My virtual world has crumbled, I'M LEAVING!!! Goodbye! posted 4/23/2007 12:08:39 PM | 40 kudos what's this?     report abuse tagged: humor, sarcasm, blogtards, leaving

PullMyFinger

Yes, it's time PMF left the scene, exit stage left, so to speak. The very fiber of my being has been attacked, assailed, defiled, blitzed, poo-poo'd on, denigrated, slandered, clubbed with a blunt instrument......hang on, I'm thinking of more....pissed on, slapped with a pair of little girl's underwear, run over by a very large automobile, blistered, berated, maligned, vilified, beaten with an addict's keyboard and, last but not least...IGNORED. Nobody gives me any attention.... (whine)

I can't see how I could possibly go on, knowing that I may have hurt the feelings of so many little people. Oops...sorry, that was mean. So many addicted....dammit...so many sensitive girly gir...fk, I should probably just fkng leave, huh?

Ok, I'm back. I did leave, though.

See, it's like this. As I've stated in my profile from day one, I have the intelligence of a gnat. I'm certainly not as intelligent as so many of you are. I'm the common man...go ahead and do the admiring sigh right now. I'll give you a minute....

Good. Thank you.

I, like so many others on here, evidenced by the leavings...then, uhhh, return...of bloggers and posters, have become disenchanted with the way this community has progressed. I'm done.

Ok, I'm back.

I know my passing may have an impact, a detrimental one to many of you, but I'm sorry, I just can't handle it. This place has become my life...goodbye.

Ok, back again.

Did I mention I don't like gravy on my mashed potatoes? I got a scathing email yesterday from a potato. Apparently, having gravy on a potato is like the fkng thing and this particular potato called me a shallow mthrfker. Broccoli wrote me too, saying I was insensitive to potato and should be ashamed of myself, but I like broccoli, well...most broccolis...but I'm not all that into califlower. Califlower won't talk to me anymore cuz I apparently have a preference for broccoli. I swear, a fkr just can't win here...so I'm going. Don't bother to write anything that might boost my ego....bye.

Hi, me again.

I guess I take things too seriously. Maybe I should change my ways. I should write flowery shit, how life is perfect in my little virtual world. Without this world, my life would be NOTHING...I must repent. I'll do that by leaving, all you'll see is the dust from my wheels. Goodbye world, it's over and I'm moving on.

Hola, que pasa?

I'm not very good at leaving I guess. I took my toys home, but realized that they weren't mine, they belonged to Sci...so I came back. She has SUCH a nice ass. Sorry, I meant butt...I'm her ass. I know some of you are hooked up with sideshow freakish-looking mates...sorry about that. I know, I know, I'm gloating...sigh....I should be more sensitive to sideshow freaks...they're people too right? Ok, that was totally out of line...I'll go.

Howyewdewin? I'm back. Again

I like fat chicks. Nothing like a pair of stretch pants to put the ol' wood in the 2x4 ya know. Fine, I'll go. I was kidding anyway.

Yo, sup?

I'm all about people ya know. I'm multi-cultural. I'm Native American. Well, I think I am, anyway. Every other person on MD is...figured that horny Indian made his way past our mailbox at one time or another. I like Black people too...and Mexicans...Polish, Litu...Lithu....Russians. I especially like that fkr who got his nuts shot off in Vegas...what the fk was his name?...Two Pack? If you need any help with tolerance, I'm your fkn guy. I can't stand the way some people malign others because of their color. Those KFC guys in the south are meanies...fkrs. I'm pissed again. I'll be going now.

And I'm back...this shit is fun, isn't it? Leaving and coming back...who'd a thunk? It's like a fkng see-saw...we all like fkn see-saws...up and down...woo hoo!!

I just listened to that song by King Missile, Detachable Penis. God, it's funny. Can you imagine? Being able to unhook that fker and store it...what's it like not having a dick anyway? Some of you can tell me. That was TOTALLY fkng uncalled for...I'll be leavinggggggggggg.... Again.

I left and took the trash out...but I found my way back. Hi.

I should delete all my blogs, too, I'm thinking. I've written a few. Some of them are kinda...well...distasteful, to say the least. I should lay in wait for the unsuspecting...insult and delete. Then I can be the apple of everyone's eye again. Who me??? Why I was just fkn around, dude! Come on...heh heh..

Oh, who am I fkng kidding...this is the fkn Internet. Who gives a shit what anyone thinks? Too many people on here are social misfits; they read shit and automatically assume it's about them...it is, but for fks sake...show a little tenderness, climb every mountain...be the wind beneath my wings...or you could just fk off...NO, DON"T DO THAT!!! Another tear-filled departure might upset the fkng magnetic poles of the planet and kill all of us fkers.

I'll leave now, before that happens. Please, PLEASE DON'T LEAVE ANY COMMENTS. I promise that I won't have Sci post anything, saying how sweet I am...she'd be fkng lying anyway. BUT DON'T LEAVE COMMENTS. I would NEVER deliberately try and get on the popular blog list.

I'm ok...really.... (sniff) I'll survive....
© 2007 PMF

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Blogs by PullMyFinger: Extremist Muslim Athiests Claim Responsibility For So Cal Fires... Pine Tarred & Corked, Crowding The Plate... Give Them Enough Rope And.... * Plate Spinning Monkeys Riding Tricycles...* Close Quarter Combat…I Was There* Memorial Day? My God's Better Than Your God.... Blogapalooza & The Flatulent Forums... Pilfering Yellow-Bellied Bushwankers.... Chain Saws, False Messiahs and Snake Oil Salesmen.... Butt Sniffing & Nazi Dudes.... Vicar in a Tutu...A Conversation with God.... My virtual world has crumbled, I'M LEAVING!!! Goodbye! One step away from roadkill, a squirrel's tale.... Forgiveness and Understanding A Case of Rape~~Literally Ghosts in the Shadows... Uncle Finger's Boinking Guide for MEN My Recliner of Rage, Things that suck.... Of Squirrels and Mugshots.... BLOG WARS: My Battle Plans.... The Dragonfire Syndrome... Leprecauns, Unicorns, Tooth Fairys and Internet Dating.....