It's a very sad fact that it's taken me to reach the ripe old age of 46 to realise what my Daddy told me was true. Men like nice girls.
The trouble is I was a nice girl whilst growing up - resulting in bullying by other girls, a number of boyfriends at school who dropped me like a hot potato because I didn't put out. The only long term relationship I ever had ended in divorce and infidelity on his part.
So after a long period of self reflection and celibacy I found myself in the very grown up position of being able to make my own choices when it came to men and how I behaved around them. My instincts had always been to flirt and enjoy the sexual banter, it exerted a kind of power in me which became almost addictive. Finally I'd found something to weave a magic spell with and surround myself with eligible men ripe for the picking.
How wrong can a girl be? It's hard to believe one can reach almost middle age and still be so naive. Men who are drawn to bad girls don't want a relationship - they don't even want regular sex with one person, they just enjoy the thrill of the chase and want to cut and run immediately after the conquest. Some men will say absolutely anything to get into a girls panties. They work out what it is we want to hear and then they pour it on with relish. They tap into the nice girl behind the bad girl, the part of her who wants to be loved, protected and adored for all time. The little girl in us who used to dress up in Mum's old net curtains and walk down the imaginary aisle might have grown up on the outside but inside she still wants the same things.
I've even had the nicest men tell me all men are only interested in sex. If this is true then are all the happy couples out there really in a minority? In contrast all of us observe couples in our daily lives and imagine they have so much more than us singletons. We can't know what goes on behind closed doors but when we see them walking hand in hand, chatting animatedly over dinner or stealing a kiss in the street that feeling of longing for what we don't have can be almost overwhelming.
I'm hoping because most of my experience of men has been on line that the good men are out there somewhere and internet dating is just something they've heard or read about. I actually feel a little sorry for the guys trawling the net for their jollies - where do they think it will take them in the end? If a guy's into his mid to late 30's and not even thinking about dating the same person or settling down with someone then I wonder what he thinks he's going to do in the future. He might still be attracting babes of all ages right now. Once he hit's 40 though, starts losing his hair, putting on weight or losing his muscle tone, suffering with stress, drinking too much at home, finds nights out with the boys tedious........ will that be the time he decides he'd really like to find a woman and settle down?
I guess maybe it could be said just because I wasn't right for these guys it doesn't mean they're not ready to settle down. This may be the case but the impression I got was they really weren't the guy they tried to convince me they were. I blame myself entirely for wanting to believe them and give them a chance. I don't have any regrets, what would be the point? .... but it's a shame sometimes we have to come full circle to realise what we already knew to be true.
So I guess I've learned my lesson. Don't get carried away with flirtation, passion and physical chemistry - it will only lead to a broken heart. I wish my Dad had been here to remind me, he could have saved me a lot of pain.
Angel has blogged ........... thanks for reading 
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| Keep Yer 'And On Yer 'Appenny! |
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Sugar_Lee
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Mar 31 @ 1:09PM
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Men are fickle...I think I have a blog about that! You think you have it tough..at my age there is nothing left to date. The good ones are taken. I'm going to go BI or become a NUN...   Okay forget that first one. The Nun suits me better, do I have to become Catholic?  
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mordru
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Mar 31 @ 1:15PM
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Never give up on love.Hell if I found someone to love my sorry butt.Anyone can.
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chris549547
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Mar 31 @ 1:57PM
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I'll marry all of you    
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mordru
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Mar 31 @ 2:09PM
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UH Chris,I DON'T THINK SO!
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jelltex
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Mar 31 @ 2:10PM
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In Mum's house when she was growing up, it was called Tuppence; but that could have been inflation.
Yes, here's the truth, many men like the thrill of the chase. I like what it says in High Fidelity, something about fed up going on gut insticts, because my guts have s**t for brains.
There are good and bad out there, and from my perspective, I saw women who were treated really badly by their partners, and they just let their man give them some more. I mean wandering eyes and all that. I really thought that those of us whp were nice were the ones doing something wrong.
Of course, finding the good ones in this modern age of the net, etc, it should be easy, but it's a darn sight harder.
Never give up, that's all i can say. Because there is someone out there. It's just knowing where.....
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redtigr
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Mar 31 @ 3:12PM
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Very wise, Angel, very wise indeed...
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stephendedalus
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Mar 31 @ 3:27PM
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Heck, I just want one person who is intelligent and honest. I was a child of the sexual revolution and I found all that polygamy stuff unnerving. I've always felt if I had a girlfriend, why would I need another? I think people do that because of ego. I really don't know why they do it, but it's all very foreign to me.
As far as only wanting sex, that seems boring. I want love and trust. I want to know that someone has my back, will stand by me in difficult times, as I would her. Sex is great only when I love somebody to the bottom of my heart. Otherwise, it's merely mutual masturbation.
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Blondino
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Mar 31 @ 4:01PM
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I will never loose faith that great men exist 
Be demoralised ...... check
Be sad ......... check
Be lied to ........ check , check
Be dumped ..... check
Be celibate ....... check
Give up hope ........ Never ......
To give up hope is to admit defeat ...... Bionic Angel
Get the armour on and lets go out searching
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Blondino
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Mar 31 @ 4:14PM
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and so ladies dont be disheartened ...because remember this ..............
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pantyinspector
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Apr 1 @ 9:51AM
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 define a bad lady please ...
i can speak for alot of guys that we AINT attracted to a ladies thats plays games , nor spends all my money , blags and lies her life away for her own selfish needs, doesnt entertain us etc etc  ....
Ok, depending on there gene type configuration [ie] if they have any / some or no female traits about them is how 1stly this guy will be , some men are full on macho , mans man , drink beer whistle at birds , male shoven pigs is a ladies term i think for them then you have the middle of the road type ,been born with a balanced male/female gene pattern, i have to say most guys fall into this bracket , then you get the still straight male who has been given less male and more female , comes across alot of the time atad camp , gets on well with wimen but the down point is doesnt show enough macho sercurity for a major % of ladies to be drawn to .. oviously the ones with near all female gene pattern bat for another team ? say no more there ... anyway ...
it works also for you ladies , gene patterns , just look around at your friends and think what group would you put them in , now look at there partners , life is balance , put to aggressive people together doesnt work , put to shy no speaking types together ? doesnt work ...
the moral of the story is OPPISITES ATTRACT : WHEN YOU KNOW YOURSELF THEN YOUR KNOW IF THE PERSON IS ALSO CORRECT FOR YOU .
nothing to do with bad girls good girls at all that stuff you learn and can be taught differently over time .. real attraction starts with self understanding 
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