| Jan 7, 2006 @ 1:13 PM |
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louise72654
Posts: 25
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Hi there every one, i was just wondering if any one has met some one from a dating site and not seen a pic of them before meeting,And what the experience was like?
Why is there no pic posted? I know they give many reason's. I had a date once not knowing what he looked like and no one showed up...did he come see me and think i was not for him? He said he just didnt make it...but we didnt talk after that...
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| Jan 7, 2006 @ 9:14 PM |
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airbrushbabe
Posts: 43
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I always feel like those are married folks not wanting their spouse to find out.
~Airbrush Babe
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| Jan 7, 2006 @ 9:49 PM |
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LSU79
Posts: 323
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I have several times in the earlier days of online dating before the advent of cheap scanners and digital cameras.
Alot of women are still afraid to post a pic due to safety concerns, but at least now can send you one after you start writing. I don't think a guy can get away with that.
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| Jan 7, 2006 @ 10:11 PM |
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airbrushbabe
Posts: 43
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Alot of women are still afraid to post a pic due to safety concerns, but at least now can send you one after you start writing. I don't think a guy can get away with that.
I think you're right LSU, on both accounts. I want to see who I am posting to or who sent me an email. I feel uncomfortable when hearing from someone with no pic. It may not be but it seems deceitful to begin with when it's a guy. I probalby shouldn't but I assume they are married or in a relationship and don't want to show their face. 
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| Jan 8, 2006 @ 10:41 AM |
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volleyballwilly
Posts: 1
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I have no pic as i'm very married. I'm on these type sites as I'm always looking for those 18-31 who I think will fit in with the ones we get at our free volleyball cookouts we have each summer.
We do this to provide a place where that age group can have fun and meet others away from the bar scene.
We are private so I am a little picky.
Basicly I look for singles who are drug free, don't use tobacco, can have fun without getting plastered, have respect for private property, and like playing or watching volleyball.
Most of the ones we have been getting in past years either go or have gone to nearby WVU in Morgantown WV.
We are looking forward to meeting new people again this year.
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| Jan 8, 2006 @ 11:24 AM |
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Heaveninawildflower
Posts: 14,775
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I've dated two that had no pictures, one said he was technically challenged (he has one posted now, on another site) and the other said he preferred privacy because he meets so many people in his line of work. They were both good looking men, and while we only dated a couple of times, I never had the feeling that they were being anything less than honest.
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| Jan 8, 2006 @ 12:07 PM |
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Greystone1
Posts: 1,677
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I generally don't even read a profile that doesn't have a picture. And I assume the picture is more flattering than accurate.
Men are visually stimulated. Saying they should not be is like saying dogs should not be dogs or cats should not be cats. They just are, and we just are.
That said, most of us are not (as many would have it) looking for a barbie doll. Put an accurate pic out there. Someone somewhere will be drawn to it. Just keep in mind that when you meet if he does not immediately recognize you he will feel that he has been deceived... and indeed he has.
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| Jan 8, 2006 @ 12:46 PM |
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cocoa55
Posts: 11
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Have you ever felt like you have been decieved by someone not having thier accurate picture of themself on here.
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| Jan 8, 2006 @ 2:22 PM |
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louise72654
Posts: 25
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Well i have not been decieved and i try not to decieve any one. My pic here on this profile was taken last summer so i do need a new one.But i have found when i am chatting to some one and i like them than i ask them if they want to see me on my cam so they know excately what i look like...And it worries me when i ask them if they have a cam and they come up with some reason why they dont have a cam.I try not to hide anything...
What do you all think about seeing someone on cam? Does that show the real person?
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| Jan 8, 2006 @ 5:24 PM |
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Heaveninawildflower
Posts: 14,775
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did he send you his picture in personal email
Tsisqua - it was a 'blind date'. He was local, and worked within walking distance of where I work, so we met for dinner nearby. I actually recognized him immediately just from his description of himself. We went out a couple of times and had some laughs, but never 'made contact' as it were.
I think I'm visual, but a picture is static and I'm more interested in kinetics...the way he moves, and the kind of idiosyncratic things like the raised eyebrow when something questionable is said...those are more the things that resonate with me and it's probably why I'm not as concerned about a picture as some others might be. It would probably be kind of hit or miss as to whether I'd be recognizable from my pictures; I've been accused of being a chameleon as I tend to change depending on where I am, who I'm with and what I'm doing.
