I hear a lot of the gals complaining with things like "I need to find an honest man", "I need a man who's faithful", they want marriage, fidelity, and security. -The poor sap who falls for this of course gets years of companionship, which is GOOD, BUT also the headaches, mind-games, bitchyness, and INSECURITIES.
It took me 15 years of marriage to figure it out so here it is in a nutshell.
People just want to be happy. If they did something stupid it's probably because they were missing something in their life -something they needed to be happy.
Would you fault your love for just wanting to be a happy fulfilled person? I for one would not and did not. If you can't embrace the other's complete happyness -then you're living in a dream world -someone will be miserable.
After that bit you may be thinking 'Oh he must have cheated' but it's the other way around. The ladies aren't ALL innocent and that's OKAY! We're ALL human.
Marriage in the new millineum is like a business, who's product is well ajusted children. Other than that, sequential dating probably works best.
If you want to get your hooks into a man -lighten up, become pleasent and approchable, GET OUT of the that house, and realize that he has his own vision of happyness.
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read more blogs!
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yashaenka
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Mar 29 @ 2:23PM
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To put it another way - happiness does not come from marriage or another person. It is created within each person who lives their life in a way that is fulfilling to them. All we can do is to assist another in finding the happiness they seek by being supportive, but it is a two way street. The same applies to love - we cannot make another love us, they do it of their own free will.
It's sad but true so much time is wasted trying to do what we can not control.
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bopeep13212
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Mar 29 @ 6:39PM
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Bingo, yashaenka.
We are responsible for our own happiness, and if we are not happy, we have no one to blame but ourselves. Sure, people can hurt us and we'll have some unhappy times because of it, but we are capable of pulling ourselves up by the bootstraps and moving on, carving our life as we want it to be. We're also capable of wallowing in misery and hoping someone will change our lives... those are the kind of people I avoid like the plague.
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SunBabe
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Mar 29 @ 9:36PM
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Neither my husband nor I were happy anymore. Not happy with each other which made us not happy with ourselves. We BOTH realized it and admitted we'd both be happier if we went our separate ways (our goals, interests and priorities had changed over 32 years), but I was the first to actually verbalize our lack of "happiness". ~grin~ Something we could agree on, once it was out in the open. It made our divorce amicable and HONEST. (And I was actually happy that he and my best friend, a widow, finally got together -- he needed somebody like her, not me, by his side for the rest of his life  )
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