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A bald man with a wooden leg gets invited to a Halloween party.
He doesn't know what costume to wear
to hide his head and his leg so he writes to a
costume company to explain his problem.
A few days later he received a parcel with the following note:
Dear Sir,
Please find enclosed a pirate's outfit.
The spotted handkerchief will cover your bald head
and, with your wooden leg, you will be just right as a pirate.
Very truly yours,
Acme Costume Co.
The man thinks this is terrible because they have
emphasized his wooden leg and so he writes a letter of complaint.
A week goes by and he receives another parcel and a note, which says:
Dear Sir,
Please find enclosed a monk's costume.
The long robe will cover your wooden leg
and, with your bald head, you will really look the part.
Very truly yours,
Acme Costume Co.
Now the man is really upset since they have
gone from emphasizing his wooden leg to emphasizing
his bald head so again he writes the
company another nasty letter of complaint.
The next day he gets a small parcel and a note, which reads:
Dear Sir,
We have TRIED our very BEST.
Please find enclosed a bottle of molasses
and a bag of crushed nuts.
Pour the molasses over your bald head,
pat on crushed nuts,
stick your wooden leg up your ass and go
as a caramel apple.
Very truly yours,
Acme Costume Co.
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