I kinda wish I could get a log of who clicks on my blogs. I might have a finer appreciation of my audience and perhaps adjust the nature of my blogs to fit their interests.
I admit the title was pandering to a baser nature. Buzz words say so much without saying anything, nes pas?
There is something to be said of catering to the id...
The id is responsible for our basic drives such as food, sex and aggressive impulses. It is amoral and egocentric, ruled by the pleasure-pain principle; it is without a sense of time; completely illogical; primarily sexual; infantile in its emotional development; will not take 'no' for an answer. It is regarded as the reservoir of the libido or "love energy".
A popular interpretation of the id is not that it is "convincing" the mind to ignore social norms, but rather in itself just does not take social norms into account when 'thinking' or 'acting'. The id is the primal, or beast-like, part of the brain, determined to pursue actions that are pleasurable, such as eating or copulation. The prime motive of the id is self-survival, pursuing whatever necessary to accomplish that goal.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Id%2C_ego%2C_and_super-ego
It's a catering to my desire for companionship that I adjust my search parameters to include longer and longer distances from me... to check out profiles without pictures... to be open minded about women with children... to generally be willing in some part to compromise to one degree or another in whom I am willing to get my interest and start a dialogue with.
Is this desperation or a sense of futility of meaningful connection with potential partners closer to me? I don't know. I do know that a "perfect" match is so unlikely that I may be looking for a-very-long-time if I keep my search too "high minded".
Shouldn't I want and seek someone who will best match me?
Sure.
But... time being something of a factor, a sense of immediacy (perhaps also the "instant gratification gene") tugs on the impulse and I go into a phase of wondering if I might be so lucky to find a really close match who lives a long ways away but might be willing to relocate to here.
Am I very selfish in wanting to bias my thinking towards that venue? Perhaps. It's also a measure of fantasy wish fullfillment.
I often wonder about the nature of being on a dating site.
Is this the weirdest thing or what?
We're here to be open minded to starting a relationship, perhaps fall in love and find ourselves willing to compromise in order to have a greater measure of the fullfillment we lack.
It definately seems to be a balancing act. It also feels a bit like some kind of batering process or diplomatic negotiations...
"I'll give up this thing if you bend on that issue... and then maybe we can meet somewhere in the middle... and then we might find some gratification with each other..."
Not picky enough... and you might not be pleased for very long, if at all. Too picky, and you might be waiting a long time.
This inner compromise must debate the issues with your id, and the battle goes back and forth internally as the dread "alone and bored" symptoms wax and wane as the weeks turn to months and years.
If I did know who clicked on my blog, or profile, or whatever... would I be more eager to make a quick "barter" of my desires and compromise some things to get one step closer to companionship... or would I seek out better ways to advertise myself as attempt to sell my assets on a "as is" basis?
Or... is this all a generalized "as is, best offer" kinda method of advertising myself here that I should be content with until the right "buyer" comes along?
I just hope the goods don't depreciate over time. I know the temptation to lower the opening "bidding price" gets stronger as time passes.
No answers here, just food for thought as I look... and wonder... and send out a few e-mails now and again... and wonder.
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