where like most if not all humans, i have spent a considerable amount of my life trying to discover answers to questions humankind has been asking about its own existence since before we began to record them. indeed, those questions were likely the impetus for the invention of letters, art, and the sciences.
“why am I here?”
“is there a plan/a set of rules I should live by?”
“is there a god?’”
“what happens to us after we die?”
“is there a religion that teaches the truth about these questions?”
along the way, i experienced Catholicism, familiarized myself with buddism, 7th day Adventists, baptists, experimented with transcendental meditation, drugs, esp, and even looked into the possibility that earth was seeded by beings from other planets. I read about voodoo and the Anastasie Indians, Hinduism and Wicca, and so on.
those explorations produced no solid answers. so, i clothed myself in the disdaining garb of atheism. it seemed the least sense-offending answer, and offered endless opportunities to feel superior!
that was that!
…until I was forced (as we all are) to endure the first losses of loved ones. Then, remaining stalwart in my conviction that there is no god (or God), no plan or code of ethics handed down from on high, no reward or punishment for a life lived virtuously or corrupt became increasingly difficult. Being human, thus frail I longed for more reason, more hope.
however, I am not, nor have I ever been one to believe based on faith, or the word of other equally flawed humans. nor am I likely to give credence to writings presented as fact simply because they were written a long time ago.
one of the methods I use to understand complex concepts is to reduce them into smaller; hopefully more easily understood components. great minds grasp great things, in one awe-inspiring, world changing lunge. i, made of humbler stuff, look for logic and reason in the bits and pieces that, when combined in the proper order make up great truths. as it is with most truths, one answer was hiding in plain sight.
to believe that the universe, vast and unimaginably complex is the result of mere chance stretches credibility beyond what I consider reason. therefore, it must be the result of an act of creation.
more to come, i hope!
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