I Can't Stand... posted 7/15/2007 9:03:51 PM | 0 kudos what's this?     report abuse tagged: family, moms, kids, hatred

MonkeyWoman29

I can't stand 'supermoms'. I used to think that I would be one of those women who could clean every mess, keep all the laundry done up, keep the house in an immaculate state, work, go to school, go to church, raise and be a good mother to my kids and a good wife to my husband.

Heh. Then my daughter learned how to walk. And soon after she learned how to walk, she learned how to eat all 'by herself!' (at least she THOUGHT so). We moved from a two story town house to a one story house, which I LOVE, but for some reason it's a little harder to keep up with when you can't hide everything in your bedroom upstairs if the neighbors are coming over or you need a quick cleaning fix.

We'll have been here two years this September. The carpet is in desperate need of deep cleaning. I have a steam cleaner but I am too pregnant to push it, so I took the easy way out- and the rather expensive way, as well, and called up Stanley Steamer to do it. They are coming this Friday. I was going to have my husband do it with ours but I recall the one time I asked him to clean a room and he came out with it looking dirtier than it did when he went in. I don't think he was actually changing the water enough. Or did he even change it? Heh.

So here I am pregnant, and I am nesting, and I am dying to get up and clean out all the closets and clean the floors and have a gargantuan yard sale,clean out all my cabinets and rearrange the whole kitchen... but I can't. I have a hard time getting up and going to the bathroom. Yesterday I took a walk with my daughter through the neighborhood and down the trail and back. She was riding the cool new groovy girl scooter she got for her birthday. I was waddling along behind her. When we finally made it home after a two hour walk/ride - she wanted to go again! Let me tell you, it's hard to explain to a three year old that if you take another step you're going to either A) fall flat on your face or B)Go into premature labor. I told her I was tired and she said "But I'm NOT TIRED!" - well, go figure. You rode the whole way, knucklehead.

I have a friend who has four kids all under the age of six. She has a five year old son, a two year old son, and twin newborn boys. For some reason her house is ALWAYS immaculate. I never see dirty laundry in her bins and her kids are always dressed to the nines. Granted she doesn't do any work outside the home - and really neither does her live in boyfriend (except for Temp Jobs) - but I'd sure as heck love to be able to keep my house in that condition. Right now there is a load of laundry on the loveseat begging to be folded (it's mostly whites, i.e. socks and underwear, so it won't wrinkle) and a load still in the dryer actually getting wrinkled. I am also soaking a load of doilies/table cloths/ furniture throws that I got from Granny's house today (We went through her things. More crying time for me. We took home a lot of the angels and dolls we gave her) in some bleach water. I'd actually go shut the lid and let them cycle through if I knew I wasn't going to go to bed and pass out from being sleep deprived here in about ten minutes. I just remembered, though, that one of her friends goes over and helps her a lot with her kids. People stopped helping me with B when she stopped soiling her diaper so much and started soiling the carpet. She'll sneak a soda or a bottle of juice and have it opened in a skinny minute. And in a skinny minute there is more on the carpet than in her tummy. I don't know how Dan & his Sis made it through childhood, their mother is such a neat freak.

There are Moms at my niece's and nephew's school that have school age kids, toddlers, babies, jobs, and a book club. They go to wine tasting socials and I'm still figuring out how to get the grape juice out of one of B's pairs of pants... and the carpet. The closest I am coming to actually getting to go to a wine tasting social is just letting the carpet and pants ferment and taking a good intoxicating whif of them. I want to shoot the Mommies who do all this and still look like they had time to tan and don all their expensive Mary Kay make-up and get a hairstyle this very morning at the beauty parlor. I honestly, literally, want to take a small gun and shoot them. I don't want to kill them. I just want to mess with their perfection.

Maybe someday I'll achieve their perfection. Maybe not. But I have come to realize that I am getting to be OK with that, I said GETTING to be... Oh I still hate them, with a passion. But I no longer want to be one of them. I want to let the housework go and spend the afternoon watching my daughter chase butterflies or splash around in the swimming pool. I want to spend the evening on the couch with popcorn and soda, curled up next to my husband watching old Twilight Zone episodes. I don't want to worry about how many toys are in the floor when I leave to go to the doctor or how many toys will still be there when I get back. Or how many layers of dust reside on the furniture. I want to get to it - when I get to it. I can honestly promise myself, unless the cleaning fairies come or someone hires Merry Maids for me for my birthday - both extremely unlikely - I can honestly promise myself it will still be there when I get there. Until then, let me say...

SCREW IT. And as for the supermoms, I respect you... but SCREW YOU, TOO!


Regards,
Kris

Copy & paste to friend: (Click inside box; Ctrl + C to copy; Ctrl + V to paste)

Blogs by MonkeyWoman29: Yelling and Growling "Dear Mr. President" By Pink Losing Weight Is Worth It When Do You Feed A Baby? A Few Pics of our Newest Lil' Man She Can't Miss What She Never Knows WHAT in the WORLD?? No WAY! Extacy Physicians, Healthcare, & Predjudice Random Acts Of Kindness Happy Birthday To When Other Kids Are Bullies I Can't Stand... Hello all, Grandma here... Our Ninth Year Being Married The Perfect Kiss Wall Nails & Other Diets Everyone Has... Their Own Brand of Crazy An Old Friend An Evening At The Fair Why would my blog be deleted? My Dream Come True If... A Dr. Phil-ism In Response to a Christian's Catholic Blog...