Ok, so many of my blogs are rants from the darkside... I don't always feel that way. but there are times where something will open that door, and I feel a need to release pressure...
There are many times where joy is the force of the moment in my life, I forget that I need to share that with people, rather than jealously hoarding it to myself...
I'm too used to the idea of scribbling out dark and depressing thoughts into notebooks, to be burned on bonfires, or shredded and lost to the world... I forget people actually read these things, and take them to heart...
I've always been a solitary soul, sure there have been a few friends, but as a rule, its always been me against the world, I never fit in with the crowds and cliques... I've always had the attitude, "This is who I am, F--k you, if you don't like it"... I didn't win any popularity contests...
I've mellowed over time... I quit drinking just before I got out of the Navy, I had a bad habit of starting fights with a half dozen marines, or who ever my insanity picked that evening... I never drank for enjoyment, or for social aspects, I drank to pass out... to become numb...
People who know me now cannot comprehend the beast I was. The damage I did, the pain I caused to family and friends...
When people first see me, they are intimidated, 6 foot 5 inches, 400 lbs, hair teeth and toenails... my friends laugh, because they know the side that has the 20lb ball of fuzz I call "Magic", or who takes his nieces to the movies, etc...
but inside, I'm still the kid who rode his bicycle down the hill no handed, screaming, "Yippee"
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Blogs by grumblebear:
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| wandering thoughts and explainations... |
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scorpiogirl36
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Jul 15 @ 10:15PM
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but inside, I'm still the kid who rode his bicycle down the hill no handed, screaming, "Yippee"
Guess we need to go back to those times.... 
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buatbu
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Jul 15 @ 10:25PM
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I still am a kid. I will never grow up.
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wandaful123
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Jul 15 @ 10:31PM
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God Mikey, I really do Love you!
Thanks for sharing, thanks for being you... Now seeings how it's tomorrow on the rock... I really, really am off to bed!
(probably a good thing the phone died...  )
Yipeeeee!!! I'm riding with you my friend...
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missliss78
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Jul 15 @ 10:37PM
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 Another good one!
You should definitely blog more often~
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Loreli
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Jul 15 @ 10:54PM
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Thank you for sharing.
I, for one, am happy to see that you took on a gentler side.
There is too much hateful talk....I have never seen you be that way.
A few could take lessons from you in self-control and respect! 
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maggiemae684
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Jul 15 @ 10:59PM
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I've always had the attitude, "This is who I am, F--k you, if you don't like it"...
That in itself says why I have such a soft spot for you....you stole my motto....  Even in your darkest moments your light shines through....because you are real, because you are sincere, because you are you....  ....and that is what makes you special to me.... 
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EternalFlame
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Jul 15 @ 11:29PM
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Yea...what she said ^^^ and the one above her...and above her....and...
Oh hell...I second everything said here.
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keeno
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Jul 15 @ 11:42PM
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hey mike, thanks for sharing. i used to have a drinking buddy named "tiny"he used get me out of the trouble i had gotten us into. oh the bad old days, just so many good memories now.... 
~*~
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jadedbtch
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Jul 16 @ 12:17AM
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Sounds like you are at peace with that monster now! I am trying very hard to become peaceful with mine! I deep down inside don't want to be the jadedbtch anymore. I have come along way but I do have more roads to travel before the monster is buried for good! Was just wondering if you have any advice to offer?
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kattsmeow
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Jul 16 @ 11:52AM
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Ah, see, anyone that can sing the " Oscar Meyer" song like you did, will always being going "Yipee"
~*~
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Palomino
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Jul 18 @ 5:13AM
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I'm not tellin' what I did in my younger days. Perhaps not what I did in my 40's, either! 
Loved your blog, Mike. ~*~
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