Radio WROK
Radio Free Talking Rock, Jawja
"We Rock Y'all's World"
This morning's editorial is brought you by Jeb Tankersley's Video Shop, Tanning Salon and Auto Title Pawn. Right now Jeb's auto lot is over-flowing with pickups that once belonged to construction contractors. Heck, he has more pickups than the auto dealers! That is the one's that are still in business. Come by and see the friendly folks at Jeb's to get cheap thrills from a movie, a case of melanoma on your private parts and a good deal on a pickup. That's Jeb's Super Video - Tanning & Title Pawn World . . .just out from town on the Sodom Hollow Highway.
ONE FLU OVER THE CUCKOO'S NEST
The newspapers in Mexico were running headlines about a strange flu epidemic in the State of Vera Cruz as early as April 5. How come we'uns here in the good ole U S of A didn't hear about it until last week? Did someone in that thar New World Order want tourists from Mexico the take the bug all over the world?
The Centers for Disease Control is scrambling to come up with a new name for this nasty flu bug that is enabling the media to sell more advertising. After they called it the Swine Flu, Moslem controlled countries around the world announced that all pigs in their country would be killed. They wrongly assumed that their citizens could catch the Swine Flu from pigs. Egypt has already carried out its pig executions.
Moslems are not allowed to eat pork so pigs are as rare in the Moslem world as women drivers, democracy and war heroes. However, some Moslem countries do have sizable Christian minorities, but with minimal political rights. Egypt's 10% Christian minority have depended on pork as a primary source of protein after the government three years ago banned their ownership of chickens. Guess the mullah's in Egypt figured that killing the Christian's pigs would make them thar selves look good to Allah, the Wise, Peaceful and Merciful.
The World Health Organization initially changed the name of the bug to the Swine-Asian-Avian Hybrid Flu. However, instantaneously, several mullah's around the Moslem world called for the quick execution of all birds and Asians, too. That wouldn't go down too well with lovers of birds and Chinese cuisiine. So now the WHO is calling the bug the Eye24U2 Flu Virus.
Station WROK has a better idea! Why not call it the Al Quaida-Taliban Flu? . . . and spread the world through the Middle East that Al Quaida and Taiban terrorists are all carriers of this mean little virus. Heck, our brave boys and gals in uniform could be home for the Fourth - eating barbecued pork ribs, brunswick stew and water melon with big smiles on their faces! We'd let the home folks in the Middle East take care of the problem.
Today's editorial was given by Assistant Station Manager, Sven Fjord. Our manager, Forrest Gump, Jr, has taken his dogs and womenz to the Smokies to hide out from the flu epidemic. Oh, he took his barbecue grill and fishing pole. too!
Remember . . . Fjord has a better idea!
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