TroutFishing
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Nov 25 @ 12:26AM
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You are correct. No WORK is required if it is "The Real Thing"
You care for that person for who they are - NOT what they DO for YOU.
You merely allow that person to be as wonderful as when you met.
You enjoy every moment spent with that person.
Have Fun.
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fstwrtr
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Nov 25 @ 12:37AM
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thoughts??..thoughts you ask??
see what happens when the whole audience agrees!
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JimNastics
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Nov 25 @ 12:37AM
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I think the key is that some relationships require more (too much) work than others. Ideally it should be a meshing of the minds and bodies, but what percentage of relationships are ideal. If you have an ideal relationship,
why would anybody end that ? If you don't have an ideal relationship, but it is a good one, you work to iron out the points of contention to help make it better.
Now, that doesn't necessarily imply hard work. If it does, then that can get old quickly. But, compromise for someone you love, should not be too difficult.
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asnet
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Nov 25 @ 12:43AM
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Bush uses "work" to describe the killing in Iraq.
I agree with you.
If it takes that much "work" .............
But there are times when it does.
Short periods.
The longer it takes, the less likely it will get done.
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alivenwell351
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Nov 25 @ 2:19AM
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Yeah....
I've come to believe that everyone has their own certain traits that make up who and what they are right down to the core...and it seems the longer you live, the more some or all of those traits can become carved in stone. 2 people will either mesh at that level or they won't...
I think maybe what some call the "work" part of it all has more to do with learning to deal with and adjusting to each others' "quirks"....you know, Venus and Mars stuff.....
JMO.....
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imsingle2
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Nov 25 @ 2:28AM
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Falling for someone is the easy part, work is maintaining it and it has to be a Labor of Love... It's the kind of work, you really have to love to do...
There is no 50/50 relationship... It takes 110%, and it's that little 10% that is the work that you have to love...
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SunBabe
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Nov 25 @ 2:57AM
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I dunno. Just like GA related, when I had that unbelievably magic "perfect" relationship, neither of us felt that there was ANY work involved -- we discussed the "anomoly" a number of times...the relationship just flowed and allowed us the time and energy to devote to living our love. 
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john33142
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Nov 25 @ 3:26AM
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 .. Finally...I have said this very thing to other for a life time... some will give you a close to hatful look
I to have had ONE relationship of over two year that was as she talked about .. which did not end from any ill feelings...
If it's right it will NOT be work... why would anyone think it should work?? or work as most think....
hopeless romantic ?? those are the words of other ... looking in... not the romantic
Chemistry...  .. what is that ??... lust ?? is that the other term for it ???? we all form our own meaning of these words...
work ?? to keep a relationship going,, why ??? It seems at that point the damage has taken place,, after it's just a band aid.. to save face in that socail setting...
If possible you get 10,000 kudo's....your own island the fancy car a sick horse and two goats in a pear tree ...... 
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sputter49
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Nov 25 @ 4:30AM
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Excellent point! Of those I've chatted with on a serious nature... I make it a point to ask after they describe their lives which involve "others" as a profession... I simply ask... "do you have the strength to leave your work at the door"? This question without fail... usually is followed up with... "what do you mean"?
Life should NOT be allowed to follow us through our front doors after work... unless it is mutually agreed by both... to do so. You are so absolutely correct... a relationship if, correct for both... NEED NOT REQUIRE WORK on a daily bases. I find that those relationships that REQUIRE work... usually allow the outside world to follow them through the front door.
A healthy busy couple need space for each other... together... one on one without the constant interruption of outside interference. Certainly, there are individuals that their livelihood depends on 24/7 contact with the outside world. It takes SUPER human strength... to conduct a normal relationship in such situations. Some are very successful... most are not.
WORK to maintain a relationship? I'm with you... should never be a issue between two dedicated loving hearts.
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ragtopcookie
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Nov 25 @ 7:04AM
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i think the word youre looking for here is compromise......in every relationship there always has to be a meeting half way......if one of the two has to go more than half way in it.....then it becomes work to try and hold it all together.....and then one needs to decide if its worth doing......i agree...work is something you do to make a living.......not in a real relationship.....cookie
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heo56
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Nov 25 @ 9:07AM
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Thank you, GA, for making a blog of what I have always professed to be true. A successful relationship is not work, it is fun and keeps itself going simply because the couple cares about each other enough to make it fun.
