Today April 5th, I HATE this day. On this day 18 years ago I gave birth to a son. I named him Andrew. He lived for 2 hours exactly. He had what is known as "Potter's Syndrome". I knew before he was going to be born that he would die, found out right before Christmas. I still wanted to continue with my pregnancy just so that I could see my baby & hold my baby. When he was born alive & crying the doctors had hope. But no matter what they did for his 1st hour of life they could not save him. I got him for the 2nd hour of his life. I HATE this day cuz even tho I gave birth to a sweet son, I lost him. Every April 5th my family & I light a candle & remember him, we take out the photos I have of him, show my other children the photos & talk about him.
Last night I was talking with my Mom & figured out why I will chat with teenage boys from another site, most all are Filipino. It is cuz I miss my teenage son, I can talk with them, advise them, let them know someone is there that cares to listen. It is something I can not do for my own teenage boy so I feel good about being there for others. Most all of them call me 2nd Mom. Makes it so that I don't miss my son quiet as much.
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