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Doormats That Don't Last A Twat

posted 4/17/2008 10:33:37 AM |
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tagged: choos
  misschoos

I’ve noticed a lot of ‘relationships’ are formed very quickly and are extremely undervalued with people declaring their undying love for one another, having sexual relations with people they have only just met and expecting commitment AFTERWARDS.

Don’t get me wrong, I’ve made a mistake before now, but I learned from it; what I learned was never to make that mistake again.

Some people just seem to be gluttons for this.

So, in the blink of an eye, they are single again (they were always single really), used, it didn’t work out, they are ‘heart broken,’ this one was ‘the one’ yet again…within a short amount of time however, after meeting their other ‘soul mate’ for the umpteenth time, they are READY to embark on yet another relationship.

They go straight onto a dating site, bleating out their story, for someone else to see that they are easy meat, sitting targets, waiting for the next ‘soul mate’ to come along.

Soul mates don’t come along that often, believe me, you might be lucky if you find one in a whole life time. There plenty of people looking for doormats though. But not the ones that 'don't last a twat.'





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Blogs by misschoos:
Where Love Lives On
All I Want Is You
Darkest Ever Night
S t o o p i d a s s Blog
An Online Quickie
Doormats That Don't Last A Twat
Top 10 Greats - Robert Palmer
Robert Palmer - Top Ten
...I Know Who I Am
A Small Hand Held Object


Comments:
BaNiNBoston

Apr 17 @ 10:38AM  
fenderchick

Apr 17 @ 10:41AM  
To me "twat" is another word for downstairs,lol.

I was single for over 4 yrs before I ventured near another man. I don't think people should wait that long, but at least give yourself a month or 2!
wandaful123

Apr 17 @ 10:42AM  
Don’t get me wrong, I’ve made a mistake before now, but I learned from it; what I learned was never to make that mistake again.

I suppose most have been there at some point. Sometimes we are fortunate and learn this lesson in our young lives. The lesson will keep repeating over and over till we get it right. Every one is on their own path and will get it in their own time.

There plenty of people looking for doormats though. But not one's that 'don't last a twat.'
Very good!
EmmeS61

Apr 17 @ 10:49AM  
I really don't know how some jump back in so quickly... I get cold feet. It is so important to become comfortable with yourself first. Each failed relationship has something to teach us. If we keep moving immediately from one to another, we fail to learn. ~JMHO

sweetgypsysoul

Apr 17 @ 10:53AM  
In all fairness .. just as many bossy, controlling women doing the same to the nice-guy types.
ladykay488

Apr 17 @ 11:02AM  
Soul mates don’t come along that often, believe me, you might be lucky if you find one in a whole life time.
This is very true! My thoughts on this blog about relationships is:..talk....meet.....know....then if it is the one then give your heart away!
madamegeek

Apr 17 @ 11:02AM  
I have to agree with you, Emme.

In the eight months since a relationship ended so sadly, I am shocked to see a couple of individuals having met FOUR soul mates in the same amount of time, while I am happy to count days when I note any decrease of sadness.

I can't help but feel that the advice to "jump back in the saddle" utilizes the appropriate part of the anatomy; I will wait to engage my heart, mind and soul.
jelltex

Apr 17 @ 11:05AM  
Some people seem to think that sex is the be and end all.

Others equate sex with love.

A certain J Lydon said sex was two minutes of squelshing noises.

Love lasts a lifetime.

Kudo.
DiamondRain

Apr 17 @ 11:06AM  
True ... It's so much better when you spend 10 years with someone, have kids with them, go through thick and thin with them and THEN split up. That makes a lot more sense.

After a lifetime of experience, I'm not really sure what the elusive thing some people call "soul mate" really means. I'd have to say that spending one good night of passion with someone, whether it is real or just a fantasy, can be as meaningful as long term "committed" relationship.

I have had a few one nighters that live in my memory as some of the most passionate, most special and most meaningful experiences of my life.

Yes, I've also had some long term relationships that were meaningful and special. But they had the distinction of ending with pain and hardship, something the one nighters never did.

