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1st. 2nd. 3rd. Date Rule!

posted 10/28/2009 1:10:16 PM |
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  lovestobake

I am sure this applies to both genders, but; I haven't gone on romantic dates with guys, so I can not speak from experience. Though it was a get to know you internet thing, I believe the same reasoning would hold true as if it were a real world date. If I am told how bad the last guy treated her I immediately think judge Judy, this is here say, and may ask for his phone number. If I do not ask for a phone number, and she continues with what I call war stories, I start to think bitter person here. At this point I may say to her for every war story you have there is a guy with his story or stories. What is pea brains point here, if your heart is not open to romance, if you think many, most or all of the opposite sex are jerks, please do not waste others time. I know misery loves company, but; be the good person you believe you are, and do not spread it.

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Comments:
Blaiserboy

Oct 28 @ 1:40PM  
Sometimes we confuse the ideal relationship with the garbage from our past.... It is probably good to treat all others well so that we can receive same in future.

I think that there is a relative equation in life..... 'Give Good to Get Good', I wonder if sometimes people forget this.
ttomtarr

Oct 28 @ 1:55PM  
The main question is this:

"Is she tring to end the list of bad guys, or add one to it?"
bluewind37

Oct 28 @ 1:56PM  
I think it's safe to say everyone has had at least that one "bad" relationship. To me, it's not fair to take that and use it to compare to others we may meet in the future. People are unique, and it's not fair to them to judge them before knowing them.
edthepoet

Oct 28 @ 2:00PM  
The past needs to be left at home, what good can come from sharing a war story about your ex.

Also the detective who think they have know everything on the first date.
sweetxy

Oct 28 @ 2:25PM  
I don't believe all men could be all jerks but what i afraid even to respond to new guys who like to get to know me is if they are guys or not.I used to be very open but still i can make some fuss.

I don't afraid of real Man who wants to get to know me but the fake ones on here ,
How to know if the person is real ,not anybody else like to make fun of me as I have seen some troubles recently.just recently!,
since something happen on blog about tracking someone personal life it scares me away from dating , I wish I could go back to my old dates but some shows no thrill,I can't ask for another date if a man would not ask me ,hard to understand ..and some just too much I rather gave up than trying .
I don't know what rule should be applied to me
dizzydoll

Oct 28 @ 3:14PM  
Strata2007

Oct 28 @ 4:56PM  
Oh the "war stories" are great defense mechanisms when you need to get rid of a guy. You turn on the heat when he doesn't want to flake off

Most guys are the initiators of their torment - they always ask why you broke up with ex or what happened in last relationship. If a guy doesn't want the story he should not ask

It's all bad mojo. The past may have been just learning experiences.
The person in front of you is the person you should find out about. Keep questions based on present or recent? Does/ Can anyone do that?
summerbreeze916

Oct 28 @ 5:50PM  
Excellent blog. We've all had our bad experiences, but those bad experiences can hopefully teach us something about our futures. These things are best left in the past, unless asked about. They are yesterday's history and today's bittersweet memories. I would not hold a man accountable for what another has done to me, no more than I would want to be blamed for another woman hurting some guy. We are all individuals. The only mistakes we make ourselves is that we tend to fall over and over for the same types.

Again, lovestobake.....great blog.
POPO

Oct 28 @ 8:09PM  
Bake what up bro.....

Ahhhh yes the old my ex or exs were all jerks or nut bags... well all though there maybe some truth to that, okay allot of truth to that... The bottem line is we picked em.. Most of didn't fall for or marry a crazy person, atleast that we could see.. Some saw the red flags and thought maybe they could change them.. That never works.. I think the key is two people just being honest and both being able to take a open honest look at each other and decided if they can live with the things they don't like and love more the things they do like. Be able to look at each other and say were not perfect, but we seem perfect for each other.

It's one thing to fill someone in on the things of the past and why it didn't work, I think that's normal, but to spend all their time bashing or trashing someone is not very becoming and should be a sign that should it not work with you, your the next ex on the list of people he/she will talk about.. I understand bitter, hurt and emotional pain, as we all have experienced it a time or two. But that's not what our love is about, and were not pedding how hurt we are, but rather hoping others will see the good in us, not the baggage, from relationships gone by, we all should be very smart and know exactly what blends and what ends it for us.I think if more peeps spent their time talking about what they like and how they think love should be rather then focusing on how bad it has been, we might attrack better quality of people to us.

I don't throw rocks at my use to be or use to be's, not because I'm such a great guy..(I am) but let's not dweel on me But I've learned over the years, that no matter how hard I tried to make it work, I also let down and failed the relationship somewhere along the way, people can get complacent and forget to keep dating and showing each other their love and appreciation, we never realize how good we had it or how much we miss it until it's gone. (I'm not speaking for those who were abused or crimes against the relationship committed) Just in genral where two folks tried and failed to make it work, usually someone drop the ball and they both stop talking about it, then drifted apart. if I'm really interested in someone I want to know how he lost you and where he went wrong, so I don't repeat history, but I don't want to live his past, I'm not him nor did I do the things he did.Each relationship should stand on it's own merits

Anyway just my dos centavos
Popo
butterfly943

Oct 28 @ 8:58PM  
That ex bashing is the one thing I dont like in a Man or hear from a Woman either
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