Pine Tarred & Corked, Crowding The Plate... posted 10/19/2007 7:50:02 PM | 20 kudos what's this?     report abuse tagged: whatever, blog, sarcasm

PullMyFinger

“Words can be like baseball bats when used maliciously.”
~Sidney Madwed

After reading Jentoblues101 blog on stepping up to the plate, I looked at my own personal tastes in writing, not in books or publications, but on here. What I found disappointed me.

I began my writing career in junior high after being found guilty on a minor infraction of rules. I was tried, judged and handed a sentence which resulted in a pseudo parole. The infraction? I "accidentally" set one of the classrooms on fire...on a non-school day, Saturday. Was I guilty of malicious intent, no. The bottle rocket "accidently" found its way into an open window; I was aiming at the girl’s locker room, 50 yards to the right.

Anyway, I ended up apologizing to the school board, my parents, my peers, the mayor, the Fire Dept and of course; my future employer the Police Dept. This sentence also required a written apology, so there you have it. A very well written "I'm sorry" and never ever play with fireworks dissertation. I also included an explanation of ballistics and proper flight guidance in case some other dumbass decided to take my unfortunate mistake and improve on it.

Regardless of what you think of my writing on here, at least I wrote/write blogs, whether you agree with the style or not, it's a fkn blog. The ridiculous habit of writing nonsense and describing it as a blog has been taken to heart by many on here. The banana crowd has taken over, the King/Queen/Goddess/Stud/BadPoets and whatthefkever crowd has pissed in the ice tea and their's nothing you can do about it.

We have kinky haired trollops arguing with whothefkknows, we have pundits from all sides ripping into each other over shit that would kill a cockroach. We have the religious zealots arguing with non-religious zealots over shit that should really be reserved for each of their concertina wired compounds, then you have the woe is me crowd who couldn't buy a fkn date and of course, the dancing banana crowd who has nothing better to do on a weekend night to invite you to a fkn cyber party, what the holy fk?

My disappointment? Those rare bloggers who actually HAD the habit of writing some pretty decent stuff in my opinion. They've apparently undergone some kind of mind-morph and have joined the crowd of disenchanted, the unwashed bloggers who wouldn't know a blog if it slipped up their ass on a greased aluminum baseball bat. One of my favorites has apparently found herself writing shit normally found in supermarket tabloids, another is embroiled in some sort of argument with an old broad and others; like my better half, have just stopped. It's a pity.

At one time kiddies, MD had a pretty good blogging site. Of course there were misunderstandings, some arguments and stupidity. Stupidity will always be found on a site like this, but the bullshit thats reared its ugly head as of late should be reserved for the schoolyard at some fkn middle school. Some of you are approaching 60 fkng years old and are acting like a 12 year old. I apologize to 12 year olds. It's fkng pathetic. Some of you are on here to meet a mate, to find that ever so elusive "ONE". If a decent guy or girl reads some of the trash you dildos are pumping out, they'll soon click you off. If you create/feed off of drama on here, I'll bet every fkn baseball card I have that you're the same in real life.

Is there hope? Of course there is. Jen still blogs, Sweetheart (Whom I consider an emerging talent) still blogs, Psycho has teased us with some stuff, the bearded guitar twirling ZZ Top lookin tunesguy has tried to blog, but I think he's as disgusted as I am. Then you have your interlopers, but they're few and far-between.

I have noticed that depression is setting in for a lot of you. It's Fall and Winter is quickly approaching. Suicides will increase and I expect we'll see a few blogs announcing the passing of some on here. That staph germ in the news is making its existence known too.

Some of you have asked about the home front here. Yes, Sciurusniger and I are doing just peachy keen. Yes, we met on here. I noticed her the first day I signed on and it took off from there. She had a ton of patience as my chosen career put a strain on things for a little while, but we survived. We're unbearably happy, traveling the compass and feeding her love of photojournalism. She's working hard, still taking care of injured/orphaned wildlife and still a hottie with a naughty body.

She basically ignores the fact that I'm an asshole, which of course works in my favor. I do have my nice moments, occasionally. I even petted a squirrel once. I know, I'm a dick, you hate me, you think I'm mean and shit, I'm too mean with my descriptions and blah blah blah, but I haven't lied to you. I just say it without worrying about what's PC and what's not. I've had threats, emails describing my lack of empathy, I've been called names by Frodo Baggins and a Weeble that Wobbles but won't fall down and a ton of fat chicks who just don't get it. I may not blog often anymore, that's due to having a LIFE...but I can promise you, I'm not going anywhere. I'm here to write blogs, you won't see a dancing banana; I'll never ever throw a cyber party, too old for that nonsense. I'm not here for acceptance or kudos...I'm here to write, usually at your expense but that's only cuz you get so pissed off.

This is a blog, not a discussion.

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