Today is one of those blue days for me... almost a feeling of forboding....one of those rare days that I just don't like ME very much. MOST of the time I do, and I am sure we all feel that way at times.
When it happens, everything around me seems more gloomy then usual. People try to say the right things to make me feel better, but it rarely helps, although I DO appreciate them caring enough to try. Even though there seem to be no words to make it better, there seems to be cases where the slightest words can and often do make it worse.
Then there is that ever so slight fear, that things wont get better. That somehow what I thought were strides forward were only illusions. Mind you, I normally only feel this way for a day or so at a time, but I wonder where it comes from.
I like to think some of it may be the heat,... or maybe I have not been sleeping as well as I thought,...or probably the real reason is that I have ALWAYS been too hard on myself when I feel that I don't "live up" to someone elses "ideal" of me, or I don't live up to my own. I feel like I am always trying to prove something... and for what? for who? When will it end?
Why do we put such pressure on ourselves? Why can't we always feel good enough? Is it that some of us were brainwashed as a child in to believing that we were NOT good enough for anything or anyone?? Maybe there was a memory, even unconciously.. today... that brought all that back... 
I don't know... I just know that tomorrow cannot come fast enough.... and I must wake up once again with a smile on my face... and a hug for that inner child that never was good enough..... 
Thanks for being my "sounding board" and my virtual " journal." 
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Snappygoddess
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Jul 22 @ 6:55AM
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I think we all feel that way sometimes. Personally, I look at it as a time out from not having to be cheerful....some days you just don't want to smile, be polite or even talk to anyone. Those are the days I try to stay in a good book or movie and stay away from others.
Look at it this way.. at least you don't stay in that mode.. some folks never get out of it.. day after day. I couldn't imagine living like that all the time. Life has way to much to offer 
Thanks for sharing...hope the day gets better for ya 
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Fayvorite
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Jul 22 @ 8:13AM
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Maybe a full moon, processed foods, like you said an unconcious memory triggered. Luckily it doesn't hang around long so just hang in there until it passes. Maybe a bubblebath and good nights sleep will wash it away.
Hang in the puddytat.
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luneib
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Jul 22 @ 10:10AM
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I know how you feel, I'm hard on myself as well. We should just let things slide, not worry so much about what others think. You can't change the way people think, but we can change the way that we think. 
I hope you will feel a bit better as the day moves on. Here's some hugs for you (((Hugs))). Treat yourself to something special because, well....you are special. 
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luneib
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Jul 22 @ 10:16AM
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Oh yeah and lay off anything with refined sugar, sugar can make people feel depressed.
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mystery2u888
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Jul 22 @ 4:23PM
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It will get better, there are days that we can feel alone and stuff and feel like we can't get out.......and then we are on overload ........but we manage to get thru it....... big hugs
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1frantastic
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Jul 22 @ 6:16PM
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 yep syb....I am fighting a bad case of depression all over again....my "friend" abandoned me....even when he had been there for me when Mama was dying... I can't get things done...sleeping again 10 to 14 hrs a day....I don't have the "want to"...and most of all I hear the record playing in my mind"If you'd ONLY.....and here I am rebelling against that record!!!! Still....
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summerbreeze916
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Jul 22 @ 9:14PM
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Hope things are better for you, Syb........
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gunn12fan
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Jul 22 @ 10:48PM
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I m sorry your feelin that way but always know were here for you
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