Once she sat back down in the chair illuminated only by the light from the computer screen, Justine happened to look up in the window and was frikken frightened to the point of pissing her pants! She ducked under the desk.. “who the hell was that grotesque individual” looking at her thru the window, she pondered. She peeked over the desk and the face was gone. Slowly, she rose from under the desk and walked closer to the window.. “eeeeeee, there it is again” she screamed. She began slowly backing away and as she did, she noticed the grotesque being was also backing away.. She raised her hand, and so did that figure in the window. Justine was blown away .. “like duh, it’s only my reflection”, she said and sat her effin ass back down (thinking she had to get some new makeup pronto).
Joining her hands together and crackling her knuckles, she began to log in under the stealth mode… when ta dum… another Kodak moment! “Why go incognito? I won’t be able to make any sort of comments or write emails that will scorch their wussy asses to a char iffen I do that!” “Think, think, think” she scolded herself.
“Muuuuuu aaaaaahhhhhhhh hhaaaaaa haaaaaa” she cried, twirling a ghostly handlebar moustache…”by jove, I have it”…”I will create a pseudo profile”… “why, I can cut and put up a picture of some hot babe from a Victoria’s Secret or a Fredericks’ of Hollywood catalog…and call myself something all cutsie… shall we say.. “Mscommandoqueen”.
“Oh, this is sooooo wonderfully evil” .. she said as she threw back her 3rd brewskie…”let’s get to setting the keys schhmmmmmoookkkkkinnnn”. She started her newest baddest ass profile.. And for the heading she simply entitled it.. “I want some sexy man to kiss all over”… she smiled that evil grin she was famous for and set out to make a profile of nuttin but sea pickles and fudge nuggets (and for those legally blonde or otherwise challenged.. Ah, come on… ya knows I luvs ya…..I be meanin chit!!). She had cut a picture of a 19-something or other from Fredericks dressed in a corset so tight it made those puppies of hers stand up and bark complete with whip (yeah baby)! She opened up the photo shop and pasted it in her bedroom standing next to her bed.. “damn, I wish I coulda found one that had that smile and the deer in the headlight look too.”… *sigh*
“Now for the description of who I am” she whispered….
TBC…….
You know that ad for Pedigree Dog Food that I mentioned a couple of weeks ago as being well-thought out but made me cry .. Well, I mentioned it at work to the guys and they said they thought it would make more men want to run out and get them a dog because it was written not in cutsie terms, but serious sheeattt and men like that.. I was thinking, maybe we gals could do our own commercial along those lines:
You know.. It would open with some really cool Bolero music.. And pan to MD site and we could all be sitting with big puppy dog eyes with someone panning in the words…
“I know how to cook, I know how to make love, what I don’t know is why I am here, but I know I am a damn good woman….”
What do you think????? J/K…. now, if we played the Miller Light music in the background and we were all sitting nekkid holding pizzas??????? Oh yeah baaaabeeee!!!
Joke of the evening… drum roll pullleeeezzeee (ah, shut up.. I will look for the effin pills tomorrow):
Four old timers were playing their weekly game of golf, and one remarked
how nice it would be to wake up on Christmas morning, roll out of bed and
without an argument, go directly to the golf course, meet his buddies and
play a round. His buddies all chimed in and said, "Let's do it! We'll make
it a priority; figure out a way and meet here early, Christmas morning."
Months later, that special morning arrives, and there they are on the golf
course.
The first guy says, " this game cost me a fortune! I bought my wife such a
diamond ring that she can't take her eyes off it."
The second guy says, "I spent a ton too. My wife is at home planning the
cruise I gave her. She was up to her eyeballs in brochures."
The third guy says "Well my wife is at home admiring her new car, reading
the manual.
They all turned to the last guy in the group who is staring at them like
they have lost their minds. "I can't believe you all went to such expense
for this golf game. I slapped my wife on the butt and said,
'Well babe, Merry Christmas! It's a great morning for sex or golf, and she
said, "You'll need a sweater."
Copy & paste to friend: (Click inside box; Ctrl + C to copy; Ctrl + V to paste)
|
|
read more blogs!
Blogs by luvshorses644:
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| Continuation of Monday's Psychosis - The Plot Thickens.. Golf.... |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|