I'm not exactly sure what's going on with me but during the last 3 weeks I have had some of the most intense meditation sessions with a gazillion questions and equally a gazillion possibilities being shown to me. It's as if something unlocked a part of my brain that had been sleeping for a long time. And though it's very exciting it's also an overload of information and I find that my head hurts.  I can assure all of you that you haven't heard the last of me.
One area of focus for me is my weight gain. I have always been a wonderul size 10 the majority of my life, even after having children it was a matter of weeks before being able to fit into my clothes. However, when I turned 40 something wicked this way came.  I don't know how or why or which way or any of that "stuff" that led up to this physical change in me. I suspect it was many ingredients that played a role in this. I quit smoking after polluting my lungs for 25 years; I turned 40, metabolism begins to slow down; I started taking medication for anxiety/depression 3 years ago & was told weight gain might be one of the side effects of this medicine; and perhaps the cherry on top was being told all my life that I better watch what I eat cause though I can burn it off while I'm young, when I turn 40 it will make me fat {old belief system}.
So I'm sitting here thinking about how much I do not like the way I look, feel, think, etc... about this 60 pound weight gain & that I desperately need to lose it permanently. I go out to buy the blow up exercise ball with video, strap on ankle/wrist weights, headband, 100% juice, multi-vitamin, fish and vegetables & fruits... hyped up to begin a life altering change for myself. Then I begin to think things I never thought before, like . . . well, if what I think and what I believe = creating my day to day reality AND I'm placing my FOCUS on needing to lose these horrible, unacceptable, ugly 60 pounds on my body... then won't my reality be "I'm fat"???? Wouldn't the best solution be to see myself as skinny, healthy, happy? Shouldn't this be where my focus/beliefs/thoughts be??? Cause where I place my focus is what I'm attracting into my life so if I see myself as "needing" to lose weight then my focus is on being fat. UGH!!!! 
Ok, so who wants an inflatible exercise ball with video, strap on wrist/ankle weights, headband, etc....????
Love,
Theresa
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| Can't stop thinking . . . |
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intrigued_no_end
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Jan 21 @ 8:35AM
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Elbereth,
I think this is where "supportive and encouraging" friends come in handy!
Don't give the equipment away... you can DO IT!!! I believe in you... !!! Well, I'm basically a "nobody"... but, I'm a friend that thinks YOU can accomplish what you wish to accomplish! :)
If you have been a size 10 all your life, you can be whatever size you WANT to be again ....because you have an undeniable "discipline"... maybe it's subconsiously working on your behalf ... but it's still there!! :)
You are fine... your friends will step up and be there for You!
Go for it.... you CAN... .and you WILL.
a friend... Intrigued
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edthepoet
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Jan 21 @ 9:09AM
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In life, sometimes people over think about things and at this moment, I believe you are.
Your gonna take this weight and turn it into stress, which will cause more harmful things to you slowly and without you being able to notice.
It's ok to focus on losing weight, just leave the beating yourself up part out.
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jayej
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Jan 21 @ 9:15AM
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you know you need to lose so save the equipment....but do not look at yourself like unacceptable, ugly 60 pounds on my body... then won't my reality be "I'm fat"???? that all has a negative conotation
It is not that you can think your reality to be different but you can accept the challenges as is. Then turn it into a positive plan.
I need to lose some weight so this is what I am going to do about it. Here is the bump in the road and here is what I am going to do about it.
I am in radical need of losing some weight... I am 51 and have always been big. I fought the "uglies" about it a long time ago, I am who I am. But I was always able to work and work hard. I got ranover by a car about 15 yrs ago and it changed my ability to be physical and now the weight feels as if it is sucking the life out of me.
So my challenge is how to become more physical again...the weight willl leave as I start to rebuild some strength.
No negatives though..........just little steps until I can make strides, then strides till I can jump.
J
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itsmeisall
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Jan 21 @ 9:31AM
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I'm right there with ya Sister!!! But as Ed says......your over thinking it! You just need to put all that negative energy into some positive energy! No matter what you look like on the outside....your still the same wonderful person you always were on the inside!!! One piece of advice.......Don't over do it.....make small changes at first, get used to a lifestyle change slowly.
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TroutFishing
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Jan 21 @ 10:44AM
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99.9 % of what we are as humans is something
you can't see
you can't touch
you can't smell.
We are spiritual beings having a human experience,
yet we are told that the visible part is more important.
Unless there are health issues, the formula is simple -
burn more calories than you consume.
I do not keep carb laden (sugar) junk food in the house.
I portion food BEFORE cooking it.
I found hobbies that are fun while burning calories (bicycling, kayaking etc.).
I lost 40 pounds the first summer I started in 1989.
I did NOT count a single calorie.
Become the sum total of your choices.
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Elbereth529
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Apr 17 @ 7:11AM
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Ok...here's an update on the whole lose-weight-wait-a-minute-I'm-already-skinny- saga!
When I first brought this to your attention about thoughts creating reality and mentioning that if I keep thinking "I need to exercise more, eat less, drink more water" to lose weight then I've placed my focus on "I'm FAT" and therefore that's my reality. So my project was to not exercise, not change my diet or lifestyle, quit looking in the mirror and to tell myself that I'm already a very healthy, skinny woman.
This was what.... 3 months ago? I am 5' 8" tall and weighed 230 pounds when this started. A month later I went to the doctors for my yearly check-up and when they placed me on the scale it registered 222 pounds. Two days ago I went to the Rhuematologist Specialist and when I stepped up on the scale I weighed 210 pounds. My family members and friends and fellow employees have been saying stuff like..."my gosh, you've lost weight! What have you been doing?!?!" and I tell them I've done nothing different except to believe that I am a very skinny & healthy woman.
This is fun!!! 
Love,
Theresa
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