'strong' that survive...it's those most willing to use violence, be it psychological or physical.
We don't put people in silos with a key and a missile simply because that's a great place to store the things. We put them far away so the crew don't have to witness their impact on the lives of possibly millions of people. They sorta know...but it's in witness that social reality is most impactful, and shapes our behavior, because we know and understand pain on the other side when we really look. Governments can't afford actors who feel the pain of those acted upon...
Children cry when other's cry, they have such a challenge in separating themselves from other children's emotional space. We teach them to quit feeling it, and over time, we teach them the finesse of feeling it when this child hurts, but not that child. Now..in the web...is the high dysfunction of 'children' who learned to socially distance and not feel within their toxic environment of people not feeling the pain of this child. Now...in our toxic heads...we can climb on the web...and be surrounded by other toxic fear, pain, and suffering, and insist it's all about you... as a skank...you're the problem not me! 
I need only one other voice to nod in agreement...and in my vivid imagination of the stage...feel vindicated that my acidity is correct in its application...
ya skank!
I just had a conversation with a friend on Tuesday about understanding more and more why eastern monks have a historical path of isolating from the herds on moutains or in forest retreats. Because they know, they understand, that the nature of wounded human beings is not something we can do much about because it first requires people to want to walk a different path. As we all know too well, most human beings love to talk about this different path (e.g., giving up smoking, losing weight, getting in shape, getting control of their anger, etc.) and very few ever do more than a little exploration down the path of change. It's too much work to take better care of ourselves and our world, and frankly, in front of ourselves, we seldom believe we're capable of that change. We're so focused on ease and pleasure stimulus...change is just way too much work.
So if yer gonna stay and 'put out' on the web stage...ya need to be able to hear the voices of attack as the voices of brokenness and choose when you want to try and be an accurate mirror for their social debris, or not. Yes, it's harrassing and problematic, and if ya came here to pick flowers and smell the roses, it makes the meadow less inviting...
until ya just git used ta cow pies are always gonna be found in green pastures...
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newpatches
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Apr 9 @ 9:38AM
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Aw Missy....ya need to be more like me....just a no nonsense old b**ch....  I am willing to have a conversation with someone on a subject but when I quickly see that all they want is to be argumentative to the point of being obnoxious I simply have my last say and BLOCK them....
From the beginning of my venture into blogland there have always been people hollerig about "FREEDOM OF SPEECH"....they have the right to their say in MY blog comments. I say BULLS**T.
My blogs are the same as my home. It's sorta like renting my blog home from MD and as long as I follow MD's rules then I set my own rules as to what comes into MY home. People's freedom of speech ENDS when they come through my blog door. In my blog home..no different than my real home...I expect respect!
People may disagree with me but do it wisely and with respect. No one comes into my real home and blasts me or treats me shabbily. They will be quickly shown the sidewalk. Same here. I have no problem with deleting comments that are flaming or disrespectful...and blocking them from future commenting.
If everyone would do that...nip it in the bud....then there would be less flame wars. Those who get their jollies at creating flame wars would soon see that their efforts are futile and who knows....maybe they'll learn a thing or two... 
JMHO
Patches
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edthepoet
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Apr 9 @ 2:43PM
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Sci could write beautifully and PMF was a horrible write in all way possible, he was in attack mode in most all his blogs and wrote in Hillbilly verage,lol
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misschoos
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Apr 9 @ 4:56PM
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You only have to be innocent around her to be guilty, it really is that simple.
Frinstance, I only have to write a blog and knicker elastic sales go ballistic.
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beckyiv42000
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Apr 9 @ 10:31PM
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I miss them both terribly Sci for her beautiful turn of a phrase and PMF for his unerring wit .. both contributed so much to this site .... SCI and PMFFFFERRRRRRRR come baaaaaaaaack 
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blkfoot1954
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Apr 10 @ 4:23PM
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Missy
All that you wrote is so true.I don't think it will ever change.I miss SCI and PMF also.Tiny tales were the most wonderful stories ever.Pmf only attacked those who attacked him first,or those who thought he was attacking them.THey both wrote some awesome blogs.I miss them too.
Ya just have to consider the source most of the time.Just remember this is the internet and don't let them get to you.
Great blog 
HUgssssssssssssssssss
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maggiemae684
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Apr 12 @ 9:31AM
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Pmf only attacked those who attacked him first ....not true....he slammed me horrible in his first ever comms with me....and it was not in jest....it was actually beyond bullying....and part of the reason I rarely come on this site any more. While I miss reading Sci's blogs I am certainly ecstatic to see that PMF has left and truly hope he chooses to not return.
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ttomtarr
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Apr 12 @ 12:43PM
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he was in attack mode in most all his blogs and wrote in Hillbilly verage,lol
Aha ! A mystery solved. Thanks Ed.
When I first came to MD I was trolled on one of my first blogs by someone who confused hillbilly and southern dialects so badly, it was obvious he was really familiar with neither. He was mad at me over an Email I had sent to another member. Passing it around was a real show of class, no? It was the first and only real personal ugliness I have encountered here.
His attack was laced with personal threats of violence, and was neither humerous nor rational. It also lowered my newly forming opinion of the level of communication on MD. I answered him, and blocked him. I never heard of him again. Presumably he went hunting someone a bit less verbal to bully, maybe some sick old lady, or little kid.
I always wondered who the jerk was, and now I know.
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PullMyFinger
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Apr 14 @ 7:19PM
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Moooooo haaaaaaaaaaaaaa haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.....
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