Well, I am very happy, today  Finally got my new glasses! (yes, I wear glasses!) And I got them just in time, too!
You see, only twelve more days 'till I leave on my trip. Really lookin' forward to going up this 10,000 foot mountain on the Island of Maui. I don't remember the name of that mountain, but it's the one with that space observatory at the top. The Road Atlases seem to like to refer to it as Red Mountain, but the real name is probably some Hawai'ian name that I don't know. And I am really looking forward to seeing the view from the top and the scenery on the way up... BUT there was just one slight problem.... How could I ever hope to get a good view, trying to see out of the hideously scratched up lenses  of the old glasses I was wearing up until this morning?
Well, those old glasses have quite a colorful - and bumpy - history. They were almost destroyed in 2001, when they were trampled upon, in a moshing pit, at a Bonzai concert in 2001, in downtown Miami. They were accidentally knocked off my face, as the body of a fellow mosher was being passed over my head. Her a** literally hit my face without warning and the next thing you know, my glasses are gone and no where to be found. 
Don't ask me how I could be crazy enough to go into a moshing pit WITHOUT TAKING MY GLASSES OFF!  Like DOY! How DENSE is that!!  Going into a mosh pit is crazy all by itself... but hey, I'm a pretty crazy dude 
Anyway, I gave up the search for my glasses, when I was handed a completely unrecognizable mangled tangle of wire, that I presumed, were them.  They sure did a good job on these; they were total squished. However, turned out those were somebody else's. Poor fella. Somehow, though, as if by some miracle, my glasses were recovered and passed over to me, amazingly, relatively intact! They survived, but every since, they sat crookedly on my face, the left side leaning slightly higher.
Then about three years ago, the plastic nose hinges fell off, and the metal hinge screws, on which the nose pieces were attached, now pressed into the bridge of my nose, like sharp needles, causing significant discomfort - that is, until I decided to saw the damn hinge screws off with a butcher knife. Now, whenever I wore the glasses, the rims of the glasses themselves, rested on the bridge of my nose, with the nose pieces missing, of course... but, also, of course, without any stupid metal hinge screws pressing into my nose, either, like a couple of darts... ahhh, that felt much better...:)
And then a few weeks ago, I made the mistake of cleaning my lenses with a damp paper towel, scratching the lenses really badly. That was the last straw. I could take crooked glasses with no nose pieces, but what good are glasses if you can't even see out of them? Let's face it. I needed new glasses badly. The ones I was wearing were seven years old, so I guess it was about time. Anyway, I like my new glasses. They're just my style! 
- the Fuchian 
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