If you want philosophy, I would say this:

We are only here for the blink of an eye anyway. What difference does it make whether a relationship lasts for the whole blink or only for one hundredth of that blink? What counts is the passion, the connection, the meaning and the power of the memory (which is all that is left in the end anyway).
misschoos

Apr 17 @ 11:06AM  
In the eight months since a relationship ended so sadly, I am shocked to see a couple of individuals having met FOUR soul mates in the same amount of time,
Classic
jerzygrl328

Apr 17 @ 11:07AM  
My feelings exactly...Kudos to ya, gf...
dallas1995

Apr 17 @ 11:11AM  
then there is that saying..."you gotta' kiss a lot of frogs" ...as long as the frog can kiss...there are always those that for what ever reason cannot manage relationships...IMO it is an individual choice...enjoy the ride
BaNiNBoston

Apr 17 @ 11:11AM  
In the eight months since a relationship ended so sadly, I am shocked to see a couple of individuals having met FOUR soul mates in the same amount of time,

This I love!!!!
jayej

Apr 17 @ 11:13AM  
just as many bossy, controlling women doing the same to the nice-guy types

I have to admit I have seen it go both ways too.

What gets me is the amount of sympathy that goes out for these people.
They do it to themselves over and over. So many times I have wanted to comment but when reading the other comments that run everywhere from
"what a jerk" to "you poor thing", ya kind of hate to pop in a burst a bubble.

J

PS your profile pic is cute
maneater

Apr 17 @ 11:18AM  
cancun1999

Apr 17 @ 11:21AM  
I am very picky and there have only been 2 men on here that I have felt a connection with and have let come into my life and that is within a two or more year period.. I certainly haven't slept with any of them...I was quick to trust and believe, but have learned a very valuable lesson from my last experience and will take ladykays advice from now on..Fool me once, fool me twiced, but not a third time..
kattsmeow

Apr 17 @ 12:09PM  
I have only dated one man from the internet. I married that man.

I too wonder how people can claim to have met their soul mate, over and over. ( different ones)

Good blog!!!
vettman454

Apr 17 @ 12:12PM  
I agree with you totally! I quit dating over 2 years ago now and I don't believe it is a such thing as a soulmate. It's love, like and lust and I think some people get those mixed up. Some are in love with the idea of being in love or wanting someone so badly in their life they are ready to jump at whatever comes along. Hell, I am old fashion and so damn picky I wouldn't even take my ownself out for I know I'm not my type. So wait, don't jump first and then say, I met another soul mate today.
Don't crawl into bed with whatever comes along or you may catch something you can not get rid of. Have some morrals and self respect and others will respect you too. Ok, thats my whole 2 cents worth.
Geesh,, dang.
wandaful123

Apr 17 @ 12:50PM  
I can't help but feel that the advice to "jump back in the saddle" utilizes the appropriate part of the anatomy;
Couldn't resist! Not that I agree or disagree, but thats just plain hilarious! Good for you madame!
inxs900

Apr 17 @ 1:00PM  
If I saw "looking for soul mate" I would automatically flee the scene.

This is a popular phrase used by many understood by few and the few who understand it never have use it.

Its kind of like the meaning of " twat" . In this country its never used or understood by the many, and the few who use it do not understand it.

Angel1964

Apr 17 @ 1:15PM  
I think people set their expectations too high.. So when they meet someone that makes them feel good.. They think… I’ve found the “ONE”… I’ve given up on that… I’m just looking for someone that really likes spending time with me… Yes, Sex is important.. But it isn’t he end all be all part of the relationship.. It should be the wine with your meal… not the meal itself…
Another great blog!
travelwoman

Apr 17 @ 1:35PM  

You are right, of course, and no one would say the contrary. But...

Does that mean that the people who are more careful are better? Somehow your blog suggests that...

And what bothers me is that you seem to put all those "bleeding heart" people into the same bucket (for the reason you give in your blog) but do not acknowledge the fragility of some (many) people who have never learned what a meaningful, loving relationship is. They never saw one.
They may be other motives, too.

So... they keep trying. They get hurt again and again.

Is that a reason to point the finger and almost make fun of them with sentences like :
So, in the blink of an eye, they are single again (they were always single really), used, it didn’t work out, they are ‘heart broken,’ this one was ‘the one’ yet again…within a short amount of time however, after meeting their other ‘soul mate’ for the umpteenth time, they are READY to embark on yet another relationship

As much as I generally like your blogs, for this one... I don't think one should spit on the weak.... Sorry.
.
530Meliss

Apr 17 @ 1:50PM  
Isn't anyone else shocked by the T word used in the title of ths blog? I don't even get how it relates to the blog?
travelwoman

Apr 17 @ 1:56PM  

Meliss...

You are so right. I did not focus on that word until now because English is not my mother tongue and I did not know the exact meaning of "twat".

Now, I looked it up, and here is what Wikipedia says...