If the relationship is a lot of work, then maybe the two weren't meant to be together.
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GiggleAddiction
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Nov 25 @ 12:27PM
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 I've come to believe that everyone has their own certain traits that make up who and what they are right down to the core...and it seems the longer you live, the more some or all of those traits can become carved in stone. 2 people will either mesh at that level or they won't...
I think maybe what some call the "work" part of it all has more to do with learning to deal with and adjusting to each others' "quirks"....you know, Venus and Mars stuff..... I have to agree. The older I get, the less likely it is that I will tolerate some traits I've tolerated in the past. Back in the day when I thought you could "love" everything better. Love was (in my mind at some point) all that mattered. Then I grew up and realized, it's all the other stuff that actually MAKE the love. 
Falling for someone is the easy part, work is maintaining it and it has to be a Labor of Love... It's the kind of work, you really have to love to do...
There is no 50/50 relationship... It takes 110%, and it's that little 10% that is the work that you have to love... Interesting concept. I fall short on the "falling in love is easy" stuff. That isn't likely to happen with me for a lonnnnnnnnnnng time. As for the 50/50 stuff, couldn't agree more. I think one day I give 90% he gives 10% and other days he gives 99% and I don't give much at all. I guess my theory is that sometimes it evens out in the end. When that NEVER happens, it's time to move on to 100% just me (oh, and I ALWAYS get to keep the dog.) 
the relationship just flowed and allowed us the time and energy to devote to living our love. Exactly and what a wonderful thought: living the love.
If the relationship is a lot of work, then maybe the two weren't meant to be together. [QUOTE]
Hope you don't mind, but I emailed this sentence to someone. That's all, just this one line.
Thank you all for posting ~ I am having a personal view of this at the moment. I'm not in a relationship, but have been the sounding board, witness of horrors two can do to one another and also quite sickened by the way some people interact. These two individuals have a small child with cystic fibrosis, the reality is, he very well may not live to be very old ~ and all they do is bicker, fight, and "work on it." Dear me ~ if it takes that kind of work ~ give it up to a Judge, become friends, love your child and move the hell on. But, I have a "life is too short for bs" attitude. Those two, well, they are just sick enough they don't seem to think anything else is normal. If they are the poster-couple for normal, I'm going to the unusual/dorkish/odd category if I ever date again. LOL ~ Happy Sunday All.
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Sahaj
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Nov 26 @ 10:32PM
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This is an interesting one. Really I have to say that I agree with you Giggles… If you are always having to work at it, it just isn’t right. But I have known couples that had a base of great love and then had great challenges that forced them to work in some way, to maintain some kind of closeness, to overcome some difference or obstacle. After it was all done they agreed that the struggle transformed their relationship and themselves as individuals.
I think that FIRST there needs to be a basis of deep love, then sticking around through difficult times.
But there are also those that just don’t seem to be meant to be together. Their relationship if fraught with difficulty, but still they hang on because of wrong reasons, cultural or personal. My favorite I have heard is – “No one else could possibly love me”, that’s pathology.
I have deeply loved a woman but being around her was just constant work. In the beginning there were great synchronistic things that brought us together, but that didn’t seem to last. (I’m a big believer in synchronicity)
So now, I’m with you Giggles.. I’m just too old now to waste any time with anyone that I just don’t click with.
Shouldn't work be what we do for a living, and homelife be our safe haven, our place of peace and solice and an overall loving environment?
Exactly. I have to come home to someone who is a refuge to the "work" that i do with so many other people.
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AttractedCentaur
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Dec 19 @ 2:45PM
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Hmmm ...
Very deep. I am not sure if I can even answer, much less comment on this one. There is a difference between "working" verses "learning". Perhaps, as we get older, wiser, experienced we expect different things out of our relationships. Being with someone does require "a commitment to appreciate the differences yet enjoy what is common".
I am not so sure about relationships that "flow" without at least some stress, "work" or some other "bumps" - this would be human nature.
Anyway, this has gotten me thinking ...
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