| Sep 16, 2006 @ 11:47 AM |
What's The Big Secret Of Catching Him And Keeping Him??
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wawasweetie
Posts: 242
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I would like to know how alot of women seem to get the man of their dreams and hold on to him.What really keeps a man coming back if it's not the sex or the looks? It frustrates me on how many unattractive, no personality women I see with someone, and I'm all alone. I shouldn't be envious, but what do they have that I don't. I've spoiled every guy I dated, treated them like kings-they never had a reason to complain.Now,I can only attract men that just want to hang out once in awhile and not want me for girlfriend material.What am I doing wrong?Am I too nice? Should i be a pushy little bitch? What is the big secret to catching him and keeping him? The guy I like now just wants casual,he doesn't want me to be pushy.His last girlfriend controlled him.What should I do to make him want to see more of me???
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| Sep 16, 2006 @ 11:59 AM |
What's The Big Secret Of Catching Him And Keeping Him?? |
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ravensday
Posts: 388
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How about some self confidence....Men are attracted to women who like themselves and who are self assured. And I am getting the feeling that you really dont like who you are. And men love the chase. Let a guy do the chasing. It works. I personally dont chase men. I dont have the energy or patience. I learned a long time ago the more you chased a man the more he ran. 
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| Sep 16, 2006 @ 12:01 PM |
What's The Big Secret Of Catching Him And Keeping Him??
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Loreli
Posts: 25,398
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The guy I like now just wants casual
he's told you....move on.
doesn't take rocket science.
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| Sep 16, 2006 @ 12:08 PM |
What's The Big Secret Of Catching Him And Keeping Him?? |
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wawasweetie
Posts: 242
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I've already moved on! I have a date with someone else next Friday to go see a concert! I'm just asking this question out of curiousity.There is no need for bashing!!
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| Sep 16, 2006 @ 12:14 PM |
What's The Big Secret Of Catching Him And Keeping Him??
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Heaveninawildflower
Posts: 18,605
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What should I do to make him want to see more of me???
Think less about him. Don't do the juvenile 'what do you care' thing when he asks how you are. Stop obsessing and find something to do in the real world rather than the fantasy one you're obviously living in. Make a life for yourself and for the son you've barely mentioned. Then when he, or anyone else, asks how you are, tell them you're doing just fine because it will be the truth. Anything after that's the icing on the cake. And once you've really done those things, the self-confidence and joy of living that are really the sexiest attributes on earth, will be there. Until you've found some contentment within yourself though, it will be only a facade and nobody will be convinced.
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| Sep 16, 2006 @ 12:20 PM |
What's The Big Secret Of Catching Him And Keeping Him?? |
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Willie_Garvin
Posts: 44
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The secret is to lower your expectations.
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| Sep 16, 2006 @ 12:25 PM |
What's The Big Secret Of Catching Him And Keeping Him??
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wawasweetie
Posts: 242
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Hey Heaven,my son is 20 yr.old and lives elsewhere.He has his own life now.Please don't insinuate that all I care about is findig a man.But after being alonefor 3 yrs.,it sure would be niceto have one.Don't I deserve happiness???
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| Sep 16, 2006 @ 12:48 PM |
What's The Big Secret Of Catching Him And Keeping Him?? |
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robodad
Posts: 7,823
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Don't I deserve happiness??? We all do, girl.
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| Sep 16, 2006 @ 12:57 PM |
What's The Big Secret Of Catching Him And Keeping Him??
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Heaveninawildflower
Posts: 18,605
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Please don't insinuate that all I care about is findig a man.
The trouble is that's all we've ever seen from you. It could be that's all the men in your life have seen from you as well. What do you do for fun, entirely apart from the everlasting (and ever fun) exchanges between the sexes? Is there something that interests you, aside from finding a man....philosophy, gardening, languages, theatre, traveling, boating, archaeology...damn, I'm going thru my own list here. I won't live long enough to learn and try everything I want to, man in my life or not. The thing is, it seems that your quest for a relationship is what is defining you right now, and that's not a good thing, either in finding that relationship or in living your life. You end up spending so much time thinking about what's missing that you miss out on what's available to you. We all deserve happiness, but it's not something anyone can give us...we have to do it ourselves first.
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| Sep 16, 2006 @ 1:00 PM |
What's The Big Secret Of Catching Him And Keeping Him?? |
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kattsmeow
Posts: 22,625
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As far as "catching him"? Ya gotta have the right bait.  
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| Sep 16, 2006 @ 1:02 PM |
What's The Big Secret Of Catching Him And Keeping Him??
