| Mar 2, 2007 @ 5:31 AM |
Daddy's girl
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Dukums
Posts: 1,028
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Ok I just have to put the counter question on here to 1stsignofspring's post.
Ladies, what things did your father teach you about how to treat a man? How to relate to him and how to communicate with him?
Would you marry someone like your father?
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| Mar 2, 2007 @ 5:41 AM |
Daddy's girl |
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ISSUESWOPTIONS
Posts: 7,645
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*sits behind the dim lights of the far back lounge, sipping on Hennessey and Coke, listening to Barry White softly belt out notes, and awaiting the answers from the ladies of the fourm...one SHALL be mine....  *
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| Mar 2, 2007 @ 5:46 AM |
Daddy's girl
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luvmycats
Posts: 9,744
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My father, who I refer to as my sperm donor. (that should tell you something) Taught me what NOT to put up with from any man. He also taught me how not to communicate.
Therefore, I do everything just the opposite as he "taught".
I would never even go out with a man like him, much less marry one.
He is a drunk that doesn't know how to communicate without using his fists.
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| Mar 2, 2007 @ 5:59 AM |
Daddy's girl |
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ShadowBandit
Posts: 1,504
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The only thing he "taught" me was what not to put up with from a guy and how a guy should never act. All of which was unintentional so I refuse to give him credit for me actually having a brain and figuring things out on my own.  I won't date guys like him nevermind marry one.
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| Mar 2, 2007 @ 6:08 AM |
Daddy's girl
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Dukums
Posts: 1,028
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Gee did I unwittingly stir up a hornet's nest?
Is there a correlation between a woman having a dead beat father and her ability to understand how to treat a man? Not that either of the respondents do not know. I have no clue if they do or not. But could there be a correlation between having a healthy relationship with a father, and having a healthy relationship with a husband?
Ok back to watching the responses.
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| Mar 2, 2007 @ 6:18 AM |
Daddy's girl |
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lell
Posts: 1,442
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I feel sorry for you luvs and you too shadow  my dads one of the most brilliant men alive, I can and always have been able to go to him with any problem whatsoever and I will always get his honest point of view, doesnt matter if I will like it or not, but Ive learnt from experience to respect it. Hes never raised his hand or even his voice to any of us, hes never needed to just a raising of an eyebrow was always enough to tell us he disapproved.
What he taught me, to treat my man like I would expect to be treated no more no less! and communication in a relationship is vital if you want it to last.
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| Mar 2, 2007 @ 6:32 AM |
Daddy's girl
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loisday
Posts: 1,333
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My Daddy was my best friend. I would marry a man like him in a second!!! He taught me the love of the written word. How to be tolerent of others. How to love. He taught me about tools and how an engine works. He taught me to always put the seat back when you get out of a man's car......................I miss him every day.
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| Mar 2, 2007 @ 7:31 AM |
Daddy's girl |
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luvmycats
Posts: 9,744
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Is there a correlation between a woman having a dead beat father and her ability to understand how to treat a man?
Duke, I think it can work both ways. I chose to break the cycle, as some do. Some women who grew up like I did, end up with bad relationship after another.
I do pride myself on being able to communicate with a man, on many different levels. Not so proud of the fact, that I am a bit domineering. I think that comes from the fact, that I refuse to be used as a doormat. That trait doesn't rear its ugly head, unless I am not being treated fairly.
I treat a man how I want to be treated, with respect, affection, consideration, fairness, as a help mate, honestly, and I love to spoil him. If there is something that I do, that doesn't please him, I would hope he would be honest and tell me about it.
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| Mar 2, 2007 @ 7:34 AM |
Daddy's girl
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1stsignofspring
Posts: 16,199
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My adopted father loved me enough to adopt me....so he is ok in my book.
He always helped me with my school work, but was a very strict disciplinarian..
We never were really close and he wasn't affectionate at all...but I am the total opposite..I am very, very affectionate...go figure? I learned more from watching other men doing it right..by example than from my father. I think I have a healthy outlook on how to treat a man...I learned by trial and error... 
Would I marry someone like my father? Probably not....I like an affectionate man.
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| Mar 2, 2007 @ 8:32 AM |
Daddy's girl |
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ShadowBandit
Posts: 1,504
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Is there a correlation between a woman having a dead beat father and her ability to understand how to treat a man?
I don't really think there is. Anyone can teach you how to treat someone else. For me it was the rest of my family. They taught me that I should treat people how i'd want to be treated. When it comes to relationships I apply that to them as well. My relationship with my father has always been fairly bad but i've never treated him any different than how'd i'd want to be treated. Given the history there I think that's pretty good.. As for my relationships i've probably had more good ones than my friends who are close with their fathers. Then again i've also had the worst relationship of the bunch too. In the end I think it comes down to personal choice...While you get taught this or that along the way it's up to you what you do with that information and how you use it. 
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| Mar 2, 2007 @ 8:39 AM |
Daddy's girl
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Loreli
Posts: 20,318
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My father was strict also, but he taught me alot about life, work ethics, how to change the oil in my car (that was before they computerized everything). He wanted my Mom to stay home with kids, so he worked 2 jobs. He enforced respect for our mother very rigidly. Taught us how to play pinochle, ride bikes and made sure we had a family vacation each year.
He pretty much let us make our own mistakes in love, but the one thing I remember him saying is, it's as easy to love a rich man as a poor one-and vice versa.
Would I marry a man like him? I wouldn't rule it out. But I lean more toward men who believe in mutual roles for partners, not those exlusive by gender.I love my father very much!
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| Mar 2, 2007 @ 8:49 AM |
Daddy's girl |
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blueyes101
Posts: 8,307
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Good job ladies...........And just in case you don't hear it enough.........I'm proud of all of you, and your father should be too. 
