There's dominant and then there's Doms posted 2/27/2007 9:25:48 AM | 0 kudos what's this?     report abuse tagged: dominant, bdsm, dom, love, nurturing

HopelesslyHopeful

I've recently come to the realization that sometimes I like to be told what to do by my man.

Not just like : but like:

It's a little disturbing; not so much that I like it but in trying to explain it. Because, yes, I do like dominant men but I pretty much hate the attitudes of most men I've ever met who are in the bdsm lifestyle. They tend to be hypocrital bullies and I don't need that in my life.

So how could I "not need that in my life" when my knees are still weak from one man's simple, somewhat joking, order that was given hours ago?

errr.....

I think it's mainly this: BDSM , D/s, etc. persons are generally focused on their own needs, wants, and desires. Even the ones who claim to be submissive or slaves, are still doing it because it turns them on to be treated a certain way and they'll mostly serve anyone who will treat them that way. So, it's about getting what you want, and .. that doesn't mean that they don't love, don't connect on other wave lengths, but there is always that Superior/inferior vibe.

I like dominant men: confident, thoughtful, industrious, get things done kind of men. However, I also like the same kind of women. No, not sexually, just in general. .

I don't like "Dominant" men: I am not a pet to be trained for their pleasure, not mentally inferior, not of a sex that was made of less import by God on high, and there is nothing anyone could ever say that would make me think I am.

Therefore, I don't want a man who blusters and says that he is better than me or thinks because he has a penis and I don't that it makes him somehow more special.

I want a man who knows he is more special to me, than other men; who knows that if he has needs, wants, or desires he can and should express them, The sort of man whom if he sees what is best to do will do it, and if he's wrong will admit it, and who has the trust and confidence in me to know that if he does either, I will be there for him as he is there for me.

I read an article on being "taken in hand" versus bdsm. I find the fact that someone has created a whole new philosophy to explain the basic dynamics of marriage and men/women connections a bit tedious - that they should have to - but it's a good article in that it explains the difference between what I actually like and what most people assume I want when I say that I do like dominant men.

What it says is that the "taken in hand" philosophy stresses mutual pleasure, mutual enjoyment, sharing; it's about two people caring for each other and creating something together that works for them. Where the man is the head of the house, head of the family, but as a lover who nurtures and supports that family, not just lords it over them. .

A little quote that expresses the major differences between dominant vs Dom:

Copy & paste to friend: (Click inside box; Ctrl + C to copy; Ctrl + V to paste)

Blogs by HopelesslyHopeful: Mankind: truly a sucking wound on the butt cheeks of the Universe proper! Rense.Com - Consider this your email! Other songs from the Bad Song Generator (with rewrites for personal reasons) David's Song (September 15th 2005 w/minor edit now) Friends With Benefits This explains everything! My theory on relationships : dating and marriage (written in 2005) Getting Old Is Not For Sissies! IDIOCY Prologue Once Upon A Dream Beneath the veil ( a poem) Ignorance in ignoring? There's dominant and then there's Doms Enters The King: I My son (the youngest) Enters The King : VII Enters The King : VII Enters The King : VI Enters The King : V Enters The King : IV Enters The King : III Enters The King : II Let's say the F word! Another kind and lovely thought: The 213 Things Skippy is No Longer Allowed to Do in the U.S. Army finale