Cat Fight posted 4/18/2009 12:52:19 PM | 3 kudos what's this?     report abuse tagged: humor, pets, cats

JackfromtheBox

Drama came to visit last night. Around midnight, Kat dragged a dead rabbit into the house that was as big as he was. He struggled with it to a far corner that he never goes near, probably so I would notice him with it.

I saw it. I rolled my eyes.

This was no small feat. Kat had to pull it through a small cat door, over planters, up a few steps, and through a door that I keep unlatched so he can push it open. God knows how far away he was when he killed it. God knows how much he had to fight.

Talk about excited! The energy was radiating out of him. His hair stood on end and he moved quickly about… like a lion. No. More like a panther. He’s black, you know. He was quite talkative. Animated.

I had to ask myself when was the last time I felt that good. I couldn’t remember. For a man, it would have to compare to a sexual conquest that seemed insurmountable during introductions. Defeating an opponent during an adrenaline rush of pure physical power is relegated to athletes, criminals, and police forces in this culture. The opposite feeling comes from getting your once every three year notice from the government to get your septic tank cleaned again.

I let him dwell in his hubris for a while, empowered him with petting and exemplary words, then picked up the rabbit to toss it back outside.

Kat grabbed it with his front legs, dug into the carpeting with his back legs, and started chattering at me. It was obvious that he was cursing and swearing at me. “Damn you! You mother-f***er! Don’t you dare touch my trophy! Son-of-a-bitch! Let goooooooo!” Half way across the room, I decided to let him keep it in the house. I’m such a pushover. No wonder I live alone.

So I laid in bed with the lights out, listening to the occasional sound of powerful teeth crunching through bone. I eventually fell asleep.

This morning Kat was still guarding it.

Maybe I’ll wait for him to step outside to use the bathroom.

Maybe he wants me to clean it for him because I know he hates fur in his mouth.

Maybe he wants to share it with me.

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