The Flow of Thoughts
I just had a flow of thoughts while cleaning my toilet. I have been single for some 10 years. And before that I was married with 3 children for 20 years. That is half of my life. What ever did I do before that? Well the first fifteen years of my life I lived on a rural farm, let’s just say a farm without the benefit of indoor plumbing. Then I was the son of a single mother. I didn’t learn to clean a toilet until I joined the army. Really I never actually thought of doing it or really being exposed to one that needed it. How many single guys really are?
So after the army came a string of room mates and relationships and occasions when the toilet needed cleaning. I always thought I rose to those times of need and cleaned the damn thing. As I did tonight at 2:30 am.
When I was married I found times when it needed some attention and did what needed to be done. My wife found fault with that. She would get angry with me and take personal offense that I would do it before she did or before she found it in a soiled state. This behavior always baffled me.
So tonight I cleaned to toilet, it needed it. No one will see it in it’s now sparkling condition. No one will complain about it or wonder when the last time it was done. I dare say no one would have been afraid to “bare their bum” to it either before or after.
It needed to be done.
My life is one of simplicity. I think that puzzles many people I have contact with. I work with my hands and sharp tools. Although my daughter often reminds me I need to shave before I go to town. She say I have an unkempt look. That baffles me too.
Life is good up here alone in the mountains, surrounded by God’s creation. No one to distract me with alien thoughts or complaints. But then there’s no one to share the sight of and eagle soaring or an osprey catching a fish. That thought used to sadden me, but I find myself having it less.
We each have found our own joys and sorrows. We have each realized what we will tolerate in another. Each of us knows when the toilet needs to be cleaned.
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equuisdancer
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Oct 7 @ 7:06AM
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marylou
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Oct 7 @ 7:19AM
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I can relate to some of what you are saying. I have a female friend whose husband wont mow the lawn...ever....the grass is up to the fence almost......but he wont mow it. It causes many arguments....puts an every day strain on the r/ship. I told her to pay a gardener to do it......it might cost money......but feel it is the lesser of two evils......at least there will be harmony..... 
I think we all live on our mountains....and wishe we had someone to share it with. Its good that you can come to terms with the aloneless and how things are. Many just cant......and its an everyday heartache to them......noit having anyone to share things with.
Thanks for sharing! 
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ragtopcookie
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Oct 7 @ 9:22AM
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Theres alot to say about staying single......makes more and more since for me everyday......cookie
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CrackerJackPat
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Oct 7 @ 9:45AM
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What is it about you "mountain men" that makes me just want to reach out &  you? ! Why it is of course, your introspection. That mountain top of yours is a wonderful place to sit in all of its serenity. There is, however, a fine line that one can cross over into an "avoidance" of life. There is so much beauty you have to share, please don't keep it just up there on your mountain top.
As we all know, "Life is difficult" as stated in The Road Less Traveled. The act of shaving that somewhat baffles you? It is merely clearing the path of unapproachable bristles. "Life" is also risky. When you are "approachable," someone may find you and you may want to share your mountain top. You also know of course, that it is unlikely that you would always completely agree. But just think how refreshing it could be to share the cleaning of the toilet. Perhaps there are new and different approaches to the job. A fresh scent - something you were unaware of to be gained.
Yes, "Life is difficult." To love or not to love." To hug or not to hug. To be approachable or distant. To see the world through the eyes of another. To learn something from another. To shave or not to shave. That is the question. 
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poeticcougar
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Oct 7 @ 11:17AM
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were you married to my dad's wife? I stayed there for 2 weeks when I first moved here and one day I cleaned the whole bathroom after a bath (I used bath oil so the tub needed it...I kept cleaning). When dad got home he freaked "Don't let her know...say I did it. SHe's fussy that way."  OMG I cleaned the bathroom...shoot me! I'd LOVE if I came home to a clean house and bathroom that "I" didn't have to clean. Or a toilet paper roll that I didn't have to change. sigh.
But an outhouse? nah...not enough PineSol in the world to get me in one of those unless it's outta desparation. Been there, done that, hated it, cried like a girl. 
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SallyF
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Oct 7 @ 11:27AM
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Interesting choice of muses.....good blog!
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matisse731
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Oct 7 @ 12:01PM
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I have a lot of the same feelings. I don't have a mountain but I live in the country. I really liked Crackers, post. I think she really hit the nail on the head. I think I've passed acceptence of my, single state and slid into a state of numbness. Resulting in a state of Hermitisim. 
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missliss78
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Oct 7 @ 8:34PM
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Great blog....
Great flow.....
I'd never, ever complain if someone else cleaned the toilet...or the bathroom..or the kitchen....well, you get my point.
I always enjoy your blogs. Thanks for sharing your thoughts.~*~
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