I'm going through one of those intensely-deep-thinking-what-is-the-meaning-of-life-anyways kind of weeks. When I have been able to, I have withdrawn into my head, and my heart, to do some deep soul searching in hopes of finding the answers I've been seeking. I'm not sad nor depressed... neither am I joyful and happy. I feel as if I'm in limbo somewhere... sometimes the 'observer' sometimes the 'participant'.
Never really quite sure anymore if I'm where I'm suppose to be at this point in my life and in the end, does it all really matter anyways?
In a few moments I'm off to go visit my brother & sister-in-law having been invited into their home for a 4th of July cook-out family gathering. Once again the invitation was extended to me last night... always last minute - that's them. I'm way past the point of being annoyed or irritated by this last minute rush rush habit of theirs. 'Acceptance' - I believe that's where I am concerning that part of my family. They will never change and they aren't doing it on purpose... it's simply 'who they are' and that's that!
I went to the Tim Mc Graw concert at Blossom Wednesday night with my son. We set up a blanket on a hill overlooking the entire area and it was beautifully warm with a nice breeze. My idea of a perfect summer's night... great company, wonderful weather, fantastic music - you could 'feel' the energy from the crowd in the air and at times, I merged with it... felt the 'ONENESS' of it all and had a moment's clarity of knowing and in a blink of an eye - it disappeared again. I think I'm getting use to this.
I hesitate to cut this short - we so seldom have an opportunity these days to open up & talk our truest thoughts but I must be on my way to the gala event! lol I hope you have a magic-filled weekend my friends.
Love,
Theresa
P.S. I had a dream about an old lover last night... dreamed he wasdelivering to our store where I work and I heard the 'buzz' that he was in the one of the aisle merchandising the product because the company he works for was short handed. I turned off my light at the cash register and slipped over to the that aisle for a quick 'hello' and to sneak in a hug. The minute that he & I embraced, that low subtle energy that lays dormant beneathe the surface in us ignited into flames and suddenly we couldn't get enough of each other. The kisses, the touching, a need longing to be filled. In a matter of a moment we had melted to the floor, oblivious to our surroundings. And then I awoke! lying there in the dark, my eyes searching for a clue of him until I focused in on reality and realized it was merely another one of 'those' dreams. I slowly closed my eyes, pulling the blanket a little tighter to me, my hands clutched at my heart as I drifted back off to sleep.
Copy & paste to friend: (Click inside box; Ctrl + C to copy; Ctrl + V to paste)
|
|
read more blogs!
Blogs by Elbereth529:
|
|
|
|
|
| ...in the end, does it all really matter anyways? |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|