I guess every bachelor is entitled to a few major household errors in his life. We forget to put the toilet seat down when we visit female friends, sometimes we let the laundry get backed up and 2 days ago I made the ultimate mistake. I ran out of toilet paper with a female guests at my house.
2 days ago I received a gentle knock on my front door. I was tickled to death to see it was 2 of my best friends. A brother and sister that I had known for years and think very highly of. They had brought a six pack of beer over and asked if I had any plans. Of course I didn't so I told them to come on in. 
Now let me just say, "when a woman un-announced first enters your home all types of thoughts race through your mind as a guy." You start scanning your brain and trying to remember; is my dirty underwear picked up, are there any naked women pictures lying around or anything else they might find offensive. My quick mind check revealed no problems. Then it hit me like a ton of bricks. I forgot to pick up toilet paper today at the store. Anyway, it wasn't like this was an immediate emergency and I figured they wouldn't be here long anyway so I'd play it by ear and wing it. 
Well...as Wolf's luck would have it, 30 minutes after arriving, my petite little guest began looking around and then asked, "where's your bathroom?" At this time little beads of sweat starting popping out on my forehead.  I answered her meakly, "it's through the hall to your left dear." All of a sudden a reprieve from the heavens, she says, "I've got to pee really bad." I wiped the sweat off my forehead and started smiling and told her, "you just go for it baby." A bullet was dodged right? Not a chance, you see you don't know about Wolf's luck.
In about 2 minutes she yells out and says, "where's the damn toilet paper?" I just about choked on my Bud Light. I looked at her brother and said, "I thought she had to pee?" he said Wolf, women have to wipe either way." My god in heaven, "when did they starting doing that?"  He just laughed at me and shook his head.
Now I'm in damage control and I have to fess up to her about my paper shortage. She's screaming at me to find something and I guess desperate times require desperate measures. I remembered I just bought a pair of shoes and the tissue paper was still stuck in them. I proudly passed this through the door, only to be screamed at again. "I'm not using that, Get me my purse, I've got some kleenex in there."
The look she gave me when she emerged from my bathroom was one of dis-belief. Happily, she does have quite a sense of humor so we managed to laugh it off. Well anyway, at this point, is there any doubt in anyone's mind why I'm still single? :))))lol 
Everyone have a good evening!
Wolf
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