1. When you break up with us, that means it's over, and we will only sleep with you two or three more times.
2. When you're talking dirty to us, call us a whore and not a prostitute.
3. Straight men should take a thirteen-week course from a gay man to fully appreciate what's fabulous about women.
4. Though we're happiest in the company of gay men, we're embarrassed when we marry one.
5. No, we didn't see last week's Battlestar Galactica.
6. We find dark-colored sheets creepy. And they don't conceal stains.
7. You shouldn't pass up a three-way because you "love us too much."
8. When a hot woman walks by and we ask if she's your type, refrain from saying things like "Nah, I like a woman with a little meat on her bones" as you give us a squeeze.
9. You look way sexier when you come home all unkempt from Survivor than you do all cleaned up at the reunion show.
10. It's sexy when you cook for us. Unless you're wearing an apron. Then it's just weird.
Jane Krakowski stars as sketch comedian Jenna Maroney on the NBC comedy 30 Rock.
This and all other similarly titled blogs posted by me today are courtesy of Esquire magazine (who left them to be printed off and shared) who say:
Reprinted with permission of Hearst Communications, Inc.
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