Well, I made it through the first shared visit Christmas. The house is to quiet though.
I am headed to bed soon as I have to work tomorrow. I hate this, but he chose the path and I am living it. He seems to get pleasure from my pain.
One day soon Karma shall creep up and bite him good, until that day I will do the best I can to live for my girls and do what I know is right. I know that somewhere tonight is a man that God knows will be my everything soon. I am not sure how soon but God knows.
I imagine that he will think tonight how much he wishes he had someone to share his Christmas night with this year and will send out a prayer for her to show up soon not knowing that next year I will be the one next to him smiling and thinking how lucky I am to be with him and how lucky he is going to be later that night.
He is happy spending time with family and friends today but feeling like it would be so much better if he had a special person to share his life with and the season would be much happier if she was there. He laughs and smiles but inside he can't help but feel like something is missing. He falls asleep with one last thought. God send her soon. He has no idea she is at that moment saying the very same prayer. God send him soon.
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