As I walked into CP's office for the first time, the sky was overcast and the air was heavy. It was one of those days in Houston with a 60% chance of showers -- which in Houston means it will rain 60% of the day.
I was going to CP to access more of my feminine. I was very in touch with my masculine -- independent, capable of meeting and surmounting challenges, logical, a problem solver, giving -- but not so in touch with feelings, nurturing, interdependence, receiving... That message I'd received in the Gila Wilderness about unity -- I was interpreting that as finding a personal unity for myself in my masculine/feminine. CP was a psychotherapist.
We spent the first part of the hour with my explaining where I wanted to go in the therapy. Then she led me into a guided meditation. I had done a little work with others in hypnosis and guided meditation, so I was very cooperative.
It started off with relaxation, focussing on breath and which each breath going into deeper relaxation and then counting down from ten to one and going deeper and deeper. My image for going into deeper relaxation was the escalator at Lord and Taylor, where I'd worked years before. As I stepped off the escalator and CP guided me to a place of beauty where I could relax and feel comfortable, I found myself in a field of pink clover under a large tree. I sat there in my white dress with the skirt spread around me drinking in the beauty. Outside CP's office, I could hear the rain start to fall.
"A person approaches you," CP said. I looked up and saw that it was Christ aproaching me. He came through the pink clover and sat down beside me. He enveloped me in his arms and I felt greater love than ever I had experienced in my life. As he held me, The lonliness of childhood and teen years was washed in his love and a great emptiness held over many years was filled. I heard the rain outside the office flooding down. My tears were released in a flood to match that outside.
"This person will tell you something you need to know," CP went on. Christ said to me, "You already have everything you need. It is within you. My Spirit dwells within you."
CP went on, "It is time now for you visitor to leave. The person gives you a gift and then will say goodbye and depart." Christ pressed something into my hand and with a final embrace, he left. I could feel rough edges dig into my palm from his gift, but did not look down to see what he had left until he was no longer in sight. Then I opened my hand and saw a beautiful stone that I knew to be a desert rose with three "blossoms".
When I opened my eyes, the rain outside the office had stopped.
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