The word Twat has various meanings, dependent upon regional dialect. Although its main meaning in British English is usually that of 'idiot' or 'stupid/idiotic/tasteless' (male person), it is understood in American English (and elsewhere including Britain) as a vulgar synonym for the human vulva,[1] vagina, or clitoris, and is used as a derogatory epithet.

Right on...

Holy are thosen who never did wrong.... or something like that, ain't it?

Why spitting on the weak???? Does that make you feel better...???

travelwoman

Apr 17 @ 1:57PM  

Holy are thosen who never did wrong.... or something like that, ain't it?

Why spitting on the weak???? Does that make you feel better...???

This was of course meant for misschoos, not Meliss...
.
redtigr

Apr 17 @ 1:59PM  


misschoos, you's way naughtier than me...

BaNiNBoston

Apr 17 @ 2:01PM  
T..word..........Although its main meaning in British English is usually that of 'idiot' or 'stupid/idiotic/tasteless' (male person).....
travelwoman

Apr 17 @ 2:01PM  

and all those kudos...

can you believe it?

for deliberately stomping on those who obviously already have a self-worth problem....
jayej

Apr 17 @ 2:18PM  
I don't think one should spit on the weak

I don't think she is spitting on the weak at all.

relationships’ are formed very quickly / extremely undervalued / declaring their undying love / it didn’t work out / they are ‘heart broken / meeting their other ‘soul mate’ for the umpteenth time / they are easy meat / sitting targets
I think she is merely pointing out that some people set themselves up for failure.
They are not learning anything from their experiances.

people who have never learned what a meaningful, loving relationship is
If they do not know what a loving relationship is ...trying once and failing, yes, trying twice and failing maybe, but to continue to do the same things, should have taught them something. It is like putting your hand in a fire, how many times does it take for your to understand you are going to get burned?

It is like the little boy who cried wolf, how many times should people "sympathize" or in radical cases "vilianize" the other party they were involved with? When they themselves have put themselves in that position.
stephendedalus

Apr 17 @ 2:19PM  
I was raised in an environment of monogamy. My parents met during World War II, my dad was in the Marines, stationed in Chicago before he was sent to the South Pacific. They met at the Trianon Ballroom and danced to the big band music of Lawrence Welk and his orchestra (when Welk was hip) and corresponded through the war, then married in 1945. They were together 50 years, my mother died 2 days after their fiftieth anniversary. My father never even thought of remarrying, he passed away in 2006. I think he was ready to rejoin her.

As a hippie kid in the seventies, many of my peers practiced free love, open marriages, stuff like that. It never made much sense to me, I always felt that if I had a sweetheart, why would I need another? I never married, I had several live in long term realtionships. I almost married once, to a fantastic woman who I almost had a child with. She miscarried at four and a half months. That was very traumatic for us both and we shortly afterward decided to part as friends.

I don't know if I'll ever meet that "one" person or not. I've met some cool people here, but I've given up expecting anything more than chatting and deciding we live too far apart. I still have hope, but life happens spontaneously, never forced, so what will be will be.
You never know. I'm still optimistic.

I'm kind of a weird fit, like a pair of purple saddle oxfords. Not everybody's cup of tea, I'm afraid...

The point I'm making is that people should mean more than that. More than just a twat, as it were...
hellosue

Apr 17 @ 2:52PM  
It may depend on the person's definition of "love". Some people may equate a great sexual adventure as love because it feels so good. Some people may think having someone to talk to, listen to, enjoy daily rituals, and share their dreams with is pure love.

We don't know each others minds and we are not mind readers, so we don't know exactly what someone means when they say they are in love, or found their soul mate. But if they are happy in the meantime, does it matter? Are we here to be happy? I am!!

Good blog!!
Classy_Blonde

Apr 17 @ 3:22PM  
I had a friend once who had named her Chihuahua "Twat". Said the dog's breath smelled like one.

So I'm out there in left field. What I wanted to say has already been said by many, so I thought I'd lighten things up instead.

CHARLIgurl1

Apr 17 @ 4:22PM  
Theres a huge difference between love and lust..and unfortuately, many get the 2 confused.. what they feel is love and actually saying so is no more than deep sexual attraction.
edthepoet

Apr 17 @ 4:45PM  
Yes, I so totally agree 100% with your blog and some people really got upset with me over that.

Though I am blessed,because the truth of what you said always comes back to haunt though type dreamers, because it truly take time to learn, compromise and accept that person for who they are.

