| Dec 1, 2005 @ 11:58 PM |
Utterly weird "date"...Thinking I screwed up...
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BPHREEKEE
Posts: 223
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I have a co worker that I'm buddies with, we have a lot in common, and socialize on occasion. I'm a bit "free spirited", and he's a bit shy but coming out of his shell a bit. He's also a virgin at age 30.
So after a 10 day stretch at work we FINALLY get a few days off and pick a day to go see the new Harry Potter movie and grab some food after..
we see the movie and all is normal, and after we get out I light a cigarette and start the slow walk to the car so I have time to smoke,out of nowhere he takes my hand and holds it til we get to the car,ok no biggie.We have dinner and all is normal,onthe way to the car he puts his arm around me...not normal..but not really beyond friendly...so we have our normal conversation on the way to my house...he throws his arm around me again after I get out of the car and this goes into hug mode, during which he thanks me for the evening,as we pull back from the hug I could almost swear he was going to try and kiss me and chickened out...so he walks me to the door and asks for another hug...which is cool, but gets to be a bit extended and when we pull back this time... if he didn't, I was going to...when I realize that if I'm wrong, it's a major screw up because we have to work directly together every day, so I turn away and tell him good night...he's so sweet and there is an attraction there for me already...I think I just screwed up what could have been the beginning of a good thing....any thoughts?
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| Dec 2, 2005 @ 12:02 AM |
Utterly weird "date"...Thinking I screwed up... |
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buni
Posts: 978
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I would suggest maybe call him up and make another date, but let him know that you are worried about things because you have to work together.....
Do you think you messed up? If you think it might be a good thing I say go for it. 
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| Dec 2, 2005 @ 12:17 AM |
Utterly weird "date"...Thinking I screwed up...
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jbabynumba5
Posts: 7
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I think if you make another date he'll know you're interested and besides he could have kissed you just as well as you him. I agree with Buni,adress your concerns about working together and see what he thinks. I would go for it and if it goes badly just remember you're both adults and should be able to handle it that way and continue being coworkers. i hope it all goes the way you want
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| Dec 2, 2005 @ 12:39 AM |
Utterly weird "date"...Thinking I screwed up... |
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gettin_it
Posts: 10
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You should have asked him to spend the night.
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| Dec 2, 2005 @ 2:15 AM |
Utterly weird "date"...Thinking I screwed up...
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star131303
Posts: 88
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If he is a 30 yr. old virgin, then you probably did not screw anything up! I agree with just asking him out again. Just realize that he probably won't initate much in the beginning, so you are probably going to have to "make things happen".
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| Dec 2, 2005 @ 3:06 AM |
Utterly weird "date"...Thinking I screwed up... |
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BPHREEKEE
Posts: 223
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Thanx for the confirmation, I do definitely plan to talk to him about it, my main concern is the fact that we work on a team together...very closely... and as far as spending the night is concerned,I have teenagers here,I don't bring "friends" home.And he knew that nothing too "intimate" would be happening...we work together 9 hours a day 5 days a week, he knows my cycle as well as I do..lol...and it isn't a good time for me...I just want to make sure he understands that it wasn't a rejection...I just don't want things to get too weird...I do really like him...
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| Dec 2, 2005 @ 8:53 AM |
Utterly weird "date"...Thinking I screwed up...
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MotownManiax
Posts: 9,737
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Hi Kee!
Personally, I'm always a bit leery about dating anybody from work, especially someone you work close with. Only reason being if you got hot and heavy then broke up, you'd have to see that person every day, 9-5. For some that would be utter torture...lol.
But I also realize the factors of attraction are intensified between coworkers for the very same reason -- you see them every day, understand their qualities, feelings tend to grow. Perfectly understandable.
Just please, be aware of the dangers.
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| Dec 2, 2005 @ 9:02 AM |
Utterly weird "date"...Thinking I screwed up... |
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Pete73052
Posts: 19,370
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I say throw caution to the wind and save this poor guy from a life of virginity. I agree you need to make this happen - just do it... er... him.
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| Dec 2, 2005 @ 9:13 AM |
Utterly weird "date"...Thinking I screwed up...
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waiting41
Posts: 1,926
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"save this poor guy from a life of virginity" 
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| Dec 2, 2005 @ 9:22 AM |
Utterly weird "date"...Thinking I screwed up... |
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MotownManiax
Posts: 9,737
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Hey, I was a virgin until...uh, never mind. 
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| Dec 2, 2005 @ 9:23 AM |
Utterly weird "date"...Thinking I screwed up...
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BPHREEKEE
Posts: 223
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"save this poor guy from a life of virginity"
I've done this for one co worker already! Is this now my mission in life?!
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| Dec 2, 2005 @ 9:28 AM |
Utterly weird "date"...Thinking I screwed up... |
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skinnybarncat
Posts: 381
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mo, as usual, is correct!...don't get involved unless you are willing to suffer the consequences!  ..
"save this poor guy from a life of virginity"
I've done this for one co worker already! Is this now my mission in life?!
Yes!...and a noble one it is!!!!
Where did you say you worked? are they hiring?... 
[Edited on 12/2/2005 9:35 AM]
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| Dec 2, 2005 @ 9:42 AM |
Utterly weird "date"...Thinking I screwed up...
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BPHREEKEE
Posts: 223
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I work for the evil Wal~Mart, and we always need fresh meat...Um... new people...
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| Dec 2, 2005 @ 10:34 AM |
Utterly weird "date"...Thinking I screwed up... |
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MotownManiax
Posts: 9,737
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lol Kee! 
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| Dec 2, 2005 @ 10:51 AM |
Utterly weird "date"...Thinking I screwed up...
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suthunsweet
Posts: 227
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Be careful dating a coworker, I dated my boss...BIG MISTAKE. It was nothing intimate...just a date or two, but made things tense in the office (we are the only two in this office).
Needless to say, when I started dating someone else it made life pretty bad here. I just make sure I keep my personal life private and quiet in here!!! 
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| Dec 2, 2005 @ 11:59 AM |
Utterly weird "date"...Thinking I screwed up... |
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BPHREEKEE
Posts: 223
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I DO understand the dangers of dating coworkers, I did that once and it turned out that he was ALSO seeing one of my managers and didn't bother to inform me, it was apparently a bit serious to her, when she foundout she made my life at work hell for a few months...
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| Dec 2, 2005 @ 6:46 PM |
Utterly weird "date"...Thinking I screwed up...
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Heaveninawildflower
Posts: 18,615
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Well, having been divorced very early and a workaholic most of my life...my longest LTR was about 15 years and was with a coworker. No secret to anyone, we parted friends and still chat frequently. Of course, since we're both techies, pillow talk could be strange - system design, superstring theory, etc., but it worked for us...matter of fact, now that I think back, he was working in LA and I was in NY; a VP had been visiting out there and came back saying there was a guy I just HAD to meet...then we both ended up working in CT, and found the VP was uncommonly perceptive.
So, ya never know...
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