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WHEN YOU FALL IN LOVE...IT IS TEMPORARY MADNESS!

posted 10/11/2009 3:32:02 AM |

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musicianfriend

I read this somewhere a long time ago..I wrote it down..but cant remember where it came from..I thought it made alot of sense..

When we choose a mate...perhaps it would be good to think about what we will do after we cannot run around anymore..and we become a bit more sedintary....Will we still have things to talk about? Will we still laugh with each other? What will we do together or talk about when were old....

If you cant think of anything.....perhaps someone else would work better...
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~.

When you fall in love, it is a temporary madness..It erupts like an earthquake and then it subsides....

And when it subsides, you have to make a decision...

You have to work out whether your roots are so entwined together that is inconceivable that you should ever part...

This is what love is....
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

What love is not:

It is not Breathlessness.....

It is not excitement.....

It is not the desire to mate every second of the day......

It is not lying awake at night imagining that he is kissing every part of your body...

NO........................I tell you some truths.....

It is just being in love which any of us can convience ourselves we are.....

Love is whats left over.. When being in love has burned away....

Doesn't sound very exciting does it....

But it is....
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bring in the wood before she asks for it....

If she is cold..put a sweater around her shoulders.....

Bring her a flower often.....

Tell her shes beautiful....

Make him his favorite food....

Greet him when he comes home from work....

Get up with him and make him coffee...

Compliment him on his looks...body..whatever....

Love dies when you allow the fire to go out............

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dizzydoll	Oct 11 @ 4:28AM
	Love dies when you allow the fire to go out............ yup doll, couldnt agree with you more have a c%l day

oct_cat	Oct 11 @ 8:20AM
	I wonder if this could be why those who rush to live together or marry after only a very short time don't last real long in the relationship??

musicianfriend	Oct 11 @ 10:36AM
	I wonder if this could be why those who rush to live together or marry after only a very short time don't last real long in the relationship?? By Jove...I think you've got it! My motto is this....when all the heat is gone...what is left...will you have anything to talk about? Laugh about?... I think also that because of rushing a relationship....you will overlook their flaws....and that will bite you in the butt later for sure... The rule of thumb is to date for 1 1/2 to 2 years...by then...their agent representative is gone..and you are seeing the real deal... What you mentioned, 'the rush', is what I attribute the many divorces to...they didnt really get to know each other first...

oct_cat	Oct 11 @ 10:59AM
	The rule of thumb is to date for 1 1/2 to 2 years My daughter, who is 15, was just asking me last week how long people should date before getting married. I told her some people get married 6 months or less after first meeting, but said I'd consider anything under at least a year to be too short. I think some people rush because their "body clock" is ticking away & they don't want to be 'ala carte' instead of 'part of a meal'. However, I've found for myself that as I get older (crap 47 yrs is just around the corner ), my focus is changed and there's not so much a rush as there is a sense of wanting to slow things down & enjoy the total experience.

