| Dec 1, 2005 @ 8:38 PM |
baggage
|
|
JustMeFred
Posts: 8
|
Could someone please tell me what you consider as baggage in going into a new relationship. I'd like to know if I am right or not.
|
|
  |
|
| Dec 1, 2005 @ 8:43 PM |
baggage |
|
waiting41
Posts: 1,926
|
do you mean like should you take your packed suitcases on the first date in case it goes well? hmmmmm.......i might wait......you can always go home and pack. 
|
| |
|
| Dec 1, 2005 @ 8:59 PM |
baggage
|
|
skinnybarncat
Posts: 368
|
Hmmmmmm, not sure myself, unless it is like the girl i started seeing and withing a short time i found out that she had had two men commit suicide while with her....she probably had more "baggage", but i had barracaded myself into my house and wouldn't answer the phone or door.... 
could that have been baggage?... 
|
|
| |
|
| Dec 1, 2005 @ 9:03 PM |
baggage |
|
jdctx
Posts: 162
|
Baggage refers to any issue from a past relationship you might bring to the new one...A lot of it is perception..
An ex who is still in the picture..Either by you or perhaps battles with child support..
|
| |
|
| Dec 1, 2005 @ 9:05 PM |
baggage
|
|
spongebob777
Posts: 7,904
|
I had a girlfriend who's psycho mother threatened me with a knife whenever nobody was looking.
|
|
| |
|
| Dec 1, 2005 @ 9:12 PM |
baggage |
|
waiting41
Posts: 1,926
|
I had a dog that threatened to commit suicide everytime I had to leave for work in the morning.
|
| |
|
| Dec 1, 2005 @ 9:22 PM |
baggage
|
|
AngelLight
Posts: 5,470
|
Could someone please tell me what you consider as baggage in going into a new relationship
As human beings we all have "issues"  to some degree or another, like things we need to work on within ourselves or in relationship to others. Issues simply remain issues if they are things we decide to work on or address. 
"Baggage" is when we have issues and don't deal with them  and accordingly the issues interfer with our ability to have a healthy relationship with ourselves or others
Just my take on it 
|
|
| |
|
| Dec 1, 2005 @ 9:28 PM |
baggage |
|
AngelLight
Posts: 5,470
|
[QUOTE]I had a dog that threatened to commit suicide everytime I had to leave for work in the morning[QUOTE]
 Waiting, you say you had a dog...did you pack the dog's bags and move him out or did you help him (or her) with his "issues"
I only wanna know 
|
| |
|
| Dec 1, 2005 @ 9:30 PM |
baggage
|
|
Wibber
Posts: 162
|
Still hung up on the ex, lots of kids, mental issues, financial issues are all baggage. I'm 47-- I wouldn't date a guy with young kids. Mine are almost grown and that's the way I like it.
I have a friend who is living with a guy who has 4 kids, the oldest severely screwed up on drugs. Bad choice for her. Now she isn't working and they bought a house together a couple of years ago so she's stuck.
|
|
| |
|
| Dec 1, 2005 @ 9:34 PM |
baggage |
|
RAKS37
Posts: 611
|
Always bring a tooth brush and pillow.
Girls like a prepared guy. 
I'd say if "your just like my x" and I loved it when so and so did this" come up in conversation.
or they start crying uncontollably when a song comes on the radio.
they just might have baggage.
I wonder though too what qualifies as baggage.
I was with someone for over 15 years, I know it's a big dating no no, but if they want to know more about me, something might come up in conversation.
|
| |
|
| Dec 1, 2005 @ 9:39 PM |
baggage
|
|
waiting41
Posts: 1,926
|
Okay, I feel the need to be serious for a minute. I like to keep this issue simple. I just consider people that have baggage issues to be those people that do not have the ability to "let go". However, I never never would refer to anyones children as "baggage". If someone doesn't want to date someone with children that is fine, but, I believe that to be a huge misuse of the term.
|
|
| |
|
| Dec 1, 2005 @ 9:51 PM |
baggage |
|
MotownManiax
Posts: 7,881
|
Oh, I think there’s a whole bunch of Baggage types...
