Men can "bond" among ourselves, hug, share, even cry a little. But with another guy there's is still the barrier we men tend to keep up between. It's not so much the care when a man and a woman are talking---at least not for me. A case in point is last night with a lady that I've seen in the AA/NA circles but never really sat down with and talked because of her bf. Well they are separated now and I saw her in the bar. ( yeah I know i just mentioned going to AA/NA meeting and being in a the bar in the same paragraph).
We started talking about kids. She asked me if I had any and I told her my sad story about a "drinking buddy" lady friend that may have had my child but I don't know where she is. I've seen the child just once and she has my eyes and my lips. Then the lady just vanished of the face of the earth. I've done searches on Internet, public records, and I always seem to just miss her some how. I can only guess that it's not accidental. I think about the her everyday; my little girl. I wonder how it most feel for her to not have her dad in her life, what her moms tells her about me, and even the fact that she may not even be mine.
Now I have told my friend that are male this story. But it never got to me the way that it did telling a woman. Why ? Well for one this woman could speak from a mothers point of view as well as an adult that grew up without her father around. In her case her dad died of cancer. So she went through a period where she blamed herself thinking that God took her dad because she was bad. We had a good sit down, cried a little, and exchanged phone numbers. She even gave me a couple of suggestion about finding the mom that I hadn't tried. I felt like a big burden had been taken of my shoulders and I know I could have never opened up the way I did with another guy. So here's to women for all you do to put up with us men and all the macho bs.
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