People confuse soul mates for playmates
MuchTooNiceGal

Apr 17 @ 5:09PM  
Good blog and worth a Kudo!
By the way, if I may be so bold as to ask....
what happened to your wedding to IAM????
The story just stopped... it seems.
illusion790

Apr 17 @ 5:56PM  
great blog! I learned from my mistake as well. I can't understand why SO many people blog and tell every detail of their dates/relationships/personal stuff? I personally, don't care. JMO
onoudn

Apr 17 @ 6:00PM  
So is it better to be a twat or a twit....and what is a twit anyway....
onoudn

Apr 17 @ 6:02PM  
Oh BTW we didn't see your twin last visit to the Strat....sorry.....but she is a real person I swear...
mystery2u888

Apr 17 @ 7:39PM  
As usual another brillant blog.........somethings are meant to be kept under wraps................ and for the heart......to be kept safe.......nobody wants to get hurt......and the fear... ....of being vulnerable.....and going .......there too quickly.........is to each adult.......of course......lessons learned........... and then you move forward........





xoxo



Excellent......You always manage to hit it right on the nail........ ......
TroutFishing

Apr 17 @ 8:07PM  
I do not believe in soul mates. I believe in choices.

We CHOOSE to allow someone to be as wonderful as the day we met them.

We ACCEPT them forever, even when they change, as change is inevitable.

Attraction happens. Love only grows over time, it is never love in an instant.

Thank you for writing this blog. I have seen many claim love with people they
have yet to meet in person. That's sad.


atropos319

Apr 17 @ 8:25PM  
This whole "twat" debate reminds me of a certain Monty Python sketch about a Hungarian Phrase Book ... but anyway ...

Really folks, American English - and its ever-evolving slang - is not the only English spoken on the planet. Vulgarity in this case is subjective.

Besides, all I really want to know is ... who are you again?



PullMyFinger

Apr 17 @ 8:34PM  
^^
The Hungarian phrase meaning 'Can you direct me to the station?' is translated by the English phrase, 'Please fondle my bum'.

Heh.....classic.

Brilliant Choos.....some people ya know?



missliss78

Apr 17 @ 9:01PM  
I'm not certain I got the exact meaning of this blog...but I feel compelled to say this.....

When I care deeply for someone & that relationship ends, it takes me some time to "recuperate" so to speak. Monogamy is key in any relationship that I am in & my feelings do not have an "off" and "on" switch...they have to heal to some degree before I can go forward.
Super1000x

Apr 17 @ 9:54PM  
Are you talking about Vgirl and Sky???
misschoos

Apr 18 @ 7:52AM  
Are you talking about Vgirl and Sky???

No, I am not talking about anyone in particular, male or female.
I am talking about relationships in general.
Palomino

Apr 19 @ 8:46PM  
Hmmm....I thought she was talking about twats. Now I made a ridiculous reply to that post.
SunBabe

Apr 20 @ 1:50AM  
I should have know that only misschoos could have gotten more mileage out of that kitchen rug/doormat post. I have to admit that it was too good to leave on the forum floor.

Sometimes it's a temptation to think about jumping into a relationship (and I've done it a time or two...some fun, some heartache) but the feeling of being treated like a doormat in the end definitly opened my eyes.

I'd never say don't give it a try, because I DO believe in soulmates and I DO believe people can find their love on the net...but whatever kind of relationship someone chooses to look into, I'd suggest they be realistic and NOT to base their interest on fantasies and imagined expectations. And it IS possible to thouroughly enjoy and share those initial feelings of "twitterpation", butterflies and euphoria while being realistic and pragmatic. I've seen it over and over again (as well as the revolving door[mat] situations). When a couple is realistic, even if the relationship doesn't work out as they hoped, they've each had a good time -- they at least tried -- and hopefully made a great new friend. They don't need to whine and cry (that's the difference).
mystery2u888

Apr 20 @ 7:55PM  
Sunbabe.........excellent.... ............sooo well thought out........I knew you would have a very good insight .......

Pali......... you and I will talk later......


xoxo
catman602

Apr 21 @ 7:57AM  
I wonder . could she be talking about me ? I jump from the freinds thing straight to relationship . IF , woman think of this as " he's the next man " go for it . after sex . IF , you have sex with me . I will be your doormat , , toy , whatever you want . IF , a woman has sex with me , there must be someonething between us . I know I am a easy target, easy lay whatever you call men like me .
PullMyFinger

May 1 @ 7:43PM  
I wish someone would write a blog about me...I feel so..inadequate.....unappreciated.

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Doormats That Don't Last A Twat