Today was our town's annual Almond festival, it's 35 miles of crafts, foods and vendors... lots of fun.
Somewhere around 5:00 my buddy Janet called to see if I wanted to go back uptown to see what was happening. I knew she meant going up to the one bar in town (not my normal thing) and I knew she would want to drink some. Not my usual thing either but dang it, sitting at home was so boring!!! So I tell her yes, I'll be ready when she gets here..
It's not like I did anything special to get ready. I had a glass of water before she got here and that's about it. Earlier, I had gone uptown to check on vendor booths for the chamber .... so I was clean and ready to go.
Janet came by and we walked the three blocks up to Main Street. We walked into our one and only bar in town... and there was my youngest son.... can you tell I don't do bars? He and his friends all dropped their jaws because I was in the bar.. oooohhhh heck, how do I handle this... slink off into the corner.. yea.. that'll do... so Janet & I go off to a corner. We sit there waiting for the bar tender to look up long enough to get our order in. A couple of women slightly older than we are, are sitting next to us... when I look up, a lot of young guys are raising a toast to me.. Janet asks me.. What they "heck" how come all the cute kids know you... do I dare tell her I was their preschool teacher?
The next thing I know we have SIX DRINKS each in front of us. WHAT THE HECK!!!
My song Graham looks at me and shrugs with a grin... I don't really know what to do but share the drinks I have..... when people (ok guys) come up and ask me where am I living now... and I tell them the same house I was living in 22 years ago, I wonder......where are you on my Thursday nights?
The music gets louder, the laughter gets higher... I look down to the end of the bar and holy CHIT... my X husband is sitting at the other end of the bar. Deep breaths 'cause my son is here... be calm, be normal so that it's ok for him. His fiancé Teri isn’t with him, she's only our son's mother-in-law... so I have to be gracious.. I have to be calm... I have to be a lady...
My BRATTY friend Janet just has to stir the pot... she goes to the other end of the bar to chat with the X and ask him "when is he getting married to the fiancé." He tells her that it's supposed to be next weekend but seeing me makes him think it's not such a good idea (trust me; being married to me wasn't such a good idea either). Dang it.. not my idea of funny to even go chat with him. Teri IS here… watch out ‘cause she could be bad news.
I tell Janet, I have to put the horses away... let's walk back to my house. No Janet... you can't drive (no car anyway 'cause we walked) Get the horses put away... ok, just because I'm not a coward, I'll go back to the bar with her.
DANG more kids I was either babysitter to or pre-school teacher for... Can I drink, sure I can... WATER...
What oh hello Dana (father of one of the kids who bought me a drink) Yes, I'm still living in town... Looking up.. WHAT THE HELL, my BOSS Kelly is here.... what is she doing here... talk about surreal...
Dana whispering he had a secret crush on me years ago when I was a MARRIED den mother when our kids were both Cub Scouts.... Asks me for a dance... looking up, there's his son Chase. Chase is as cute as his dad but Chase & my son were buddies... Dana and his wife were people I liked... I am barely dealing with ME being divorced after 10 years let alone someone flirting with me with MY X at the other end of the building... and then Dudley.. sweet almost always drunk Dudley is reaching out, touching my hair and saying "Marilyn.. (as if) Marilyn Monroe come to life for me..."
GET ME THE HELL OUT OF THERE!!!!!!!!
Janet and I go outside. Dudley follows, my boss KELLY (we're two of 25,000 university of CA Davis employees who just happen to end up in the same pace at the same time) follows...Dudley is trying to touch my hair and smell it... STOP TOUCHING ME... My boss says "She's telling you to back off dude.."
Just your basic surrealistic night in a small town.
Thank goodness I’m back safe n sound with you guys!
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| Bar scene: Heaven & Hell! |
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