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Reading Profiles and Smoking Bluberry...

posted 12/28/2007 5:10:34 AM |

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tagged: profile, questions, blog

donathen

Perhaps every dream contains within it the seed of self destruction, because all throughout the pages of our community, as well as in my other social Iives I see the lovers of love try to exert control over their immediate destinies. We go believing in the "hype" of self made manipulations we name profiles, and worse, place our self inextricably in a display case made of glass with the density of steel.
Id venture to say that I know that I am just as trapped- all of us tending to that little seed of self-obsession we have become too weak to disregard.
Like, what the f*** is up, people?
KEEPING IT REAL
Is what im talking about- I know I have my demons, but I don't see any of yours weaved into your introduction to others, yet I cant help but notice that the average first date (which actually happens on line), is tainted with an undercurrent of "finding out" the negatives of a possibility, as if we are sooooo very compatible with everyone.
I don't know what most of you fellow potential mates are thinking as you read this, but Ive come to discover that the mainstreets, and even the alleyways of of our community are full of shops were broken hearts peddle their wares and and hope to purchase ideal situations. Just for the record, I haven't found ideal situations myself yet- rather I feel I had to compromise
my secrutiy, comfort level, and even privacy for a glimpse of some of the hearts on display here. In almost every situation it has been worth it...
so no- Im not complaining...
But I am- I cannot compromise. Im not here for anything false, and I apologize for turning you inside out, fluffing you up, and tugging on you in a few places if you seem stiff to me.
Heres the hit for me- Can we all get together for a pow-wow?
The emphisis on pourpose here- Im meeting far too few of you after the
the screen goes dim- which by the way, it never does.

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Reading Profiles and Smoking Bluberry...

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Comments:

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Angel603	Dec 28 @ 6:39AM
	It seems to me people's profiles often focus on their disillusionment in past relationships. Women tend to put the message out there about what they don't want rather than what they do. Men tend to write little about themselves... they seem to find it difficult to sell themselves. I see no harm in putting out a positive advertisement... being negative is limiting.... I've heard too many people say "we must know our limitations".... why? They are of our own making. What is the difference between someone who is successful and someone who isn't? Their level of self-imposed limitation. Are a lot of people looking for perfection in a profile I wonder? I tend to go on a gut feeling rather than being bowled over by the pic or the wording. I have noticed anything negative in a profile seems to stand out more than the positive though. It's not a good advertisement for partner potential.... how many of us meet someone for the first time and tell them all the bad stuff about ourselves. Nobody is perfect, if we were then we'd all be exactly the same, like clones.... and extremely uninteresting. We are all a product of our lives and I find it hard to believe there is one person out there without some kind of baggage. If we give ourselves time to get to know each other these things will become apparent in time but who is going to be attracted by it? except maybe someone who will exploit our insecurities. I feel there's no harm in selling yourself in a positive way, highlighting the good stuff so if it appeals to others they can relate to it... and if it doesn't they can simply move on. An interesting and stimulating blog..... I hope it creates the interaction you hoped for.

behonestaboutlove	Dec 28 @ 7:51AM
	I think way too many people are way too picky and that is why there are so many single people in the world. People who are not perfect are wanting perfect. Honesty these days is rare. I have learned to let go of my past relationship issues and not take them out or compare new relationships I enter into against the bad things that have happened in the past with other guys I dated. This helps alot to give the relationship a good positive chance. After all it is no one elses fault that I had jerks in my life who hurt me and treated me bad so why take it out on them. It also doesn't mean they are all going to be that way. This goes both ways for men and woman, not all woman are going to be the way others were to you guys in the past. This is just my two cents and advice to people from what I have learned and how I live my life. Stay Positive. Jennifer

chris549547	Dec 28 @ 8:00AM


Ready52627	Dec 28 @ 8:32AM
	Pretty easy to find the ones who are just out for a fling vs. a real relationship. Just read closely and they will stick out like a sore thumb. If you do get to chat with them, ask about their past relationships and/or marriages. If they tell you the truth in many cases you'll run the other way! Just beware.

Ready52627	Dec 28 @ 8:51AM
	Honesty for some people is just a word they throw around. Looks good on paper, sounds good when they say that it means lots in their relationships but then they don't practice it. They make what they want at the time look like the truth to make themselves happy. Hard lessons learned by many of us. Finding out about past relationships is a good idea of what to expect in the future. I never thought that until I learned the hard way. Ouch that hurts!

debbz32	Dec 28 @ 11:26AM
	umm babe...don't know who pissed you off, but much love to you darlin...be safe on New Years wherever you are rockin...

pamdemonium	Dec 30 @ 1:09AM
	..Im meeting far too few of you after the the screen goes dim- which by the way, it never does. offer's open

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