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More marriages might survive if the partners realized that sometimes the better comes after the worse. ~Doug Larson
A wonderful woman and someone I have been blessed to "meet" even if only via the internet, sent me an awesome video..
It's all attitude and never drifting!!!!A couple walked into the lobby of the Mayo Clinic and spotted a piano. They've been married for 62 years and he'll be 90 this year.
To me, this video, was totally heartmelting. I know there will be those that watch it and think.. "yeah, OK, so they play the piano together and he and she look pretty good for their age", but see past those obvious things... see the work that went into this couple... together for 62 years!
I think the problem with a lot of the younger people that marry is no so much that they wake up one morning and DECIDE to divorce, not that they embrace the parting of minds, dreams, journeys and RUN toward splitting, but, and I know this is true, they DRIFT apart. Why? In my own mind, I think it is easy to allow that drifting because we don't notice how far out or apart we are until a signal goes off in our heads... we become pre-occupied, too busy, are spread too thin with other obligations, other ventures, other pursuits of happiness.
I am all for working for what dreams you share.. that is not the point. The point is to not expand those dreams to the point that obtaining them will "drift" you off course of the one person that I am sure you felt made your world so much better than not having them in your world. If we feel this way going into the relationship, and know in our heart of hearts that this person is our "best friend", what happened? How did it become that "this person, this best friend" no longer wears the same title, no longer fits that same bill, no longer fills our wants? I believe that we work so hard at other things, some of them material, some of them fraternal (friends, etc.) that the one person we should make time for and really sit and listen and understand that though we feel this is the one person we adore, there will be differences of opinions, there will be disagreements, but don't we owe it to the relationship, to the promise we made each other to really devote as much time and values as we do to our jobs, our desire for material things in life?
I lost two brothers in the course of my lifetime, and countless friends and other family members.. some of them, I was / am guilty of doing that very same thing with.. "not today, I have to ______________", "after I get this _______________ done, we will do that." I've learned the hard way, sometimes life tosses dog doo at you.. you are NEVER guaranteed a tomorrow... it is work to make the time to spend with the person(s) that makes you laugh, it is work to take the 1/2 hour every other day to call and make sure they are OK, it is work to sit and discuss differences without taking them personally.
My heart aches.. for times I cannot call back and "do over", for all the tomorrows that I promised that will never be, for all the things I HAD to do right here and right now that really didn't hold my life at the end of it. I wish I had the insight I am learning these past years when I was a younger gal... not that I have that many regrets, but I do have some and would love if they never happened at all... I have learned, but I have also lost.
If, no, better when .. you find this next best friend that you are hoping for in life, understand that it will require work, understand that you are not always right, understand that there will be hurts and bad choices, but in the end, the joy and happiness far outweigh all those doggie doo situations.
Peace out .. hold on.. the ride is so worth it.
and for gramps... Czech Lawyer
A lawyer and his Czech friend were camping in a backwoods section of Montana. One morning, the two went out to pick berries for their breakfast. They went gathering berries in tremendous quantities, along came two huge bears, a male and a female. The lawyer, seeing the two bears, immediately dashed for cover. His friend, though, wasn't so lucky, and the male bear reached him and swallowed him whole.
The lawyer ran back to his Mercedes, tore into town as fast as he could, and got the local sheriff. The sheriff grabbed his shotgun and dashed back to the berry patch with the lawyer. Sure enough, the two bears were still there.
"He's in THAT one!" cried the lawyer, pointing to the male, while visions of lawsuits from his friend's family danced in his head. He just had to save his friend. The sheriff looked at the bears, and without batting an eye, leveled his gun, took careful aim, and shot the female. "What did you do that for!" exclaimed the lawyer, "I said he was in the other!"
"Exactly," replied the sheriff. "Would YOU believe a lawyer who told you the Czech was in the male?"
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