I knew this!.... It has happened everytime, in my life after; myself and my
partener have cooked (finished) making love,  whoopie, hiding the salami,
planting the moose root ect, whatever you want to call it,........I'm sure you
get my jest.....The ole Tube Steak ( Billy the Kid) shrinks some......Never
really thought much about it.  But, I suppose its a built in protection thing..........
Anyway,......recently I had the rare...very rare of late; opportunity of planting the
moose root  I might add, I was gracious and extremely appreciative!! Nothing
like the touch of a Woman!!!  ...Oh yea, like I was trying to say; In the course of our event,. while I'm standing there"Saluting"in my BD suit My lady friend says......."If you don't mind me asking "how big are you" I readily replied,.......I'm
....__"......She says, are you sure?  I say...yes I'm sure!  ........Now
we are having fun, ....so I'm game for just bout anything So when she
asks me ,if I had a ruler and could she measure it?" I responded sure!! 
Then it happened the results were in or, up however you want to look at it.......
................................You are...._.50"    .......................I had to
check her measurement!!!...twice!!,.....She was right. Then I thought back;yep
its been about 10 years since my last measurement. I have lost 5/8 of an inch since then!!!!  Now I knew a cooked tube steak would shrink, but this
is cruel  It appears........... Aged Tube Streak shrinks as well!!! .... . 
Dinner Anyone.... Hof 
Copy & paste to friend: (Click inside box; Ctrl + C to copy; Ctrl + V to paste)
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read more blogs!
Blogs by hoftner:
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| Cooked Tube Steak Shrinks!!! |
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sweetgypsysoul
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Feb 7 @ 6:23PM
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I love your profile. My best of wishes to you and yours. *smile*
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enigmasrook
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Feb 7 @ 6:25PM
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You know, in Antarctica I have that problem all of the time. But for different reasons. It's cold down here.......takes a warm igloo, a bearskin rug, and 3 gallon jugs of water to reverse the shrinkage....but when it happens, WOW......come to mama.
Very cute, hof.
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Ginstl
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Feb 7 @ 6:26PM
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As I visualize the title of your blog I...........Never mind. 
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cartay25
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Feb 7 @ 6:27PM
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Don't worry Hof..........it's a proven fact that everyone shrinks with age.
Of course I always thought that they were refering to height.
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JimNastics
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Feb 7 @ 6:33PM
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Maybe she didn't have you fully excited yet at the time.
Actually, I think it's sort of rude. 
Can you imagine if we got a ruler out and
started measuring their body just before the act ?
I can see the waterworks now. 
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Dixielady67
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Feb 7 @ 6:34PM
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Thanks for this useful information ...I'll keep my ruler handy and IF I ever get lucky I'll try out this theory
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suzzieq356
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Feb 7 @ 6:37PM
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I'm sorry!!!!!
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Danishandy
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Feb 7 @ 6:39PM
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^^^^ yea right
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hoftner
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Feb 7 @ 6:40PM
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psst Jimm Jim I did!!
And it was all in fun and then some
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chris549547
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Feb 7 @ 6:59PM
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mordru
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Feb 7 @ 7:00PM
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Thats why mines a Ball Park it plumps when you cook it.
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kerbear57
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Feb 7 @ 7:40PM
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Dr. Oz on Oprah says...." If a man looses 30 pds he'll gain an inch in his, er, uhhh......length.
BTW....enjoyed your bantor! 
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sweetthing937
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Feb 7 @ 7:41PM
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hoftner
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Feb 7 @ 7:49PM
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Kerbear I love
Dr Oz......but I'm thinkin he's
referring to a, Belly Do.....The belly sticks
out more than his dic*y do!! In this case
you would gain an 1" if you lost 30 lbs because you could see
more of it jmo
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tentfire
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Feb 7 @ 7:53PM
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kerbear, I have heard something along the same line. I have heard/read that in men that tend to carry their weight in their mid-section(especially their tummy), as they gain weight they lose length, but......as they lose the weight, they regain their length.
cute blog
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GenuineHarleyGirl
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Feb 7 @ 8:13PM
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Shrinkage happens. But aged steak has that extra flava to it. Seasoning, so to speak. Oh , bullcrap, just trying to make you feel better
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GenuineHarleyGirl
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Feb 7 @ 8:16PM
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I carry a protractor, not a ruler. It's the angle of the dangle. 
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hoftner
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Feb 7 @ 8:19PM
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Ty for the emails;suggestions of
help ie,creams,salts, hot water ect
I'm not complainning about whats left
There's plenty!!!!....I just don't like loosing the 5/8"
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loreal
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Feb 7 @ 8:25PM
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Genuineharleygirl!
Tonight you are my Naughty Soul Sista! lol
You have more _alls than I do! lol 
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GenuineHarleyGirl
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Feb 7 @ 8:31PM
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But hoftner's got more _alls than both of us together. That's not what he's concerned about though L.
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hoftner
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Feb 7 @ 8:36PM
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Well..... Actually...GHG, thats true those along with nose hairs
have grown as I age
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Dixielady67
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Feb 7 @ 8:57PM
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That must be what happened to the 5/8 of an inch that you lost...it went to your balls
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GenuineHarleyGirl
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Feb 7 @ 9:04PM
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Thank you Dixie for saying what I was thinking...
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hoftner
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Feb 7 @ 9:08PM
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Dixie... .......Better it went there
instead of the nose
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AutumnSilk
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Feb 7 @ 11:15PM
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Did you try putting some miracle gro on the thing hof? Maybe next time you're using the VO5 you could sprinkle some on the tube steak too. Just make sure it's not meat tenderizer, that stuff will turn you purple!
Or was it a metric ruler? That might make a difference.
Damn it hof...if all else fails just make em look at it in a mirror you rip off your car...you know the one..."Objects in the mirror appear larger than they really are"
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AutumnSilk
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Feb 9 @ 12:26AM
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Hold on to your blogs
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Sugar_Lee
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Feb 18 @ 11:17PM
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Hof, I have been told that for every 20 pounds you lose you gain 2 inches....
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hoftner
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Feb 18 @ 11:21PM
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Sug'.......Im working
out right now thanx
for the"tip"
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Sugar_Lee
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Feb 26 @ 10:34AM
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Work Harder....or work HARD!
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Sugar_Lee
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Feb 26 @ 10:50AM
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Okay I was referring to body part not a person...
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Sugar_Lee
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Feb 27 @ 11:01AM
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ld
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Sugar_Lee
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Apr 28 @ 10:48AM
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so? how is the working out going? 
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