I once had a girlfriend who's five year old daughter was addicted to SpongeBob. We used to play and I would be assigned different roles. If I was lucky I got to be Patrick, or my favorite, Gary. More often than not I'd get stuck with Squidward....
I realize now that I am really a Plankton at heart... a small, short-sighted, egomaniac, obsessed with power and married to my computer.....Yes, married.
I'm lobbying congress to approve man-computer marriages and I've even petitioned the Pope (via email) to give his Papal Blessing to the Union of any human and their chosen interactive device.
Yes, gay marriage was only the beginnig. Soon people will begin to marry their pets, their cars, and even God Forbid, their TV sets.
After all, we spend an inordinate amount of time with them. More than with most spouses and significant others. We pamper them , talk to them, and even in some cases, have sex with them.
You can beat the shit outta your tv set and no one will care or call the cops.
Or you might be arrested for domestic abuse after kicking the tires on your car...
Remember the tv show "My Mother the Car"? If you do, you are really old, like me.
It had weird, incestuous overtones, obvious to even a small child, as I was.
No wonder I don't have time for dating! I'm dating my stuff!!!
Copy & paste to friend: (Click inside box; Ctrl + C to copy; Ctrl + V to paste)
|
|
read more blogs!
Blogs by Gary51hwd:
|
|
| Call me Plankton..I'm dating my stuff... |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|