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| Mar 2, 2007 @ 8:53 AM |
Daddy's girl
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ISSUESWOPTIONS
Posts: 7,645
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*makes note of all answers. put's star next to [CLASSIFIED]*
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| Mar 2, 2007 @ 8:54 AM |
Daddy's girl |
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Heaveninawildflower
Posts: 15,343
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My father was my role model...would I marry a man like him? In a heartbeat!
He was one of the most loyal, loving and honorable men I've ever known and I've always been hugely grateful that he was my dad. He was the one that took bro and me to church while mom slept in, because he'd promised to do it when he married mom (he was a Lutheran, she was a Catholic, so he had to promise that we'd be raised Catholic). He wasn't as fluent in expressing himself as MLK Jr. was, but long before Martin said it, my dad had, to me...anyone who chooses his friends based on their color is a fool. Patriotism? He was born and raised in Germany and came here as an adult - he wouldn't let German be spoken in the house because he wanted bro and me to be as fluent in English as possible, and because he was an American, dammit! I remember that my first grade teacher researched my family name and found that we were descended from nobility...she actually came to the house to talk to my father about it. His comment was that he'd rather be a truck driver here in the U.S. than royalty anywhere else in the world (and he told me to ignore her - who your ancestors were is meaningless compared to who you become). OK, I'll quit now...I could probably write a book about him, and how very lucky I was to have him as my father.
As to how to treat a man...actually that would have been my mother. And fortunately I decided not to choose her as a role model - a neurotic alcoholic is not someone who treats anyone well, her husband or her children. Unfortunately I married someone who was much more like my mother than my father.
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| Mar 2, 2007 @ 8:56 AM |
Daddy's girl
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Red69Sun
Posts: 1,100
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Absolutely! 
My Dad Rocks and is a really good, responsible, loving guy, that has shown us all his dedication and devotion to his family and loved ones all along. He is strong, firm, and loving......and a wonderful person.
I am proud to call him Dad!  and if I was able to find myself a man similar to him......I would consider myself one lucky gal! He is a tough act to follow........but he did show me........that it is available and possible.........you just have to find the right man! 
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| Mar 2, 2007 @ 10:02 AM |
Daddy's girl |
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candylily
Posts: 1,347
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I loved my dad very much. March 21 will be the 2-year anniversary of his death. 
He was sweet and funny and was very proud of his family and made sure everyone knew it. He was also a little bit of a mischevous bad boy and forgot to get old. From the time I was a little kid and first saw him on tv, Paul Newman always reminded me of my dad both in his looks and personality. As far as I was concerned both then and now, I might as well have been watching my dad on tv. Joanne Woodward reminds me of my mother. (I know that's a little weird but it's true) Not so much in her looks although they do have the same type of look, but definitely in her personality. Who wouldn't want parents like that? A fun good-looking charming dad and an extremely intelligent, classy, and caring mom.
My dad didn't actually sit me down and talk to me about boys except to warn me to keep my panties on.  I'm always instantly attracted to men who remind me of my dad or my brothers. They're handsome, fun, loving, and always there for me. I still managed to screw up in my choices of men even with a great dad and mom. I think that I saw the charm and wasn't on guard for the selfish and sometimes violent and possessive sides of men. I hadn't been exposed to those things growing up and didn't know what to look for. I assumed everyone was as loving and good as my family was. I wish I hadn't had to find out that isn't always the case.
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| Mar 2, 2007 @ 10:06 AM |
Daddy's girl
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lj450
Posts: 8,411
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My father taught me that sex should smell like stale cigarettes and cheap liquor. He also taught me that whiskers can chafe a soft bottom.
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| Mar 2, 2007 @ 10:27 AM |
Daddy's girl |
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BandTMom
Posts: 28,436
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Things my father taught me.
A very strong work ethic - an honest day's work for an honest day's pay. If you're well enough to get out of bed, you're well enough to fulfill your day's obligations.
Honesty - lying is worse than stealing. Treat others better than you expect them to treat you.
Kindness - think before you act.
Selflessness - family first
And above all.......love.
Because my father lived, I see the basic good in all people and try to live my life in a manner that brings good to all.
Would I marry a man like my father....in a hearbeat!
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| Mar 2, 2007 @ 10:54 AM |
Daddy's girl
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beckyiv42000
Posts: 12,065
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My biological father was not around but the man who was /is and will always be my DAD my brother in law Clair taught me more than I could think was humanly possible to teach someone...he taught me to be patient. to be strict but loving to mychildren, how a FATHER is supposed to be like by never abandoning his kids when they needed him EVER!!! even if that meant tough love..he taught me so many things and HOW to work with others, glazing (his profession) woodworking, auto repair, construction a myriad of other things ..he taught me that the fewer words used to get a point across thebetter (stop laughing yall k?) he taught me that a couple can stick it out to the end IF they BOTH compromise and work together... this is really hard to write for me we lost my DAD (BIL)in May of last year my sister and him were married for 43 years and I miss him everyday ... he was THERE for me ALWAYS ..whats funny is I might have let down my mom and my older sis at times flaking out etc I NEVER let down my DAD EVER.. it was a matter of pride with me he was so good to me i never wanted to dissapoint him ... would I marry a man like him?? In a friggin heartbeat!!! he was a saint ...
edited to add ... the MAIN thing he taught me was LOVE and HOW a man is to LOVE his family and the woman he is married to. my sis and him with THE most in love couple I have ever seen
[Edited on 3/2/2007 11:02 AM]
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| Mar 2, 2007 @ 10:57 AM |
Daddy's girl |
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BandTMom
Posts: 28,436
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