It is going to take a long time for me to let go of the dream I had and realize how deceived I actually was.....
My best "friend" turned on me...a complete 360! (with the help of some of his "women advisors") I thought he hung the moon....even though he convinced many of his admirers he was a wounded warrior and just spake Ole English prose to charm ONLY them...(while all knew of his charms...each thought she was...er...more special....)
We had a platonic relationship...even though stating the word "relationship" in any sentence concerning the two of us made him shiver....Why? Because he had been advised I was wayyyy too old to have any kind of "relationship"...that I was more like a grandmother......  ...yea right!!!
Many con-artists NEED to have a confidant! They MUST have someone close to them to tell their deepest feelings to...and share....to feel ...er..human....to be "forgiven" for their misconceived shortcomings....and the strange thing is...this is actually the bait that hooks MANY of US to them! They play the part of the victim...while all the while using women to advance their own NEEDS,,(whatever they shall be at the moment!)
I fell for this "player"....spoke for hours upon hours...on phone...on instant message...with e-mails.....and finally in person! Our first "meet-n-greet" came when he was transit from Arizona thru Texas (with job interview determining length of stay here) before going to other job possibilities in Louisiana...
He is sooooo slick...he always gets a femme de jour in town he is going to go TO before going there....hummmmn ....wonder why??? duh!
One of his profiles speaks of this very thing...about his location being ...transit...and changes according to his next...er...job???
I do want to give him credit and it is this very thing that still endears him to me...he stood by me when my mama was dying and I had to battle hospital/nursing home staff and my own family (I was being "best utilized" by being with mama 24/7 in chair or floor next to her)...He is a "fixer"...a male who thinks he has the right advice to tell you how to do things in a better way than you are doing....(He actually has several of his "committee" depending on his "advice" and ...er.."friendship"...)He will speak to one of us for hours...all the time interjecting how another "committee member" is failing at her current objective...and getting your opinion....usually to see if you agree with his solution....and making you feel special because you are NOT her...
How do I know all of this??? I was one of the committee...matter of fact was the Number ONE for a longgggg time...till I fell from grace of his lordship....
I was the confidant for TWO of his relationships with women he temporarily thought was going to be "the one".....until they became human and were not up to his strict requirements of his "perfect wife material"....He had his DREAMS.....
Funny thing was...his dream was so compatabile with mine...it was like we were in the same "creation" or had been before and were reunited...EXCEPT.......my age threw him for a loop! He could never get past that! Mostly due to the committee...and one person in particular... who harped on my being 15 yrs older than he was....although he had no problem going 15 or more younger than him...mainly because he remembered when he was younger and the women he was with were young also...he did have the PROBLEM of realizing he was OLD NOW!!! He looks as if he and I are only a few yrs apart...and which direction is not clear either....
It is sooooo funny....comical actually...how men tend to "remember the old days" and not look in the mirror to see the "now days"....lol their belly that hangs over the belt....sagging upper arms that used to be their pride and strength to boot!
Their receding hairline that they do "comb-overs" or "pony-tails", "manly dye" to cover up the aging grey....well some of them anyway....let the facial hair grow to give them a "distinguishing" appeal.....like unto a rock, country, blues, or other entertainer who is NOT clean shaven...and the biggie......VIAGRA! or refusal to even entertain the idea because it is the problem of the women....they are not young enough to stimulate them....oh really? Maybe the younger women don't know any better...or if they do....don't want what comes with the whole picture once they see it in person...in the LIGHT!
A dreamy voice covers a multitude of sins....and my "friend" did/does? have a wonderful voice that sounds like Waylon, or Willie, or other crooners that can turn a woman's ear and heart....his sound still reverbrates in my heart and soul....and when I close my eyes...I can still recall those eyes looking into mine as he crooned his soothing notes with words I thought he meant for me....WRONG!
It was wonderful being his navigator traveling up the East coast, taking pictures of the changing colors, listening to him croon to me, tell me more stories, bunking together at the end of the day, living the life of "on the road"...wanting to have a "quality of life" with stationary housing, a garden, full-size stereo sound system with no neighbors to worry about....complete freedom...no one "bossing" your time to meet someone's deadlines...
After our trip ended, and six-months later...he was coming to Texas to have that "quality of life"...we were to be "housemates"...sharing....I desparately needed help to fix-up my house because I could no longer do what I did 30 yrs ago with my rent houses...I knew what to do...just no longer had the balance to climb ladders, strength to carry furniture from room- to- room, and other things I used to do alone. He was out of a job and was out of money to go anywhere searching (he said)...so I advanced him $1500 so he could move his truck, motorcycle, Airstream, all belongings out of storage, and begin a new life here in West Texas. This was a boom-area in the oil-field and tanker drivers, or prison guards, or computer techs, or even small machine repair (our one man had retired for good)....all occupations he was qualified for and said he wanted to have his own business....He could help me temporarily till he found a job and so I would help him with salary to cover mininum bills till he did get employment other than me.
Sounded like a win-win plan to me! And ...thing is...he agreed!
Then...it happened! He was to have a room of his own...BUT he had to move the stored furniture out of there and refurbish with different items(I had them) but he didn't do that right away. He was to move his AS to the back of my property so we could stay in it (bunk beds)and work on the house with out living in disarray of repairing problems.But he didn't do that either....He moved truck and AS under my front carport and then only my truck was available for transportation....(He didn't unload his motorcycle either so he could at least have it to drive locally till he got job...) What happened??? HE conferred with his commi
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