| Dec 27, 2006 @ 2:51 AM |
How Far is too Far ??
|
|
Dovestreasure
Posts: 3,419
|
The world of internet dating of course introduces you to potential mates from far and near. How far would you travel to be with someone you cared about?
I traveled back and forth to Oregon for a year once upon a time. It was of course very tough to maintain that relationship. I have traveled from orlando twice a month to the florida panhandle for nearly two years to be with friends that were like family to me.
Now onto the present.. I was seeing a man that lives 90 miles away and we have stopped seeing each other. He says the distance is an issue for him. He is not a member on MD but I know he comes into these threads to see what I am saying. Would 90 miles become too difficult for you after making the trip five times since early November?
|
|
  |
|
| Dec 27, 2006 @ 4:42 AM |
How Far is too Far ?? |
|
witchietoo
Posts: 2,630
|
Well Dove you know my feelings on that....I have dated guys from SC, CA, TX and NJ...all while living in FL....the distance wasn't the issue.....90 % of the time it was because they had their heads up their butts and by the time they wanted a real relationship I had moved on.
|
| |
|
| Dec 27, 2006 @ 5:10 AM |
How Far is too Far ??
|
|
jackf1950
Posts: 688
|
ok, I am lazy, and like my ladies close enough to get together more than once every few weeks or what ever. so, 90 miles, yep to far for me...
I am more like 25..........
|
|
| |
|
| Dec 27, 2006 @ 5:22 AM |
How Far is too Far ?? |
|
minky
Posts: 261
|
I have been in this position several times. I would be glad to drive 2-3 hrs on weekends to visit someone I really cared about.
But middle aged men want covenient romance, meaning not much effort on their part.
I think if there is a potential for love men would travel any distance.
I he doesn't want to come to you he's not looking for love, with anyone or , just not with you IMHO.
|
| |
|
| Dec 27, 2006 @ 7:30 AM |
How Far is too Far ??
|
|
wolfskil
Posts: 49
|
I don't find that distance is an issue, If you really care about someone 90 miles isn't much to travel. I hope y'all have a great day!!! 
|
|
| |
|
| Dec 27, 2006 @ 11:00 AM |
How Far is too Far ?? |
|
witchietoo
Posts: 2,630
|
  wolfskil
Well my friend I knew you would chime in on that one, your as bad as I am. Like me you would go to the ends of the earth and back for someone you loved.
|
| |
|
| Dec 27, 2006 @ 11:04 AM |
How Far is too Far ??
|
|
witchietoo
Posts: 2,630
|
ok, I am lazy, and like my ladies close enough to get together more than once every few weeks or what ever. so, 90 miles, yep to far for me...
Well you did prove that Jack, you wouldn't come to the party to meet us....Someday the three of us lady's, will get to meet our favorite pervert...lol
But middle aged men want covenient romance, meaning not much effort on their part.
Not all the time. The one from SC I was with, drove down to Jacksonville or St Augustine every weekend he was off. There were times he came down for just one night to hang out. He is 49 so it wasn't like he was a kid. I don't know the ones I attract seem to want to come here to meet me first. In their minds I am on my home turf so I would be a lot more comfortable. Now I did fly out to CA almost a year and a half ago to meet someone. I had no issue with that, he paid for me to come out there.
|
|
| |
|
| Dec 27, 2006 @ 12:51 PM |
How Far is too Far ?? |
|
Dovestreasure
Posts: 3,419
|
Someone told me he must not be really into me, or making the drive would not be an issue for him. One thing I have discovered since moving to Florida nearly thirty years ago is.. That Floridians tend to want to live, work, and love as close to home as possible. In New York people had longer daily commutes to get to their jobs then he had to come here. I was more then willing to do my part of the commuting by the way.However his living situation made it impossible for me to visit him where he lives.
