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"When you have no basis for an argument, abuse the plaintiff." -- Marcus Tullius Cicero
To me, true love is the sweetest thing in life, and that is why we are either in love or looking for it. We all have that sweet tooth that craves that which will satisfy it. Sometimes it is necessary that we need to work toward that love, even when it is present in our lives, because life has a way of getting in the way and trying to prevent or stymie those love waves from sweeping into our souls.
I've blogged before about the old couple I met while grocery shopping and how much their little touches meant to one another. They laughed at little things and when I was in line at the checkout they were in front of me, still holding hands and giggling. They struck up the conversation with me about how they fell in love and vowed to keep working to keep that flame alive. They never denied for one moment that there were not times that they felt they did not "like" the other, but they knew these were moments of anger, of frustration of doubt because of the ISSUE they were facing, not because of something the other did to perpetrate that problem, but because as humans we lose our tempers, we get angry, we stomp, we shout, we curse. The secret, as they told me, was to remember it was NOT their partner that made these ISSUES arise, but life! So why take it out on the very one person you love? They acknowledged that it took time to realize that they were doing what we all do when we are angry, frustrated... the one person that is the constant in our lives because we CHOSE them as such is the receiver of the venting. They discovered that they were both guilty of such when they almost called their marriage quits and were talking about why with a counselor.
I believe, at least it is my opinion, that the quote from Mr. Cicero stands true in merit in these instances. Have you ever noticed that in a debate or a group of friends even when there are certain hot topics introduced and each party that has their own opinion, when they cannot find concrete basis for their argument, turn the debate, the conversation over to accusatory of the other?
Love is not meant that one partner be right and the other wrong in the issues that encroach them in life. When they find a way to come to terms with a solution to the problem without pointing fingers, without abusing (either verbally or physically) the other, then they can weather any tempest, face any storm, hand-in-hand and face on. The common denominator in being able to be the gladiator in life's battles is working on a cool, well thought out and shared plan of attack of what is causing the battle, not sparring with your partner.
There is always a reason for love, that cannot be explained by any other means that I have in my being, except to say that you cannot control what your heart feels. You can walk away from the feeling, you can stifle it, you can try to change it, but in the end, you will taste the bitterness of defeat. You cannot change the way you feel, you cannot love someone you don't feel comfortable with, you cannot change the other person to be that "standard" you have of the exact type of partner you want in life, and you cannot make another person feel love toward you. But once you do find someone that makes you comfortable from the exact moment you meet, can make you laugh while you are crying, understand that what you have is precious, it is a gift, and work at keeping it.
I am not saying to stay in abusive relationships, to try to reason with a partner who is unwilling to listen to that voice of reason, to someone that is addicted to a substance they love more than you and will not willingly give it up, to stay with someone that constantly cheats on you (I realize that those people do not love the one person they claim to or themselves.. again this is an addictive behavior in my eyes) or any other situation where you risk your very life. What I am saying is, if you can look inside your heart and still feel love, then why just be so easy to sign on that dotted line voiding the warranty?
Peace out... from this ole hippie chick....Happy Sunday yall...
Gramps: THE RANCHERS WIFE
A successful rancher died and left everything to his devoted wife.
She was a very good-looking woman and determined to keep the ranch,but knew very little about ranching, so she decided to place an ad in the newspaper for a ranch hand.
Two cowboys applied for the job. One was gay and the other a drunk.
She thought long and hard about it, and when no one else applied she decided to hire the gay guy, figuring it would be safer to have him around the house than the drunk.
He proved to be a hard worker who put in long hours every day and knew a lot about ranching.
For weeks, the two of them worked, and the ranch was doing very well.
Then one day, the rancher's widow said to the hired hand, 'You have done a really good job, and the ranch looks great.
You should go into town and kick up your heels.'
The hired hand readily agreed and went into town one Saturday night.
One o'clock came, however, and he didn't return. Two o'clock and no hired hand.
Finally he returned around two-thirty, and upon entering the room, he found the rancher's widow sitting by the fireplace with a glass of wine, waiting for him.
She quietly called him over to her. 'Unbutton my blouse and take it off,' she said. Trembling, he did as she directed. 'Now take off my boots.' He did as she asked, ever so slowly. 'Now take off my socks.' He removed each gently and placed them neatly by her boots. 'Now take off my skirt.' He slowly unbuttoned it, constantly watching her eyes in the fire light. 'Now take off my bra.' Again, with trembling hands, he did as he was told and dropped it to the floor.
Then she looked at him and said,
'If you ever wear my clothes into town again, you're fired.'
( P.S. I didn't see it coming, either.)
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| The sweetest thing in life... and this is not related.. but..the rancher's wife |
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