musicianfriend	Oct 11 @ 11:05AM
	Love dies when you allow the fire to go out............ I think they call it taking your partner for granted.... I really dont understand that either.. If you are married..and especially if you have children....isnt it better to be in love...to make some effort.....so you may live happily the rest of your days... Yet..some choose to ignore each other...they never nurture the relationship.....and live in misery for the rest of their days...or perhaps even get divorced...thus destroying their little family....and I dont think people realize how much they have lost when they do this..until way later... Most people Ive talked to that cheated on their spouse...and then married their mistress/mister...are not so happy...the grass was greener at home..but they didnt realize it...they were always thinking there was something better somewhere else...This type of personality should be discovered in the dating process...someone who is never satisfied with what they have. A marriage is like flowers in a pot..you must water them..or they will die... My Dad....my brother...have wonderful marriages...They nurture the relationship...The men always build up the women...call them beautiful...tell them that they love them...alot....they cherish their women...and the women..they take good care of their husbands...they support them..do things for them that they know their husband will like...and when she does..he appreciates it... One thing I have noticed....about my aunts .....Stepmother....Sis in Law...they NEVER EVER EVER EVER talk crap about their men...They NEVER complain....nor do the men talk crap on the women...they always tell everyone how awsome their wives are.... I think its great how they are ...they live in the South....The southern folks seem to be more traditional in their beliefs...and in their lifestyles... I have seen that people fall in love...then fall out of love....then they can fall back in love again....IF they start to nurture their relationship.... But it seems that some think that just because you fell out of love...its over..and they give up...when in reality...its just that they have forgotten to FEED the relationship....They have allowed the fire to go out......but its not that hard to fall back in love...just light the fire again by...nurturing...appreciation...cherishing.... To many...during this phase have divorced... Where as in the past...and some in the present..choose to stick it out....and their love returns....family is still together...everyone wins.. I think this is why marriages were stronger in the past....they would ride out the storm..instead of just giving up...and looking elsewhere... For some people...they do not want to 'clean up the mess'...or have to apologize..or even admit anywrong doing...so they just move along...not considering what they and their children will have to endure... Stick it out...start to appreciate him...cherish her....and it will all come together... Many older couples I have talked to that stayed married for life have told me that many times they wanted to divorce...but they didnt..and they are very happy that they didnt do that to themselves...and their children... Because now...they all get to be together at holidays...picnics..and such...Its just never the same with out the original mother and father...It just isnt.. Divorce redistributes the wealth....and destroys futures.....Ever wonder why its been encouraged, accepted in our society...? Why movies encourage adultery, divorce...selfishness..instead of selflessness? The TV and movie industry is used for social engineering....Divorce weakens the people of a nation...Divide..and conquer..

musicianfriend	Oct 11 @ 11:29AM
	However, I've found for myself that as I get older (crap 47 yrs is just around the corner ), my focus is changed and there's not so much a rush as there is a sense of wanting to slow things down & enjoy the total experience 47? I wish I was 47...Im 55...and i agree...there is no rush at this age for sure...I think because we are so afraid of making a mistake ....and haveing to eeeewwwwww date again..I hate dating... I have been seeing a man for 2 years now....hes 8 years older than me..I have NEVER dated an older man..but hes quite unique...I have learned to not be exclusive with anyone unless there is a commitment...otherwise...we become to needy...and thats a turn off to men.....and thats the key right there...NEVER EVER be exclusive with anyone unless you have a commitment...otherwise..you will be miserable and feel trapped...and dating is how we find out what we really want anyway..by experiencing others.. ... Needless to say...I have dated others...he says he hasnt...but theres no commitment...but the funny thing is this....we have developed a deep friendship ...before an actual relationship...and I think I like it... We break up....and go back..then we break up ...and go back...lol...but we always end up together again...Perhaps we are suited for each other....Things are beginning to change abit...perhaps because I started dating others again..and now...hes the 'hunter'...lol Men like that...'the challenge' or fear of losing you.....this gives the man time to think about how much he needs you...if he is attached..he will fear losing you...if you never challenge him..he will stay in cruize mode...men do that ya know.... Dating others also helps you to see who you are compatable with...and it keeps your feminine spirit up..and thats attractive to healthy men... A confident woman. We both never want to have to go through a divorce again..so we are being extremely careful...I think our patience will be an asset to the relationship.. But by dating others...if things dont work...I wont be lonely...or depressed..because of my other male friends that I date....oh yes..you MUST be honest about your dating others...otherwise you will look like a sneak.. So this is my conclusion....because we have formed this intense friendship...and put the physical on hold for now...because sex confuses things for women more than for men...remember..men can have sex without feelings...I dont think we women are so good at that..lol......and what we are doing...is basically trying to make good decisions for our lives...decisions that will impact our lives in a very positive manner...forever...not just for a time..but forever.......... The cool thing is this...if we make it...we will still have a fresh and new relationship to look forward to....because of moving so slow....and carefully..and yes...putting sex on hold....... and hopefully..we will have built a very strong foundation to work with.. If we dont make it...we will always be close friends...Moving slow is a win win proposition..

ElmerFudd445	Oct 11 @ 4:53PM
	it is madness

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