[Edited on 1/8/2006 5:27 PM]
[Edited on 1/8/2006 5:33 PM]
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| Jan 8, 2006 @ 5:25 PM |
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louise72654
Posts: 25
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lol Tsisqua i think we have all been flashed by some one on here with a cam...or even when they send you a pic some times....You cant hit close fast enough.....
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| Jan 12, 2006 @ 11:11 AM |
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hopeful_lady
Posts: 137
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The photo on here is the geniune me taken Thanksgiving 2005 with my visiting grandsons from Florida. Why is it everyone believes a photo they see of the people is really them? You know people could use an old photo or say things to get somebody but its not really how they are now. I don't focus on photos that much, I focus on how the person relates to topics or interests about themselves, and if they ignore that I have a lot of doubts. My search is for a lasting person not some drifter.
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| Jan 12, 2006 @ 11:35 AM |
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beachnutRU
Posts: 3,228
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Heaven you probably thought I was Sean Connery......no problem lots of people do......they have me say BOND,.....JAMES BOND..........I am in agreeance. If I dare to put my picture out there then the person I am going to meet is going to have to put something out there too.
Its only fair.
Maybe Don Knotts rather than Sean Connery.......who knows. It is me however. 
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| Jan 12, 2006 @ 12:26 PM |
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lecriveuse
Posts: 1,865
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don knotts?  
my friend is working on her PhD and staying with her grandfather. she put her pix online, and some loser on this site downloaded and started looking for her! fortunately, she's pretty much the hermit, and her grandfather's place is pretty hidden.
definitely a good reason not for posting a pix, but hers is still on there. she's a 5th degree black belt aikido. i wanna watch; i wanna watch. 
[Edited on 1/12/2006 12:29 PM]
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| Jan 12, 2006 @ 8:02 PM |
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Doug_blueeyes
Posts: 46
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The reason I posted my pic was because I thought it might be useful to some people. Those with a garden this summer can enlarge it and hang it out there to scare off the crows. 
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| Jan 12, 2006 @ 8:35 PM |
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Star22
Posts: 95
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Tsisqua I've had the same thing happen to me...so I don't really like using a cam either.
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| Jan 13, 2006 @ 6:56 PM |
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LouA
Posts: 38
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If someone does not have a pic, and they email me I do not respond unless they offer to send one to my email. It's only fair that if you post a pic, they should at least let you see who you are speaking with....
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| Jan 15, 2006 @ 1:47 AM |
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dragonsfly
Posts: 2
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"Have you ever felt like you have been decieved by someone not having thier accurate picture of themself on here."
Oh yeah!! - I wouldn't have recognized the person if they hadn't told me what they would be wearing! Picture at LEAST 10 yeaes old. Why, oh why do people do that?
Yes - I have no picture up yet. I joined exactly 10 minutes ago. It'll be there soon. It'll be current. And it'll be me!
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| Jan 16, 2006 @ 1:02 AM |
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Caveman6c
Posts: 1
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Why is it 'deceitful' to not post a photo... especially when 'it's a guy?'
I had photos posted, but tired of all the insincere and unsolicited comments, especially from ladies overseas.
I've answered personals by newspaper and telephone voicemails, and have met with many ladies before 'seeing' them. Of course, we talked by phone or had other correspondence, and always told how to recognize each other.
I think it's unfortunate that anyone believes that 'guys' who post personal ads without photos are trying to hide something, but the ladies without photos are only trying to be safe.
A little discretion is always warranted with any new relationship, but unwarranted suspicion can only get in the way.
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| Jan 16, 2006 @ 1:41 AM |
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Angel54214
Posts: 13,220
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Safety should always be the top priority when meeting a stranger. Women that say what you mentioned go by their own personal experiences. I have had that experience myself in the past. Its very scary! I could have been raped. I now will not meet a stranger whether I see a photo or not alone. For the first meet I will bring a relative or friend for the first meet as well as carrying pepper spray and a digital phone and I have had nice meets as well. If the interested partner protests this, I will not meet. If he admires my caring for my safety, then it will be this way.
Men that meet women with out seeing a photo are also taking a risk. No one thinks of safety until a bad experience happens. There are decietful women as well as men out there. Its always good healthy practice to put safety first. Nothing comes out negative in this manner.
Its all by individual experiences on your post. Hope I helped answer your questions and sure many of both genders will state their opinions and points of view as well. Best of luck on your search....Angel
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