I am here today to vent...sorry if you dont want to read dont...I came on this site in a ever quest of finding "The Man for Me" and after being asked for my phone number pretty much after the first few connections by mail...and being asked my address right away too...and being called everything from a player..to oh I know why you wont give it out..your really married....well first off for the record I am NOT MARRIED I havent been in a very long time...I am pretty much a born again virgin of MY OWN CHOICE...and I am fine with that...but after the last few days of dealing with some men that dont have a clue about how they feel and asking my advice and after giving it (big mistake) I have been yelled at, told I dont know what Im talking about being ONLY a woman...well maybe thats because..hello.. I AM A WOMAN...I can only think and feel like A WOMAN... All this coming from men that only a few days or weeks ago started off by wanting and needing my honesty for a relationship with them... so I am asking please dont tell me how bad your wife/girlfriend/lover was to you then tell me your giving it another chance just in case it really wasnt over..after I might add you said just how wonderful me and you were going to be together...first off..if she ran around with you on her husband..well that should be a clue...second if this wasnt the first time it happened well that might be another clue..and saying this im sure its the same for men to so many people playing games with each other and all it causes is allot of hurt and pain...I have met such wonderful, loving,special men as well as women on here and have built a bond I am sure forever..My wish and hope for everyone is stop blaming others for stuff you need to work out yourself ...we should lift up each other not cause someone to fall..and now that I have said my say...I am going to put my heart in a safe place until I as a WOMAN can trust again...once trust is broken it takes awhile to get it back im not sure you ever do...all I can do is hope....I am truly sorry if my venting causes pain..but right now that what I am feeling..but I refuse to become a person without truth...
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Blogs by butterfly943:
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| The Question I ask myself is Why--only a Womans view |
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QtrAcreGalSeeking
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Oct 7 @ 2:38PM
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This goes DITTO for me, too.... 
(Thanks, for writing the blog no one wants me to write) 
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butterfly943
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Oct 7 @ 2:41PM
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Your welcome...I find that sometimes people what you to agree with them not really say the truth
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CHARLIgurl1
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Oct 7 @ 2:45PM
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Youre only saying what a lot of other ladies go through too Im sure.
It just shows you havent met HIM yet thats all.
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marylou
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Oct 7 @ 2:48PM
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Oh I have been caught with men like that.....and quite a few times. Very disappointing......but thats how some males are........and females also. It stinks....sux and whatever. We just have to keep moving on.......until we light upon the genuine ones.
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butterfly943
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Oct 7 @ 2:49PM
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I sure hope your right...and I hope I can be me not someone he wants me to be...thank you
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butterfly943
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Oct 7 @ 2:51PM
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You are very right marylou..I believe we all..men as well as women have had someone like this in their lives...thank you
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goatman
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Oct 7 @ 2:58PM
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I know it's tough telling the truth and having to listen to the backlash.
Some people's egos get in the way when you don't say what they want to hear.
Stay strong, don't let the pain dissuade you from being who you are. Whatever you choose, you'll find the right one to complete you.
Be strong.
da goat
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IB4U
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Oct 7 @ 2:59PM
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[B]
For some of those same things you have eluded to in your blog is most likely why they were divorced in the first place...... 
I believe that no matter how inoccent we were or are, it takes two to Tango as it takes two to make a marrage and it takes two to make a divorce....The blame for
most has taken two to make the break... 
He who is completely innocent cast the first stone.... 
Love makes the world go round and I believe Love is the answer to most problems
caring for one another and thinking of the others feelings....
Excuse me I am starting to editorialise.... 
Just My Opinion 
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butterfly943
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Oct 7 @ 3:08PM
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Thank you goatman..I will stay strong..and thank you too IB4U..what you say is very true..it does take 2...and hopefully the person that involves you in their life will be honest with you...as well as themselves...that didnt happen in my case..thanks for reading
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Jacksonboy
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Oct 7 @ 3:26PM
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 It wasn't me. 
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butterfly943
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Oct 7 @ 3:29PM
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Nope it wasnt you...you are right..btw welcome back jackson
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ColdinWisconsin
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Oct 7 @ 4:09PM
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Ahhh yes. The men who are our friends. I think that is what I shall change my profile heading too...I will just be your friend.
Is my frustration showing?
