I have been thinking about this for 3 months now...it seems to invaid my
mind.
If..I die...or when i die...will anyone here or anyplace on the
net..will every know?....
That is a big..NO.I know this..cause no one knows about...or how to
tell my friends that i am gone.
No one will ever tell anyone that i have died...so everyone will just
think that i just left them for good...and not be buds.
Yeah,i know what you're saying."you are not going to die yet."
Oh..yeah?...what the F makes you think that?!!Unless you spoke to anubis.
I haven't really told anyone...but...i live in both sides of my family
that has a terrible history of heart problems.EVERYONE has heart conditions.
Everything to anything.I KNOW it has been passed down to me.
I may not be a DOC...or have one.but my heart has been doing many wierd things.
It feels like i swallowed a fish at times..that is alive and flopping
around in my lungs and by my heart..and it makes me cough really hard.
Then i feel dizzy...and i can't breath...but i can suck in as
much air as i want.my lungs are fine...i think it's my heart.
I don't want a pitty party...F it!I like the feeling
of having a ticking time bomb...giving me a GIFT card to deaths home.
I DON'T WANT TO BE OLD,wrinkles,liver spots,not remembering
things...can't walk,don't have teeth..loosing hair...and all of that.
I was suppost to die when i was 16.I lived for a reason...
i have not found that out yet...but i feel as i'm close.Expecially now.
If i died before my turning...by my beloved brother..i would have
vanished...and well..just never will live on another life EVER.
I think that...the gods...must have seen the worries and
troubles...of that...and sent me here...but for other reasons too.
To learn many things.There is only one thing i need to learn,
prob..before i die from this life.that is..to learn to love myself and a lifemate.
Maybe it'll be better to do that...in my next life.
Because it does not exist for me here.I know it does not.
I died before..it is scarey..always will be..but it's not that bad.
And no...not {email address removed} is ruined for me on this planet anytime 4 or 3 years from now.
Don't ask me why..its a long story..and i wish to keep that
to myself.I want to be here a bit longer...but not past my age of 34 or 35.
Somthing is wrong with my system in this vessel.But..that
is just..and i guess..was planned.I still rather be taken out like a warrior...
You know...to fight for my living and my death.This is how
i want it really.But...to look at my entire life...i have fought..and lived.
Everyday and night...we are all mortals on our last breath,
that has a thousand ways to die...even by the smallest of things.
My next life shall be better.I have ones that love me...and take
care of my mind and heart.I shall never be broken...never be beatin'.
I shall live in smiles...and fight and kill anything that stands
in my way..or hurts me or anyone who makes my life worth living.
Everyone that i loved and cared about here has left me into
grim reapers arms.Only the bad remain.
No....no more.
And if it's possible...
I shall come and haunt you all...
to tell you if im dead or undead.  
Copy & paste to friend: (Click inside box; Ctrl + C to copy; Ctrl + V to paste)
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read more blogs!
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blue130160
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Apr 15 @ 9:54PM
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Just it it in a will 
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iglooo101
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Apr 15 @ 9:57PM
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You are still 29....
Anubis is not ready for you yet
Go and spend like 1 trillion years..then think of Anubis
Until then....think of something more .... happy....
Lots of men and women like to pay millions just to be 29 years old just like you
So, enjoy your time....
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Wing_Zero_75
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Apr 15 @ 10:16PM
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Hell permitting, my death will be televised. But thats all I can say
Larry
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Jacksonboy
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Apr 15 @ 10:37PM
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I DON'T WANT TO BE OLD,wrinkles,liver spots,not remembering
things...can't walk,don't have teeth..loosing hair...and all of that.
Hey wait a minute here, you have described me.  No one on here would know if I passed either but I am not worried about it. I am 58 now and I intend to be around another 30 or 40 years and then I am going out kicking and screaming.
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blue130160
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Apr 15 @ 10:45PM
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I still have my teeth and look 35
So live long and prosper..Oh ya there's a thing called sex..
Try it . You'll wont to live  
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Wing_Zero_75
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Apr 15 @ 10:56PM
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Sex is good, but I prefer the Great Contempt
"What is the greatest experience you can have? It is the hour of the great contempt. The hour in which your happiness, too, arouses your disgust, and even your reason and virtue.
The hour when you say, what matters my happiness? It is poverty and filth and wretched contentment. But my happiness ought to justify existence itself"
Written by Friedrich Nietzsche
Larry
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blue130160
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Apr 15 @ 11:00PM
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If that floats your boat watch out for pirates
I'm having sex on the beach. 
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Bdragon477
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Apr 15 @ 11:01PM
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blue,
Lol..what does sex got to do with anything here?
I've had it...its good...but not really that wonderfull.
To the rest,
LOL...you are all too funny.
Yes I'm 29...but like i said..my heart is not good,
and well...29 years here..on this planet is enough already.
It's good that most of you want to get old,
thats fine...decay after your age of 38...that when you stop
growing and start falling appart...slowly into your coffin.
the rest that i worry about,
is that...no one will know that i want to be
cremated...and all my stuff to be burned as well.
I want none of my greedy fam members to take
what is not theirs.
Bahhh...if i had a lawer..and money id put a will
up on myself.
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blue130160
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Apr 15 @ 11:46PM
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Your body can hold on and not fall a part... You got till your about 50 depending on genetics and how you take care of your body.
I still recommend safe sex 
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blue130160
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Apr 15 @ 11:46PM
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Your body can hold on and not fall a part... You got till your about 50 depending on genetics and how you take care of your body.
I still recommend safe sex
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DRACULA_VwV
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Apr 15 @ 11:47PM
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Come and haunt me? I'll show you things that you don't want to see, War demons that enter into the flesh just to kill, Then die fast in battle it's their free will, I gave a friend a gun when I was eighteen, Two years later he put that gun to his head, He turned his motherfvcken bedroom blood red, They die fast cause life is a bore, They'd rather die, Than live life with a whore, They load their guns and blow people away, Cause death to them is just another day, They have no fear of judgment day, They know the bible's bullshit anyway, They enter flesh just to kill, Cause death to them is their own freewill.
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Wing_Zero_75
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Apr 16 @ 8:37AM
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Blue, I tried safe sex once, but I just couldnt figure out the combination.  
Larry
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