Long distant relationships are not ideal.. but if I truely cared about this person, it would be worth the travel time no matter what. You close too many doors and make the world a whole lot smaller if you let distance stand in the way.
|
| |
|
| Dec 27, 2006 @ 1:03 PM |
How Far is too Far ??
|
|
gussy
Posts: 36
|
i personally would travel the united states if i knew that there was that slight chance of having a long term relationship ( Marriage )
no hill is to high to climb and no moutain is too steep ............... just depends on how much ur wanting someone or something ............ to what u r willing to do ............. 
|
|
| |
|
| Dec 27, 2006 @ 4:27 PM |
How Far is too Far ?? |
|
fuchia04
Posts: 953
|
I used to be a believer in LD relationships. They don't make any sense to me now. For one thing, if I am committing myself to someone, I would like to be able to see to see the person sometime. Otherwise, I might as well be dating my computer monitor. At least I get to see it everyday. 
I don't know about you guys and gals but hopping on an airplane just to go on a date seems a bit like overkill. An airplane.. stupid security checks.. and sitting between two fat, smelly guys in a cramped cabin for four hours... just to go see a movie with someone in Albuquerque. Overkill? Yes!
Also, I don't own a car of my own, so I've had to rent a car whenever I wanted to go see someone I was involved with, who lived about 120 miles away. It's quite a hassle to rent a car, you can't just get up and go. You have to spend hours searching for available cars, then make the reservation, and then fill out a bunch of paper work. Sometimes there's no cars available on the day you're planning on meeting someone. That happened to me.  For me, that was the last straw. I won't get involved with anyone, unless they live within an hour's drive.
- the Fuchian
|
| |
|
| Dec 27, 2006 @ 10:01 PM |
How Far is too Far ??
|
|
Dovestreasure
Posts: 3,419
|
The man in question has two cars and a motorcycle and ninety miles away is not unrealistic.. he did however say that if he wanted to come over to just hang out on a week day it would be difficult considering he gets up at 4:00 am for work. I guess what bothers me most is he knew the day he messaged me, where I lived. He knew how far he needed to drive after he came to meet me for the first time. Yet he kept on coming back week after week... then suddenly the distance became an issue. Why start communicating with someone who does not live close to you if distance is a concern from the get go.
Fuchia I do have to agree that flying across the country to keep a relationship going was very tough. The cost alone made it really rough. The distance also gave him opportunities to not be faithful as well . My LDR ended up being a real scoundrel ( and im being polite) he scammed me out of money and pretended to be dying of a terminal disease. I now stay within the state of Florida in my quest for love .
|
|
| |
|
| Dec 28, 2006 @ 2:23 PM |
How Far is too Far ?? |
|
fuchia04
Posts: 953
|
Quote:
The distance also gave him opportunities to not be faithful as well .
Reply:
That's another serious issue I have with LDR's. You have no idea how serious the person is on the other side of the screen. They could have you believing they are serious, while they could just as well be playing with you, or for that matter playing you and a bunch of others behind your back.  You have no idea what they're doing and you have no way to find out. It's hard to take cross-country dating serious. In fact, I'll be blunt and say I think it's a joke. (Just my opinion of course  )
Dove, you seem like such a nice person. I think it is such a disgrace how someone could want to abuse your kindness and compassion in such a horrible way.  
[Edited on 12/28/2006 2:31 PM]
|
| |
|
| Dec 28, 2006 @ 10:59 PM |
How Far is too Far ??
|
|
Dovestreasure
Posts: 3,419
|
Thank you Fuchia.. he found as easy mark.. I trust too easily, or at least I did back in 2000. His oldest daughter moved out his home after she found out what he had done. She has very little to do with him today. There are many unkind people on this earth , and somehow I manage to stumble across them.
I just got a message from a man that lives in NY. Its his first message to me.
I'm a self seeking, highly motivated man with alot of love, with a
good sense of humor, and a great personality from bronx a city in new york..My hobbies are swimming,travelling and dinning out.i am divorce man living with a kid called Michael,who is 11yrs of age.i have been divorce for 8yrs and i need a wife.I know I will be a good husband, passionate lover and faithful husband for the right woman .I had no doubt you were the woman God made especially for me.I long for the day that we can meet face to face. If we can stay together until we can be together, then there will be no one who will ever be able to separate us.I have been hurt so many times in the past that it takes a lot for me to trust someone. The first time I saw you, I had this gut feeling that you and I were going to be together, and for a very long time.Love is a very powerful word. When you tell someone that you love them you have to truly mean it from the bottom of your heart. I have this feeling that i really, truly mean it from the bottom of my heart.