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Willie_Garvin
Posts: 44
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Oh don't go there...that won't be pretty!
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| Sep 16, 2006 @ 1:07 PM |
What's The Big Secret Of Catching Him And Keeping Him?? |
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Heaveninawildflower
Posts: 18,605
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Oh don't go there...that won't be pretty!
Aw, she's just rubbing it in. Katt has bait that others can only dream of...gorgeous, sexy, intelligent, a professional chef AND a genuinely warm, caring individual....Haban never stood a chance...poor guy (giggling to self here).
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| Sep 16, 2006 @ 1:19 PM |
What's The Big Secret Of Catching Him And Keeping Him??
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Willie_Garvin
Posts: 44
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Aw, she's just rubbing it in Yeah, that's the problem. Don't want any katt fights erupting...
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| Sep 16, 2006 @ 2:51 PM |
What's The Big Secret Of Catching Him And Keeping Him?? |
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definitelydi
Posts: 12,602
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Hey Wawa! Ever see the movie "Misery?" I think you might be able to keep a guy that way. Worth a shot?! 
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| Sep 16, 2006 @ 2:52 PM |
What's The Big Secret Of Catching Him And Keeping Him??
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wawasweetie
Posts: 242
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Oh,so obviously having a hot body is the answer!What about personality and how you treat the man?? I see alot of men out there with women with hot bodies,no personality and treat them like shit,but the men still love them and do everything for them and stick by them. It's not fair. And to answer your question heaven, I'm not obsessed with finding a relationship or man. I'm just tired of being alone and watching everybody else have someone. I keep hearing from people that I'm such a good person and a pleasure to be around. I have customers that come to my store when they can go to a store closer to their home just because I make their day brighter. I wish I had as much attention outside of work as I do at work. My co-workers may not like me,but the Customers love me. So,what does that tell you about my personality. If there is nothing wrong with my personality,than it must be my looks. And almost all the interests I have involve having a partner to do them with. So,I guess I'm wanting too much out of life and should just give up and crawl in a hole. No wonder I have such a negative attitude-because NOONE appreciates me for who I am. My self confidence and self-esteem have been destroyed by other people. That is why I feel the way that I do. My closest friends and family tell me that there is nothing wrong with me and to not change who I am. I just wish I had more friends wanting to be around me and a man that wants to spend more time with me. Is it fair to tell someone that you love being with them and don't want to leave when you are together and than not go out of your way to spend more time with that person? That just doesn't make sense and it hurts a person's feelings-like mine. Maybe I should just become a nun or a hermit and stay away from people altogether.
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| Sep 16, 2006 @ 2:58 PM |
What's The Big Secret Of Catching Him And Keeping Him?? |
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ravensday
Posts: 388
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Or maybe you should continue to feel sorry for yourself. 
Men like a challenge. Period. Give them that and they are hooked like a fish. Look I have guys who range in ages from 20-43 chasing me. Do I care? Not one bit. I ignore the ones I like and talk the ears off the ones I dont. The ones I ignore want to know why I dont pay more attention to them, and why I am not falling all over them. So they spend more time getting to know me. They are the ones I want. The ones who really know me. The others turn out to be really great friends who I can turn to when I am down or for advice.
Men are very simple creatures. I just treat them all like little kids. Give them a nice toy to play with (me) and tell them how brave and cute they are and they pretend that they are in charge....... 
*I have been told that if they were to put me in a cell with Osama Bin Laden he would confess just to shut me up.
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| Sep 16, 2006 @ 2:59 PM |
What's The Big Secret Of Catching Him And Keeping Him??
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TiNkErGrRrRrR
Posts: 13,813
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By not smothering him...giving him space when he needs it..having enough confidence in him and yourself to trust him.. 
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| Sep 16, 2006 @ 3:05 PM |
What's The Big Secret Of Catching Him And Keeping Him?? |
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wawasweetie
Posts: 242
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I'm doing all that and more,but if he can come see me at work,why doesn't he make an effort to see me outside of work?? It doesn't make sense.He's single but he just got out of a relationship.He's really toying with my emotions.
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| Sep 16, 2006 @ 3:17 PM |
What's The Big Secret Of Catching Him And Keeping Him??
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robodad
Posts: 7,823
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Stop spoiling them and see what happens.
After that concert, say thank you and go home (alone). If he wants "some", say no.
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| Sep 16, 2006 @ 3:19 PM |
What's The Big Secret Of Catching Him And Keeping Him?? |
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ravensday
Posts: 388
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I give up.
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