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butterfly943
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Oct 7 @ 4:38PM
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You got it Coldinwisconsin....The ones that want all of you but offer little of themselves its not your frustration showing only your honesty...thank you
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imlost2
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Oct 7 @ 4:39PM
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Right on gf, you have a point there. May I add one more to those? I pick carefully, I believe after talking to a man for awhile who I will meet. He will usually say, he doesn't like games and so forth. Well neither do I. So after taking time, and turning down other offers, spending time talking to him only, sharing thoughts, perhaps even personal ideas, he begins to come up with excuses like a softball game he forgot about why we couldn't meet on Friday like we planned. Hey my kids played softball, and they give you the schedule wayyyyyyy in advance. Or his mother got sick, or numerous excuses. So you never meet after two or three excuses because you realize you've been put on the back burner and find out he does like playing games after all. Now I'm not saying all men are like this, because I have met some nice guys, but, this has happened, and hey guys, if you don't plan on meeting just say so, and don't waste our time. Life is too short. TC Lost
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butterfly943
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Oct 7 @ 4:43PM
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You are so NOT lost..imlost2 you are saying things that are true in both sexes..women as well as men play games with peoples hearts..and it hurts..thank you
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MrPaul
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Oct 7 @ 4:45PM
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 Awesome blog and what needed to be said. There are a lot of players out there on both sides   . It is a shame we have to muck thru the trash to find the good ones,  But when we find the right, honest and honorable one..  ...........watch out.  My heart goes out to you and all the ladies that have been hurt by fools and players  To all the true ladies out there...........Stand tall..............Hold your head high and dont change for anyone. You are special and loved as you are. ..A gift from God God bless, Paul http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6_fux2_-T0Y
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butterfly943
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Oct 7 @ 4:48PM
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Thank you MrPaul...for being you...with all the words of wisdom you've given me...and for believing that I AM SOMEBODY....
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kywonder
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Oct 7 @ 4:50PM
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Well Ms Butterfly.
As a sister to you, I can only tell you one thing. You are too good for people like that. How people can thing nasty things about you is just beyond my scope of imagination. And it takes alot to get the best of my imagination.
You just stay strong and the rest of us who really know you will stand by and hold up your arms and help you through these difficult times.
Love ya Sis
kywonder
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butterfly943
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Oct 7 @ 4:56PM
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Thank you..kywonder..this came from 2 different men I truly want a relationship with..one I even spoke with by phone...It also came from an ex today saying he missed me and wanted me back in FL...I have left that love way behind. and not ONE TIME did they ask how I feel..only themselves...thank you for being a true friend/sister
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KnittinKitten
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Oct 7 @ 5:13PM
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Ranting is always permitted...and, you did it well...like the lady you are. Let me ask you one thing...Perhaps it will make your day....along with the kudo I sent...
Deep down inside aren't you a wee bit happy that you are learning...and that you can more easily recognize....those who are NOT for you. The way we all interact is a wonderful weeding out process and, even at my age, there is sometimes heartbreak. But, also at my age, I know we mend!
However, I try to remember that, if I didn't at least give it a try.....the only alternative I would have would be to climb back up in my ivory tower and stay there.....
SAFE
and
LONELY
You're gonna make it just fine!
Fondly,
KK
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butterfly943
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Oct 7 @ 5:22PM
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Thank you so much kk...And you are also very right..I could sit here wishing I could see them fall and say ha ha I told ya so..but thats NOT ME..and it never will be who I am...I wish them well...I also know that they were really not for me..although it hurts and me being me im sure it will for some time...I guess im not happy with lessons I need to learn...Thank you again
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Cruisenite
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Oct 7 @ 5:37PM
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Always be true to yourself and truthful to others. Yes, there are far too many players in both sexes. All the more reason I just come here to visit with friends. But, never give up that quest for real love Butterfly. Sooner or later the one that is right for you will come along and you'll be happy ever after. You already know what you don't want and won't tolerate. If another comes along like the last, move right on to the next. Hearts heal pretty rapidly thank goodness and I hope yours will very soon
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butterfly943
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Oct 7 @ 5:46PM
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And again let me say thank you...Cruisenite...You have been a true friend..always with your kind words..and you are very true...Im giving my heart a little time to heal..
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Snappygoddess
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Oct 7 @ 7:53PM
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A lot of men can't seem to handle a woman that does and does not know what she wants out of life...I am so glad I have a man that appreciates a woman like that 
I am sorry for your hurt but so glad you aren't willing to settle for just anyone to keep from being alone. Sometimes alone and content is better then together with a miserable partner.
Stick to your guns, gal
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WSOR
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Oct 7 @ 7:57PM
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I know what you're feeling. It's a combo of frustration, anger, & just wanting shout "doesn't anybody have consideration??" My prayers are with you daily, & as the others have mentioned prior to me.. you've got friends in here that DO care... genuine friends.. & we'll be there for ya however we can.
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butterfly943
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Oct 7 @ 8:04PM
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Your very right I WILL NOT settle for anyone that not willing to give what he wants from me...Honesty..been there..done that..it doesnt work..Thank you so much and im happy you have a good guy..
Yes WSOR you are an understanding friend of mine...and I know that your there for me thank you for that
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hpylady
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Oct 7 @ 8:49PM
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I'm sorry you had to go through that .. I know the right things to tell you .. basically don't give up .. there are good guys out there .. I also know the burn still hurts .. so take your time and keep your radar on for all of those slugs out there
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butterfly943
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Oct 7 @ 8:59PM
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Thank you hpylady...I will be fine
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