So it is mother's day and for some reason, my ex husband has decided he needs to make peace. I'm sitting at my kitchen table chatting with his girlfriend and secretly hating both of them for their endless puffing on those smokes. It smells so good I can't even yell at them.
He asks me step outside, he has something he wants to give me. I look at his girlfriend...then at my daughter. I want to mouth the words "If I'm not back in 15 minutes, call the police". But I know my daughter won't get the whole message. In fact, she will just assume I have given her permission to take my car out for a drive.
I go out and he asks me to step to the back of his truck and inside are about 7 boxes. My handwriting on the outside of them. I'm totally confused and ask him what the heck they are. "Shit I stole from you when you left" he says. What? He tells me that he tried to hurt me every chance he got back then (now there's a surprise) and when I was moving out, he stole a bunch of my boxes.
Hmmm, interesting. And when I think about it, most men would have either opened them at some point or at least thrown them away so as to not have to look at their sins every time they went into their attic.
I slide one out and open it up. Shoes. Son of a Bitch! That's where they all went. He TOOK MY FLIPPING SHOES! How can I go from thinking this is humorous to wanting to stab him in the eye with a pencil?
The next box I rip open a bit to hard and it tips over. Out roll two baby bottles. This small box is packed with bibs, a few bottles, baby spoons and other assorted necessities. "Oh fvck" he says. I look at him and his head is all the way down to his chest. He feels like dirt, and well he should. I remember working with two darn bottles when I left, all my baby supplies gone, fallen off the truck somewhere. To broke to purchase more.
How can I be angry, how can I hate when his guts are getting ripped out? "Andy....it's over. Your not a bad man, you just do bad things. No go get Kathy and take her out for a nice lunch. And treat her GOOD for cripes sake!"
He looks at me and he is actually fighting off tears. The man has harbored a great deal of hatred for no reason. And in the end...he didn't really hurt me. He hurt my daughter with this stupid move, and he was forced to see himself as a lowly thief. He's come a long way. As a human being and a man.
He hands me a package. My mothers day present. He admits that he and my daughter had quite the fight in Wal-Mart. He wanted to get me yet another coffee mug or a lily plant. My daughter refused to participate. "It's not want she WANTS. Don't you know her at all?" And she showed that you can still inherite a stubborn streak from your mom even if your adopted She stomped to the back of the store and tried to buy me the CD I wanted. In the end, Andy had to do it...adult content and all that jazz.
And yeah, SHE gets me. I may be mom, but I'm a woman too. And I have a life seperate from her. From him, and even everyone I know. She sees me when others don't. She's seen a few pictures she probably shouldn't have. And she gets it. A woman has many sides, and she is learning that it's her RIGHT to be multifaceted. And I'm proud of her for telling that man that he had better start looking around him. It's not all about what he wants...it's about making the people around you happy. Testify baby girl! And thanks for the Kid Rock CD too.
And like he says on the CD.....
Get on your knees, I'm your rock and Roll Jesus
It's all sex, drugs, rock n roll
A soul sensation that you can't control
And you can see I practice what I preach
I'm your rock n roll Jesus
Yes I am
I'm your Rock and roll Jesus
Happy Mother's day girls. I hope you all got what you wanted, and not what others wanted you to have.
Copy & paste to friend: (Click inside box; Ctrl + C to copy; Ctrl + V to paste)
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read more blogs!
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Blogs by LaughTillYaPuke:
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sciurusniger
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May 12 @ 5:09PM
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Let's hear a rousing, "AMEN!"
~*~
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PsychoMagnet
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May 12 @ 5:18PM
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Yet another great post . . .(shorter than usual - I like that).
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EternalFlame
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May 12 @ 5:20PM
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~*~
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misschoos
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May 12 @ 5:22PM
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What you 'Bring To The Table' is always original and unique.
I love it.
I can't always leave comments that are well worded, because I am not always at my PC, but always read you, and mostly leave a seagull ~*~ and nothing else.
Wanna do a deal on kudos? 
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WouldntItBeGr8To
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May 12 @ 5:26PM
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AMEN!!
AND YEAH!!!!
Life is good, ain't it!!!
Kids get it 
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missliss78
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May 12 @ 5:37PM
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Another great read. Hope you enjoy the CD! ~*~
Good on the ex for working out his 'tude, too. It will be better for everyone!
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PullMyFinger
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May 12 @ 5:42PM
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I agree with Roger, very good blog and yes, shorter.
Now, if you can get the whole damn thing down to 2, maybe 3 paragraphs, I'll leave a kudo.
