SENIOR CITIZEN

a distraught senior citizen phoned her doctors office, is it true she wanted to know? that the medicine you prescribed has to be taken for the rest of my life
yes im afraid so the doctor told her

there was a moment of silence before the senior lady replied im wondering then just how serious is my condition because this prescription is marked

NO REFILLS


AGING

eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying about youre age
and start bragging about it



the older we get the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for


some people try to turn back their odometers, not me
i want people to know why i look this way ive traveled a long way
and some of the roads werent paved


when you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to youth
think of algebra


you know you getting old when everything
either dries up or leaks


one of many things no one tells you about aging
is that it is such a nice change
from being young


ah being young is beautiful
but being old is comfortable


first you forget names
then you forget faces
then you forget to pull up your zipper
its worse when you forget to pull it down


long ago when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks
it was called witchcraft
today its called golf