Today was me me's birthday. I am in wow every time I think that my baby is 11 years old. I look at her and today I saw a mini woman looking back. Every day she grows more toward woman hood. My sister came over today and brought some twinkies , ice cream on a stick and a few gifts. I love my sis. She is a fruit loop with a heart of gold.
Sunday will be the traditional birthday party with me me's best friend. I hate that payday is friday so we had to wait, but oh well. She will get two birthdays so she will be twice as happy.
The guy came today and moved the pump to the new well. I am without water again until the water from the new well clears up. It is doing ok and it does seem that each time we cut it off and leave it for 30 minutes and turn it back on that it gets a little less dirty and seems to be clearing up quicker. I am praying that by tomorrow it will finally be cleared up and we can connect it to the house. I am scared that it will be a repeat of the other well so i will save my happy dance until it clears up.
I drifted back to the day I gave birth to Me Me all day long. I had to tell her the tale of her birthday right down to the moment she cried her first breath at the moment of her birth 2:31 pm. It is an every birthday ritual for us.
Thinking about that day made me miss the baby.
I can't help but want to do it all again, I don't mind the pain , the getting up every two hours , the not being able to go to the bathroom alone, the puking and the pooping. I loved every minute of it all the good and the bad. I want it all again so much , but I guess I will have to wait for the grandchildren.
I could shake him to pieces. I told him not to get fixed and that he would want more and regret it. Nope, he listened to my mom who was not in her right mind at the time and did it any way. He says he wishes all the time that he hadn't done it. Yep, regrets are a B and hind site is 20/20.
I am glad I have my two girls, I am so happy I was allowed to be the one to give them a chance at life. I couldn't imagine not being their mom . They are the reason I breath and yet there is will always be a place at my table that will be empty to me.
I have decided to foster a child. I now have the room and as soon as I get my water right and get storage so i can clear out the fourth bedroom I am going to put in to do it.
I am a little scared to apply because of so much bad stuff about DHS in the news, but I think it would be the right thing to do. If I can't have another child myself without cheating on my hubby, then at least I can help another child to feel loved and have a few days of a good stable home. I know they need foster parents big time and my hubby is a great daddy and my girls say I am a great mom so I bet there is a child out there that needs us.
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