.No war or distance can ever keep me from my destiny.. It will continue to stretch across any ocean and over every grain of sand between us to get to you.. I hope I'm not over burdening you with all these love things but I do love you and you have me forever if you want me. Thank you so much .
This has run like hell written all over it!!!!!!!!
|
|
| |
|
| Dec 28, 2006 @ 11:11 PM |
How Far is too Far ?? |
|
witchietoo
Posts: 2,630
|
Can we say Scammer in Nigeria? lol
|
| |
|
| Dec 28, 2006 @ 11:32 PM |
How Far is too Far ??
|
|
Dovestreasure
Posts: 3,419
|
This may be far more then that I am going to start a thread about a scam that happenned to a friend of mine this past week. there was a lady on Dr Phil that had something similar that happenned to her. Its pretty bad stuff.
This message immediately made me very weary.
|
|
| |
|
| Dec 29, 2006 @ 12:57 AM |
How Far is too Far ?? |
|
Baafy
Posts: 6
|
Heh. I've been in two long distanace relationships. The first, I spend 3 1/2 years with the guy. He moved here after only knowing me for 2-3 months. He cheated on me with my best friend and then shortly after attempted suicide. No need to feel sorry for me. I'm over it.
The second was most recent. I actually met him on here. We met while I was on vacation in Tampa. He lived in Orlando. I live in Tallahassee. It's a 3 1/2 hour ride. Yeah, it kinda sucks. But, if you're not around someone 24-7 it can definately make an impact. You truely never know what level they're on until you can see them at will. Needless-to-say, me and that guy are no longer together. But, I'll keep on trying. I have faith I will find someone one day that will treat me the way I deserve to be treated.
|
| |
|
| Dec 29, 2006 @ 2:51 AM |
How Far is too Far ??
|
|
Dovestreasure
Posts: 3,419
|
I have a friend that lives in Tallahassee and is dating a man that lives in Orlando. The distance is pretty tough , but so far they have managed to make it work for them .. and sometimes the distance makes the heart grow fonder. 
Closer to home is the ideal though.. I have had less luck in my own back yard it seems.
|
|
| |
|
| Dec 29, 2006 @ 8:25 AM |
How Far is too Far ?? |
|
witchietoo
Posts: 2,630
|
I have had less luck in my own back yard it seems
Same here Dove. I have no clue why either, it really is frustrating at times. I don't know if it is because I live so close to the water that the guys in this area expect all the women to be barbies or what.
|
| |
|
| Dec 29, 2006 @ 11:01 AM |
How Far is too Far ??
|
|
Dovestreasure
Posts: 3,419
|
The men that contact me from Orlando are either considerably younger, or are just looking for an intimate encounter. Men that I meet in bars are not the men that are relationship material. Mister 90 miles away keeps telling me to find someone local to date. Mister 90 miles away was on his way here in the wee hours of the morning and never showed. I was sick with worry and thought something had happenned to him. He decided to not come since he was not feeling well. He never thought to call. I am in very low spirits today.
|
|
| |
|
| Dec 29, 2006 @ 11:59 AM |
How Far is too Far ?? |
|
witchietoo
Posts: 2,630
|
I've only met one so far that bothers to let me know when plans change. That's Mr. NE. He is suppose to be going out to Sacramento for New Years and is driving there from NE. Well the weather is really bad in WY right now and he knew I would be worried. He called at 1am letting me know he didn't leave at midnight and will be leaving sometime today, maybe. Promised he would call and let me when he stopped for the day and when he got there. Why can't more men be more considerate like that? He knows that I am a worry wart at times and thinks it is cute...lol
As for men around here, well they mostly just want sex. If that is all I wanted I don't need a dating site for that. All I have to do is pick up the phone as I know plenty of guys that would love a no strings relationship.
|
| |
|
|
|
|