Why Men Love Bitches posted 6/13/2009 7:54:48 AM | 3 kudos what's this?     report abuse tagged: women, men, dating, rules

dizzydoll

A favorite book is coming to an end, so rummaging through the box for another I came across this one, very amusing and excellent advice here too.

Why Men Love Bitches by Sherry Argov

Anyway glancing through the bookmarks I saw this excerpt:
Here are some of them.

Attraction Principal # 47

You jump through hoops any time you repeatedly make it very obvious you’re giving your “all”

* Don’t talk for hours on the phone before your first date. Joke around. Be sassy. Make your plans or arrangement to meet and then politely end the conversation.

* Don’t tell him who you were in a “past life”, or what you plan to come back as in your next one (unless it’s a joke). He’ll think your cheese is sliding off the cracker.

* In the beginning, avoid seeing him more than one night in a row. Start out seeing him one to two nights a week.

* Don’t pout or whimper when he doesn’t call. You have to make him wonder every now and then about what you’re doing when you’re not with him. When you regulate the timing, it keeps him wanting and it charges his batteries.

* If he takes you to a nice restaurant, don’t order a celery stick “with oil and vinegar on the side”, and then continue to nibble off his plate like a humming bird. Don’t be so nervous or concerned with impressing him with your table etiquette. Have an appetite for enjoying life.

* Don’t disclose over your first dinner what you’re “working through” from childhood.

* Don’t try to fix his flaws either. I know one women who bought a man the book Tuesdays with Morrie. She thought the book would help him with his workaholism. Too much psychological analysis comes across too sappy.

* Don’t accompany him when he goes out with his friends. You don’t want to be one of the “boys”.

* Don’t do any slow drive-bys with your headlights turned off to see if he’s at home. And no high-speed flybys, either.

* If he calls you and asks you to come over late at night after he’s been out the his friends, don’t happily go skipping over, kicking your heels together like Julie Andrews in The Sound of Music.

* Don’t date someone who has addictions of any kind, hoping to “help” him by going to AA meetings with him. Let him work out his own stuff. If he can’t treat himself well, he’ll never treat you well.

* Never call more than once in a row, even if his machine (or voicemail) cuts you short. Don’t leave long mushy messages. Keep the message friendly, but short and sweet.

* Don’t email more than once in a row or send long emails about “feelings”, “issues”, and what you “need” that you aren’t getting. If he sends you and email, don’t respond within 30 seconds each and every time.

* Don’t stop eating, sleeping, or exercising. Keep your routine. If he wants to spend more time with you than you can comfortably give, invite him to join you in one of your activities - like a walk with your dog or going for a weekend bike ride.

* Avoid last-minute dates because you “miss him”.

* Don’t walk in the door, check your messages, and call him right back. Settle in, take a bath or shower, eat dinner and relax. Move to your own rhythm, and then call him back. He has to know you have a life … every day.

* If you’re on the phone and you get another call that beeps through, don’t say “stay right there. Don’t hang up! Whoever it is, I’ll get rid of him!” When you do come back on the line, don’t always be so quick to report the identity of the other caller. “That was the vet. Tigger had an earache”.

* Don’t regularly travel 40 minutes in traffic to see him. Look at a map and take note: Its just as far from his house to your house as it is from your house to his. So don’t feel guilty about having him come your way.

* Don’t ask for affection. Don’t coax affection out of him. Don’t give affection when he isn’t being affectionate. If he’s ignoring you, don’t try harder. “Honey, can I give you a backrub?”.

* Don’t be a slave to the phone. Don’t play his voice message back to your girlfriends to dissect every detail of your situation. Pay attention to the big picture. Does he add to your life as a whole, and do you feel good after he’s been around? (If not, “fast forward” the message and hit “delete“.)

* Don’t memorize his phone number in the 1st week of dating or call him all the time and hang up. He’ll know its you.

* If he’s in a bad mood, make an excuse and then go do your own thing.

* Above all, make every concerted effort to stay focused on your life. That’s how you stay sassy in his eyes.

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