Emotional -- painful memories, mistrust and hurt carried around from past sexual or emotional rejection.
Financial –- partners that are heavily in debt, can't manage money, or looking for a sugar daddy/mommy. They will look to you as their own personal bank.
Familial –- deadbeat or needy siblings that want to monopolize your partner's time, money, and emotional well being. People with nasty, misbehaved kids, or exes that love to meddle and interfere.
Health –- inheriting problems associated with people that have mild or chronic illnesses or other health issues that require you to be caretaker/caregiver.
Baggage can come from within the person and without. Whatever the source, it's things they're unable to deal with and drag into a relationship, forcing you to deal with it also.
[Edited on 12/1/2005 9:52 PM]
|
| |
|
| Dec 1, 2005 @ 10:01 PM |
baggage
|
|
MelMel
Posts: 183
|
"lots of kids"..??? Kids are not baggage.. if anything.. they are a definate plus!!
I think Motown said it best..
|
|
| |
|
| Dec 2, 2005 @ 10:09 AM |
baggage |
|
13lucky
Posts: 304
|
The best thing you can do..Is not talk about the ex in any shape or form...maybe down the road when your closer you can tell little stories(truths)..
But don't mess up a new relationship with garbage from the last..plus thats the reason you left, why bring it with you..
|
| |
|
| Dec 2, 2005 @ 11:42 AM |
baggage
|
|
skinnybarncat
Posts: 368
|
I had a girlfriend who's psycho mother threatened me with a knife whenever nobody was looking
did she want money or what?... 
Okay, I feel the need to be serious for a minute.
oh, that's the Funniest one yet, waiting!!!
,,,
i had a girlfriend who had six kids! the pets would disappear, objects would fly around the room and into walls, and the kids eyes glowed in the dark.....That's Baggage!!!
|
|
| |
|
| Dec 2, 2005 @ 12:04 PM |
baggage |
|
Pete73052
Posts: 19,368
|
Baggage is basically stuff the other person doesn't want to deal with. Like Motown said, it really can be anything - religious beliefs, pets, committments, psychological issues, financial issues, parents, etc. "Baggage" is in the eyes of the beholder - so really, nobody knows what represents baggage to someone else.
Fred, there's no point going into a relationship assuming you have baggage. Assume you don't and let the other person decide if you do or don't. Someone asking for "no baggage" is really asking for a Stepford person... we all have baggage - some pack light, some require attendants to carry it all.
|
| |
|
| Dec 2, 2005 @ 3:26 PM |
baggage
|
|
grumblebear
Posts: 10,494
|
hmm I think many of you struck it on the head... one of the reasons I don't date, and simply hang out online, is because of my health, I've a bad heart, caused by a couple of heart attacks brought on by allergic reactions, so I have lots of medications, lots of doctor appointments... so I consider that part of my own baggage, and since I wouldn't choose someone with these problems, I won't put them out for others
|
|
| |
|
| Dec 2, 2005 @ 3:28 PM |
baggage |
|
wandaful123
Posts: 1,511
|
we all have baggage - some pack light, some require attendants to carry it all.
How very true.... 
|
| |
|
| Dec 2, 2005 @ 3:30 PM |
baggage
|
|
ruready4me2luvu
Posts: 1,701
|
Kids are not baggage and anyone who refers to them as baggage is a dumba$$.
|
|
| |
|
| Dec 2, 2005 @ 4:46 PM |
baggage |
|
skinnybarncat
Posts: 368
|
Kids are not baggage and anyone who refers to them as baggage is a dumba$$.
Okay, personal insults, especially aimed at my best feature, may break it's bone....and you know how hard it is to put that in a sling...
 could we negotiate? I'll take 10 semi-normal kids if you trade for one of these that is the "child-of-satan"..
|
| |
|
|
|
|