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LaughTillYaPuke
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May 12 @ 5:42PM
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Actually, we get along great. We have for years. I think the guilt while looking at those boxes was killing him.
And I'm a firm believer in karma. One of those boxes wasn't mine. It was his. 21 rock concert t-shirts that have never been worn. (until today) My daughter brought down the house at school today wearing a David Bowie glittery T-shirt from 1978.
I will be wearing the Alice Cooper tomorrow, then I think the Anna and Nancy Wilson, or perhaps Ted Nugent. The oldest one is from 1980. ZZ Top I believe.
And yes, I will return them, but I'm going to take a few pictures first...maybe even post a few here. Wheeeee! 
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teddybearagain
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May 12 @ 5:46PM
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Applause for two reasons.
Your blog as always my lady is superb!
Second, to your ex. It takes a hell of a man IMO to "step up" and
"release the guilt" so to speak.
My ex is alcoholic. About a year after we divorced he called and took
me out for dinner. At dinner, told me "thank you", .."thank you" for
taking care of our kids, and me.
It is indeed a good feeling when they say that to us.
Happy Mom's Day !
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SunBabe
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May 12 @ 5:51PM
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~*~  ~*~
I've got to say that I've enjoyed observing the "lessons" my ex finally absorbed both during and since our divorce. I think it's made him a happier person who now actually enjoys life and I wish him and his lady well. 
I really give a lot of credit to our kids, too, for opening up his eyes. As an "observer", he's seen how they've managed to adapt themselves to not repeat the "mistakes" their parents made. All in all, pretty cool.
I think this weekends experiences with your daughter and with you may have helped your ex become a better man and human being (hopefully ). Sometimes, even after the divorce, the ex-spouse has a valuable purpose... 
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mailorderannie
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May 12 @ 5:58PM
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An AMEN from the back pew.
Those boxes are baggage that's he's carried with him all these years too. And its only fitting that YOU got the box of T-shirts. Post pics you rock-n-roll mother!
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grumblebear
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May 12 @ 6:00PM
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Thank you, 
you share so many pieces of yourself, baring your soul, sharing this powerful moment with us.... thank you
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fenderchick
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May 12 @ 6:09PM
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I think he learned his lesson. One of my ex's stole all my pants one time?????
People are weird sometimes 
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cartay25
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May 12 @ 7:02PM
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At least he is trying..........that's a major improvement in itself. Yay to your daughter for winning the fight to get you what you wanted. My son knows me well. He got me a huge bag of Dove chocolates for Mothers Day.
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kattsmeow
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May 12 @ 7:25PM
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Bravo!!!!
This is one of those blogs from you that I can't seem to find the words for.
~*~
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redtigr
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May 12 @ 9:35PM
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~*~
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oceanlover734
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May 12 @ 10:40PM
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You are always such fun to read! Even the sad ones you bring laughter to. ~*~
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blkfoot1954
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May 12 @ 11:06PM
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*~*...Amen
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beckyiv42000
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May 13 @ 5:45AM
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Laugh... i know about seeing the guilt in his eyes.. karma does rock. been there done that  ..
and excuse me but I cant believe you didn't take one of them shoes to his head... stealing a womans shoes for fks sake wth is wrong with that man??? thats akin to stealing her chocolate at that time of the month sheeeeeeeesh
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suzzieq356
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May 13 @ 7:36AM
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~*~
Keep them coming ....You so rock!
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EternalFlame
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May 13 @ 8:11PM
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*huggles*
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Gemologist57
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May 13 @ 9:15PM
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Hey Meems:
Reminded Me of some very difficult conversations that I have had over the last few days - Regarding the dangers and the damages caused by Men - or Women - who fail, or are unable, to communicate... I kept hearing the phrase "A Man's Man" doesn't need to communicate to dominate a situation... I say "A Man's Man" - A Man that is truly strong, Rather than controling or dominating; A man that is truly intelligent, Rather than being prideful in the greatness He sees in Himself, Should be able to communicate rather than intimidate... But apparently I'm wrong... I think it goes back to what many of Us Men heard as little boys... Men don't show emotions - The "Smile and the world smiles with You, Frown and You frown alone" mentality... Your husband screwed up - By taking Your things and upsetting Your Daughter, But in His mind, until recently anyway, if He admitted that to himself, or You, then He would have to admit he was not the "Man's Man" He thought He was... He IS growing and becoming a better man...
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pamdemonium
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May 15 @ 5:06PM
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The Way of the Small. I love you.
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